Promoted
by 1SuperKawaii
Summary: Multiple comedy stories each chapter a diff story all Bya/Ruki. Rukia has phone sex with the wrong person, Byakuya is way too posessive, Rukia learns about nightclubs, Rukia learns about couples counseling, Byakuya thinks shes dating Kenpachi
1. 1900SMXLINE

I have insomnia so this is what you get.

* * *

Getting Promoted to 1900-SMX-LINE.

"Where have you been Rukia you are late again?" Byakuya was annoyed but didn't show it when he asked.

She sat across from him at the dinner table.

" Captain Hitsugaya desired my services today. I must do as a captain requests" she said and stopped there.

If Byakuya had a clue how to talk to her he wouldn't have been stricken with this intense jealousy he was now feeling. Not that he had a right to feel jealous, he knew there were feelings between them, it was undeniable,they were just left unspoken. It would happen at it's own pace probably over the next twenty years. "I'm spending way too much time with Renji" he thought. There was no way he was going to wait that long to tell her.

Rukia went off to bed without saying another word.

The next day Byakuya was visiting with captain Ukitake. There was no sign of Rukia who last time, poured tea for them.

"Where is Rukia? He said with an abnormally evil look that made Jushiro wonder if the cat was out of the bag.

"Oh um well Byakuya I didn't want to tell you but she is with Captain Hitsugaya today. He needed her to help him out."

Why was she with him again today and why was Jushiro acting so strangely when he asked where she was? The rest of the day it was poor Renji who got the blunt of Byakuya' anger. And it was the rest of the day Renji acted the model Shinigami for once.

When he sat to dinner, Rukia was late again. He didn't question her. He just stared at her through the whole meal with a gaze so intense she was sure she would burst into flames at any moment. They ate in silence. Rukia at really quickly not knowing what was wrong and not wanting to know. She rushed off to bed.

The next day was the same. He sent his fourth seat over to the thirteenth with an excuse for some pointless paper work. When the unfortunate man returned and reported Rukia not at her division Bayakuya gave such a death glare that the man turned and ran screaming down the hall, he was also plagued with nightmares every night since.

"Captain I didn't want to bother you, I know you are really busy but these forms need your signature. They have to be at the tenth division by noon." interrupted a shaking Renji.

"Leave them here. I will take them." he said

"But captain you don't have to, that's my job. Don't worry yourself." he stammered

"I WILL take them." he answered so sternly Renji retreated to his office closing his door not wanting to know what upset his captain and not wanting to make him angrier then he already was.

Byakuya made his way to the tenth division. The division was ripe with gossip, thanks to a bored Matsumoto.

"They look so cute together" came one voice.

"And they're the same height." came another.

"Both have an ice zanpakuto's" said another.

" I think they should get married." commented another

"Oh there's Captain Kuchiki, I bet he's really happy about the whole situation." whispered another.

"Don't you have work to do?" he said to them

"Sorry Kuchiki-Taicho." they said and bowed in unison, then scattered like rats.

This is not what Bayakuya wanted to hea,r and he was becoming angrier by the second. His riatsu was flaring wildly and a new recruit was the unlucky one in the way of the flare-up. The poor guy wound up flying half way across the room learning a valuable lesson; Stay away from Captain Kuchiki.

Byakuya requested a meeting with captain Hitsugaya in the guise of the ridiculously unimportant paper work he was holding.

"Captain Kuchiki." said Matsumoto

"Come in have some tea. Its such a boring day." she whined.

"The captain should be hear in a second. How's Rukia-chan?" she winked at him.

"Matsumoto that is enough! Finish the work I left on your desk." came a harsh Hitsugaya.

The blonde retreated languidly and mumbled something about a white haired stick In the mud.

"I'm glad you came Kuchiki-Taicho. There is a matter of seriousness I wish to discuss with you."

"And what might that be Hitsugaya-Taicho?" keeping a respective tone.

Two serious captains looked each other dead in the eye. On the bright side Byakuya thought to himself at least it's not Abarai or Kurosaki he's about to have this conversation with. Hitsugaya was a captain and very respectable.

"I'm sure you've heard the rumors. Were both very busy so I will come right out and say it" he paused

"I want Rukia Kuchiki." he stated with a very straight face in a matter of fact way.

Byakuya was taken back by hearing it in such a manner, and almost lost his grip on the tea cup in his hand which clanked against the saucer loudly.

"You want Rukia?!" He exclaimed now wide eyed.

"You'll not have her. I'll not allow it." he reacted.

"Please reconsider. With Hisagi-san taking over the ninth division, I find myself left without a lieutenant. As he insists Matsimoto join him. I don't have a clue why. She's lazy and always late with her reports. But she's his headache now."

Byakuya was relieved at this. "You want her for your lieutenant? I see." His heart calmed down considerably.

" Ukitake has had her do many of the lieutenant duties over the years and he raves about how much of a help she has been. I need a hard worker who can take this job seriously. Her ice zanpaktou will also be an asset to me. Hers is the only other ice element able to stand up against mine. I will train her well. Hyorinmaro gets along well with Sorde no Shiroyuki. I believe it a good match. It will make my life much easier and I will personally see to her safety."

"Is that all, fine I have to go." Bayakuya left so relieved he didn't realize what he agreed to until he was half way back to his own division.

Rukia was promoted and several weeks had passed. Busier then normal she didn't find much time to spend with her friends. The last time she went out with them was to celebrate her promotion. They had laughed so hard and got so drunk. Renji was teasing her about her admiration for her brother. He would pretend to be Bayakuya and Matsumoto would pretend to be Rukia.

"Rukia come home now!" Renji said in Byakuya' voice. He did it so well you couldn't tell the difference.

"Oh ni-sama, ni-sama you are so wonderful. Kiss, Kiss, Kiss" Matsumoto said mocking Rukia.

"I hate you two" Rukia said.

"And don't make fun of ni-sama" she said waving her fist.

They all laughed so hard Hisagi fell on the floor.

Rukia had missed spending time with them. But it didn't stop them from calling her every time they went out without her.

"Hello Rukia this is ni-sama, let's have phone sex." Said Renji pretending to be Bayakuya with a laughing Matsumoto in the background.

"Idiot" she said hanging up.

*ring*

"Hello" she asked.

"Rukia this is your ni-sama, lets have hot phone sex." Renji said.

"Renji you are such a moron."

"Rukia tell me what you are wearing." Renji said still in Byakuyas voice.

"Renji I'm not giving you phone sex no matter how much you ask."

This went on several times. At first it was funny but Rukia was starting to get pissed at the constant interruptions.

*ring*

"That's it!" She yelled

"If that idiot wants phone sex so badly I'll give it to him."

"mmmm hello I'm listening" she purred into the phone

"Rukia?"

"Good evening ni-sama. I'm so hot tonight."

"Rukia you should open a window. Where are you right now?"

Byakuya was wondering what was wrong with Rukia she was talking strangely. He kind of liked it and forgot what he called her for.

"Why ni-sama I am laying on my bed. Where are you?"

"I am in my study. Rukia are you alright?"

"What are you wearing?" she asked

"I am in uniform."

"Really, you look so sexy in your uniform. I bet you would look even sexier out of it. I'm wearing that light blue robe you bought me (Renji bought it for her and she was wearing it in the manner stated). Its so short. I should have worn something underneath. I'm afraid if I bend over one might see too much." she said the last part in a baby voice.

"R…R…Rukia, what's gotten into you?" Byakuya stammered for the first time in his life.

"Well I hope you get into me and soon. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out."

"*silence*"

Byakuya had slid himself instinctually farther under his desk in a futile hope to quell and hide the growing need for his sister.

"I bet your really huge and I'm so small. Its going to hurt when you slide it in. Will you go easy on me?"

Silence on Bayakuya' end. His mouth hanging so far open his jaw was at risk of falling off.

"Nothing to say? Does that mean I have been naughty? I'm getting on all fours. Would you like to spank me?"

Byakuya' heart was pounding. Rukia had surely gone mad, that had to be it. She had never been that bold before but for some reason he couldn't hang up.

"R..R..Ru." was all he managed.

Rukia thought she was getting back at Renji really well, and silenced her laughter. She could keep this up all night. Renji wouldn't be able to look her in the face the next day for sure without blushing like mad she thought, proud of herself.

"I wish you were here with me now B-ya-ku-ya-sa-ma." she let his name roll off of her tongue smoothly.

Byakuya thought he would loose it hearing her say his name like that.

"A..and what would you like me to do to you if I were there." he said desperately wanting to hear more.

"Well I'm lying on my back with my legs open…"

*click*

Serves him right she thought.

"Ruki?." she heard her brother call from the hallway. "Are you in bed?"

"Yes ni-sama I am. Come in. What can I do for you?" she blushed a bit thinking about the pretend phone conversation she thought she just had with Renji. She would have loved to have said those things to her brother but knew it would be impossible.

"You know exactly what you can do for me. I don't know what got into you this evening but you've driven me insane for too long. I will have you now." he said this walking over to where she was on the bed. She sat up and he put his hands on her legs and split them apart.

"Ni-sama! Whats..whats ooh ni-sama." she moved her head to the side and closed her eyes while he kissed her neck.

"Say my name." he said his hands running all over her body.

"Byakuya."

Hearing this only made him moan and push her down on the bed. Positioning himself between her legs, he undid her bow and exposed her naked skin.

"You've been naughty Rukia. I'll have to spank you later." he said

She then realized what had happened. It wasn't Renji she was talking to and tried to confirm her theory.

"Did you like our phone conversation?" she asked.

"I don't know why you picked tonight to speak to me that way, I am so pleased you did. You should have done it sooner."

Rukia was pleased too.


	2. Posessive In Love

My late night attempt to pair these two up again in a hilarious manner. Definitely going to be a crack fic. Rated T+ for now.

Ok this didn't turn out as funny as it was in my head. It became mushy instead and I'm struggling for an ending. But it's still cute.

* * *

Possessive in love

Byakuya was possessive. It was just a part of his personality. It wasn't until Rukia started dating here and there, he realized how much he really wanted her.

At first it started small. Then when she left the house with one of the most attractive Shinigami from the 3rd division, he became uncomfortable and found himself waiting up for her. The next time she went out with him, not only did Byakuya wait up, but he got himself all worked up thinking about what horrible things that boy could be doing to his precious Rukia. They could even be, dare he think it, kissing and someone had to put an end to that.

The boy had the audacity to walk Rukia to the door. Byakuya watched them from the window. They had spoken to each other for a moment then he leaned in and tried to kiss her. The boys eyes were closed so he didn't see it coming when a slew of cherry blossoms came straight for him. They picked the poor guy up and shot him over a good portion of Seireitei, leaving a shining tail blazing across the sky.

"Look Kenny a shooting star." said an excited Yachiru.

The following day, there was a lot of talk and speculation about what the strange sighting over Seireitei had been. There had even been mention of aliens which made some people really nervous. At the same time a new recruit from the 3rd division had gone missing. Some say he was abducted others say he was eaten by a hollow. Rukia was one of two people who knew the reason he didn't call her for another date or show up for work the next day.

Rukia was used to that by now. If she wanted to see someone it had to be during lunch. Byakuya had insisted on taking up all of her other spare time. She wasn't sure why he insisted she be there with him so much. He barely spoke to her and she even found it strange when he insisted on accompanying her to the Chappy store.

"Good morning ni-sama. Breakfast looks yummy." Rukia gave Byakuya a big smile. If he wasn't so good at hiding his feelings he would have fallen over drooling much like Renji usually did.

"I can't find Sode no Shirayuki again. Have you seen her?"

"I believe she is with Senbonzakura."

"Again? They have been spending way too much time together. What could they possibly be doing anyway."

"I do not know Senbonzakura will not tell me."

Rukia' phone rang. Byakuya was giving her that glare of death at the disturbance. Byakuya got tired of Rukia' phone ringing. There was always some male Shinigami on the other end taking away her attentions. He wasn't going to stand for it. He had warned many handsome Shinigami to stay away from his sister. If he had to kill half of soul society to keep them away from her, so he could keep her for himself, he would.

"Hello. Oh hi Renji, no, no, um well I can't today. I know I couldn't yesterday too...I know I've been having lunch with him for the last few days.. Renji?..Look its ok he's really nice and he's been upset since Rangiku left him…. said something about preferring girls who put out more and preferring kinkier sex."

At this Byakuya looked up at her reinstating 'the super glare of death' as Rukia liked to call it. She moved out of the room to finish the conversation. Byakuya was tempted to eavesdrop but didn't have to when she started yelling at the phone.

"Well your free to join Hisagi-san and me for lunch…Renji?..God you are such a pervert… I have not yet…don't you dare… You know I would never.. What do you care anyway idiot…Its my own business who I do that with…you leave him alone… Renji! Renji!"

Rukia reentered the room and sat back down to breakfast. "That idiot left me with no one to have lunch with. Oh and he's going to be late something about killing that bastard and he knew she was off limits."

"Rukia I suggest you choose who you spend your time with more wisely, and wait until I deem someone worthy of your affections. I think you would be happier having lunch at home from now on."

"Really ni-sama you worry too much. What are you doing for lunch today?"

"If you wish Ukitake Jushiro is having lunch in my office today tell him to bring you."

"Ok that sounds good. Thank you ni-sama for inviting me."

Byakuya was sure to walk her out the door and to her division. He had been doing that a lot lately. He didn't like taking any chances of leaving her alone where she could see some other guy.

Rukia didn't notice the super glare of death Byakuya gave a very handsome Shinigami who tried to say hello to Rukia. Instead the boy backed away slowly with a look of fear.

"I wonder what's wrong with him? He's usually so friendly." she asked, lloking concerned.

"I would not worry yourself." he said.

"Have a good day ni-sama. I will see you at lunch" she bowed and entered her office building.

Some time later:

"I'm so glad you are joining us for lunch today Rukia, your brother is so quiet and I have to admit he makes me nervous." said Ukitake.

"Well I guess he is quiet but he's really nice once you get to know him." she said cheerfully.

"Shunsui Kyōraku will be joining us today too." he said looking at her wondering if she was stretching that last part a bit.

"I haven't seen him in a while." she stated.

"Rukia you haven't been training much lately. Is something wrong with your sword?"

" It's Sode no Shirayuki. Ever since the rebellion, and she materialized, she has been spending all of her time with Senbonzakura. I promised to let her have her freedom so I wont stop her. I'm calling her back now. "

"That is strange. Usually our swords do not seek out each others company and can not keep from fighting." he said.

They reached the 6th division and were greeted by Byakuya, Renji, and Kyoraku.

"Rukia pour the tea." demanded Byakuya who was staring down Renji because she sat too close to him.

Zabimaru was out in her materialized form and running about. "Rukia, Its Rukia." she said petting Rukia' hair.

Sode no Shirayuki was shaking demanding to be let out.

"Fine, I'll ask, go." Rukia said to her.

"Ni-sama Yuki wants to know if Senbonzakura can come out."

Senbonzakura had been also noticeably asking to come out too.

"If it will quiet them both down." he said.

The three zanpkteau left the room.

"Rukia-chan I'm happy to be having lunch with such a cute girl today." said Kyoraku.

"Thank you Taicho. I'm glad to be here. How are things at the 8th division?" she asked.

"Oh fine, fine. Say has anyone found that boy in the 3rd division that went missing last month?" Asked Kyoraku.

"I don't think they did, I've been wondering that myself. They said there was a mysterious light in the sky that night." Ukitake said.

"Oh do you think it was aliens that took him?" Renji asked a little too seriously.

"Idiot there's no such thing as aliens." Rukia said whacking him on the arm.

Byakuya cleared his throat audibly.

"The new training methods." he said changing the subject.

Zabimaru had come back in looking upset.

"They ditched me again." She said going back to sword form.

"Curious activity I wonder if Muramasa still has some influence over them?" Ukitake asked.

"Hey I think they might like each other. You might have baby zanpktuo soon." Kyoraku elbowed Byakuya.

"That's very funny." Rukia said nervously.

A large bang on an adjoining wall echoed loudly.

"What was that noise?" Byakuya said to his lieutenant like he was supposed to know.

"I don't know the office next door is empty. They must have started work on it early." Renji answered

Another large bang and another and another. Then a woman's moan.

"Sounds like someone is have fun in the other room." an amused Kyoraku said.

"Renji go and find out what is going on." Byakuya was noticeably annoyed.

Another large bang and a male and female both moaned loudly.

"Now, Now don't interrupt them." Kyoraku said

"I agree it should be over soon and we wouldn't want to embarrass anyone. When this happened in my division we just had a meeting about discretion and proper behavior." Ukitake said.

Byakuya was not happy at the thought of having to give that lecture.

"Oh god Senbonzakura." came a woman's voice

"Oh yes Shirayuki." The male followed.

Everyone froze. Wide eyed. Then Rukia covered her mouth. Renji fell over on his cushion spilling tea on Byakuya who luckily had not gained control of his senses. Jushiro Ukitake blushed and Kyoraku smiled.

"Oh god Shirayuki." came the voice again with another bang on the wall.

"Well Rukia-chan, Byakuya-sama we solved the mystery of why they ditched Zabimaru." Kyoraku laughed.

"I didn't know they were able to do that?" Renji looked confused.

"I've heard of it. Very rare cases. Zanpaktuo are an extension of the soul. So what the soul wants, even if the master doesn't realize it, the zanpktuo can act out on its own. In this case the extension of Byakuya and Rukia' souls seem to be in love or at least desire each other." Jushiro stated, unsure.

"What do you mean in love? How can that be. That's impossible he's her brother!" Renji shouted.

"Now, Now Renji calm down. There's nothing to worry about. They're not blood related. Seems like Kuchiki-sama has been keeping something from us." Kyoraku provoked.

A swirl of snow and cherry blossom petals now danced and twirled outside of the window like pink and white ribbons.

"Aw there they go." Kyoraku said motioning to the window.

Byakuya was no longer making eye contact with anyone and Rukia was blushing like mad.

"I think we had better be going. It seems there is much to be discussed. Rukia why don't you take the rest of the day off." Jushiro told her. She grabbed onto his sleeve shaking her head trying to say something she couldn't manage to get out.

"Its ok Rukia. I'll see you tomorrow." he said running out the door.

Renji left in a huff nearly tearing the door off of its hinges when he went to open it and Byakuya had moved to the window. If he looked out of the window he wouldn't have to make eye contact with anyone, especially Rukia.

"Its been fun as always Byakuya-sama. Let's do it again soon." Kyoraku said leaving closing the damaged door behind him, trapping Rukia inside, who was now desperately trying to regain control of her voice.

Byakuya motioned to Rukia to stand beside him.

"It seems Renji doesn't like trees." He said.

"I really liked that tree too. Renji and I have had lunch under it for many years."

"Yes I know." he said.

Renji was outside. It seems he had released his Bankai and anger on the tree which was being lifted from its roots and shaken terribly. Then it had been reduced to a pile of sticks. Thats when Byakuya turned to face her.

"Have you been watching all of this time?" she asked looking up at him.

"Yes, for quite some time." he nodded.

"I..I see. Do you..um like Ukitake-Taicho said."

"I no longer see a need to keep it to myself. What he says is true. Rukia…"

She had cut him off with her lips. He had fallen back a bit at the surprise, but returned her kiss with a passion he never showed her before and it made her kiss him even harder. She slipped the scarf from his neck and grabbed onto the sides of his shirt both pulling him close and sliding it off of his shoulders.

He moved his hand to her sash and undid her bow, the sword falling to the floor with a clank. It wasn't long before his Zanpakuto had fallen on top of hers.

(If I can ever figure out how to write a decent sex scene, I'll put it here. I'm working on it.)


	3. Betty

Betty

"Ichigo I don't know about this outfit. Is this really what girls wear to this night club place? You humans have really strange customs." Rukia said.

" Come on Rukia it will be ok. I spent all day and a lot of my allowance to see you in that outfit. Do this for me just this once. See you're the spitting image of Betty Paige." he held up his lighter.

Rukia was wearing a black lace-up corset. Her small breasts propped up. A very short leather skirt with visible garter belt straps on each side of her leg sticking out and they held up black thigh high stockings clung to her body. She wore shiny black knee boots that made her at least six inches taller and shiny gloves that covered most of her arms. Her hair style had changed significantly too thanks to Ichigo making her spend the morning in a salon.

"Oh and don't forget this." Ichigo said handing her a riding crop.

"What am I supposed to do with this." she asked genuinely not knowing.

"Come on lets go, I cant wait to show you off."

"Are you really sure this is appropriate?" she was still unsure and rather uncomfortable being so exposed.

Ichigo was quite excited to check out this new club. It had an interesting reputation and he was unable to get any other girl to go with him. So when Rukia lost a bet she was stuck going.

Ichigo was getting older. He was at an age where he wanted to experiment and try new things. Rukia was the one stuck dealing with his changes.

"This place is loud." she yelled.

"Just enjoy it let me get you a drink." he yelled back.

Everyone was indeed wearing like clothing. But each was very unique. Many of the women wore way less then she was wearing, and she was sure one girl wearing a clear plastic dress, was indeed a man, making her feel a little bit better about her appearance.

"Ichigo I'm a bit older then you so I really feel I should give you some advice."

"What's that? Come on lets dance." he said.

"I really do not believe any of these women to be a good choice for child rearing."

"What?" he asked.

"Child rearing? Can you hear me?"

"Yeah, I heard you. It's not what I want them for."

"Oh, right." Rukia blushed feeling naïve.

"Rukia-chan you need to loosen up."

"I'm just not used to this sort of thing." she said nervous enough to ignore how he just addressed her.

"I know how to help you." he grabbed her by the wrist and led her away.

"Ichigo I really don't want to." she was really hesitant to go with him.

"Oh now, now, you just need some confidence in yourself. I know you better then you think." he gave her a quick peck on the cheek and she blushed again.

Ichigo took her to the back of the club. He stopped at the bar and said something to a waitress. She couldn't hear their conversation and Rukia was getting nervous. Dragging her into a room that seemed like a private club he went over to a woman who was dressed very much like Rukia only she was taller and was stacked like Matsumoto. Ichigo passed the woman some cash and had a short conversation with her. The woman grabbed onto Rukia forcefully dragging her away. Rukia' limbs were waving wildly.

"Don't worry Rukia-chan that's Mistress Mini she will help you." He waved at her smiling. Rukia had a look of horror on her face and was still struggling when the woman took her to a small room. Ichigo is definitely spending too much time with Urahara, he is acting way too much like him.

"It's ok. That cute young boy you were with told me you needed to improve your self-esteem." she looked at Rukia who was now standing more dignified.

"You are very pretty you could have any man you wanted. Someone like you needs to be more comfortable in her sexuality. Your untouched arent you? That's the problem."

Rukia nodded.

"It's ok we can work around it. Now lets work on how you stand." Rukia followed her instructions.

"Very good. Now how are you at giving orders?"

Rukia was very good and comfortable giving orders, she's trained many.

"Comfortable."

"Comfortable what? She commanded.

"Comfortable Mistress Mini." she said in a very assured and stern tone.

"Very good you are learning quickly. You need to learn to be in command of those around you. A man can easily be controlled. It sometimes only takes the slightest move of your body to get him to submit."

"I get it."

"It's in your eyes, there's someone you are thinking about. Is it that young man?"

"No the one I'm thinking about is much older and has already been married once. I don't know what to do."

"I will help you. I can see it in you, you will enjoy this. Now you see there are many men in power who enjoy being spanked, tortured, and berated. Others like to be in full control. That's just how they are. It's just a matter of giving them what they want."

"But I don't want to give myself to anyone but him." Rukia declared.

"You wont have to. Here drink this straight down. It will calm you." she gave Rukia a shot glass full of whiskey.

"Have you ever hit anyone?" the mistress asked.

"Yes, I can fight If I need to." What a question for Rukia whose life was full of battle.

"I'm going to give you a chance to take your frustrations out on someone. Come with me. It's ok just try it once. We can stop if you don't like it."

Rukia allowed herself to be led to another dark room where a man was blindfolded and tied up to a winch in the ceiling in a bent over position. He was in a white tea shit and had white boxers with light blue stripes.

The woman grabbed him by the face and began to call him all sorts of names. His only replies were "Yes Mistress Mini I am a maggot I need to be hit."

"Come here hon. You have that crop use it. Go on."

Rukia hesitated and gave him a little tap on his behind.

"More please Mistress." The man begged.

"Now I know you can do better then that, really let him have it."

When she was returned to Ichigo much later, Rukia really did seem more confident. She stood up straighter and Ichigo thought it was incredibly sexy the way she was carrying herself. The men around her in the club seemed to have come to the same conclusion and Rukia had to fend off many perverted admirers and ignore many pleas.

Rukia did feel more confident. She was glad she met Mistress Mini and would be sure to visit with her again next time she was in the living world. Humans did indeed have strange customs but she really benefited from this one. She thanked Ichigo.

Ichigo was a little overcome with desire between his hormones and the alcohol he endd up gropeing Rukia. She tripped him and he fell on his back. She gave him a serious look making Ichigo want her more, then she realized she over reacted.

"I'm sorry Rukia -chan I just couldn't help myself."

"Urahara you bastard!." she yelled realizing Ichigo never uses honorifics.

"I knew it was you. Oh what now." her phone rang.

"Come back to soul society immediately. You will be met at the gate with further instructions." Kiyone said.

"I have to go but just wait until I get back. I'm going to kill you." she ducked down an alley and quickly entered the gate with her gigai still on.

"Bye Bye Rukia-chan." Urahara/Ichigo said waving.

"Rukia, You…wow Rukia what are you wearing, its hot, you look more confident, nice but we can talk later. You need to go to your brothers office. He has requested you see him immediately. No delays. Renji says he has been difficult all day. This always happens when your gone and I don't want to be the one to have kept you from him. You know how he gets when he is kept waiting." said Kiyone.

"But my gigai?"

"Leave it on. I think it will help your brothers mood." Kiyone said winking at Rukia.

Rukia quickly made her way to the sixth division headquarters. She entered the main building and walked down the hall being greeted by whistles and comments from men who were supposed to be standing guard. Rukia assumed her brothers soldiers would be better behaved then that. She shrugged her shoulders, held her head high and kept walking with her hips swinging and her confidence gaining by the second.

"Oh my god so hot."

"Sexy."

"Damn"

"Wow."

"I love you."

*drools*

Byakuya was in his office sitting at his desk filling out forms. Renji was busy about the room moving papers to and fro. It was a very serious and stressful environment at the moment. They both heard some of the comments from the hall but neither bothered to stop to see what was going on.

"Ni-sama you wanted to see me?"

"Come in." Byakuya commanded still reading the paper in front of him.

Rukia walked through the door in full dominatrix regalia. She stood giving off a demanding presence in front of her brothers desk waiting to be properly acknowledged..

Renji was the first to spot her. His eyes popped out of his head and he dropped all of the papers he held in his hand. He didn't see them fall to the floor because he couldn't take his eyes off of her.

Byakuya noticed the papers fall.

"Abarai what…"

Byakuya shot up out of his seat, upon seeing her standing there holding a riding crop in one hand and tapping it in the other. His eyes now as large as Renji' were and he stumbled back a bit. Then he sat back down and slid far under his desk to hide his body's automatic reaction.

It was the first time Rukia ever saw such a reaction from her brother and she liked it.

"You wanted something Ni-sama?"

"I..um Rukia is that typical human attire?"

"Your message seemed so urgent I didn't have time to take off my gigai. Whatever you'd like to do with this body later you can." her manner of speaking was sexy and controlled. Byakuya had paused for a moment before answering her.

"You did not answer my question." he commanded starting to play with her.

"Well Ichigo bought them for me. It seems people dress like this in places called night clubs. Staying near Ichigo is part of my mission. But they don't pay me enough to do what that little deviant is into. So yes It's typical human attire. I can wear it more often if you like." she smirked daring him with her eyes.

Byakuya closed his eyes for a second and took a breath calming himself.

"I have business that needs your attention." he said regaining his composure. Poor Renji hadn't moved from his spot or spoken, his hand still out holding air where the papers once were.

"As always you have my full… attention." she pouted her lips at him, wondering what his next move would be, she put her hand on his and a crooked smile crept upon his face.

The alcohol and lessons Rukia had earlier, had helped in her confidence and it made her bolder. Her brother was always the object of her affections and tonight she was going to have him.

Byakuya pressed a button on his desk and a young male came in with a file. The boy stopped and a crazy smile was sprawled on his face. He shouldn't have done it. Everyone knows the boy knew better, but he couldn't help himself.

Grabbing Rukia on her rear, she used the same move on him she did Urahara earlier. She dropped the boy to the floor in one fluid move and pressed her left heal into his chest holding the riding crop pointedly at his throat. She was severe and flawless in her movements. Byakuya stood up again and moved next to Rukia. Renji was still doing a great impression of a statue.

The boy tried to move.

"I did not give you permission to get up." she commanded, eyeing him with an intensity that would burn a hole in the floor. The boy froze.

"Rukia!" Byakuya said.

"Touch me again and I will remove your manhood." she let the boy get up. She whacked him hard on his behind when he turned to run out of the room.

"Chire!" Byakuya commanded.

A wave of cherry blossoms chased the boy down the hall, disciplining him properly.

"I will not tolerate anyone else touching you." Byakuya approached Rukia his eyes never leaving hers.

"What did you need me for this evening?" she inquired again.

"Sign this." he said.

"Is that what you called me back for? You know this could have waited until I returned from my mission."

They both faced the form on the desk. She took the pen out of his hand and wedged herself between him and the desk. Her back was to his chest and he pressed himself hard against her, his body completely covering her as he placed his hands on both sides of her on his desk.

"I could not wait to see you. It seems Urahara did a better job with you then I expected." he whispered in her ear.

"Ni-sama." she replied in a low voice with a hint of shock.

"Abarai take my sister home." he turned from her.

"Y…Y…Y…yes cap…cap.. captain, gladly. Let's go Rukia." Renji now very animate took Rukia by the wrist looking like a little kid given free range in a candy store.

"I mean MY home Abarai. Never mind I will take her." he smirked and scooped her up quickly.

He used his fastest Shunpo to get her back to the manor leaving Renji standing there disappointed and again immobile.

Byakuya was wishing he had a smaller house at the moment, having trouble navigating the intricate corridors that he could normally walk blindfolded. He threw her on the bed and got on top of her as soon as he could get her into his room. He started kissing and biting her on the neck while she reached to touch his hardness.

"Rukia I love how you tease me. I will not wait for you any longer." he said while untying the laces of her corset exposing her now bare breasts.

"I wont make you wait anymore Ni-sama. I've been wanting you to do this to me for forever." she bit his lower lip.

"I warn you Rukia I'm going to be rough with you."

"Promise?" she said as she traced the side of his neck with her tongue.

He took her lips hard and ground his body onto hers. She let out a small squeak. She smiled in delight at what she was able to make her brother do. She only wished she had done it sooner.


	4. Board Games

The first half has a nice G rating until the kids leave.

* * *

Board games.

Rukia had the day off. It wasn't a normal day off for her but she had a duty to attend that Byakuya didn't wish to do. One of the lower houses of the family were had set this particular day aside to make a pilgrimage to a sacred place. Unfortunately for Byakuya they were quite insistent on sending their brood of children to stay with him this year.

Rukia never saw her brother beg before but she was sure this is what a begging Kuchiki looked like. At first she insisted he spend time with his cousins, then he nearly ordered her to stay home with him. She couldn't refuse his request, he looked too cute and as always did anything he asked anyway.

So the four children arrived two boys one nine and the other ten, a girl of four, and an infant of nearly one. Rukia was no stranger to taking care of children. She grew up taking care of other strays like her in the 78th. Byakuya however had probably never even held a child. Rukia was handed the baby and the servants who delivered them seemed to have turned and run from the house.

The eldest boy reminded Rukia of Byakuya, he was polite, quiet, and had a commanding presence for one so young. The second boy was a lot more energetic and wild it didn't take more then a few minuets after their arrival for him to make his sister cry. The baby was at the moment quiet.

"So are you just going to dump us on the servants like everyone else?" Daishun the eldest surprised her by asking.

"No of course not. Were going to have a fun day together. Your cousin Byakuya-sama regrets that he has extra to work today and will be in his study." she said.

"Its ok were used to it." Ryu the nine year old said.

"Nonsense, why don't we just leave the servants alone today, I don't think any of them are used to having children around. Let's think of something fun we can do." Rukia said.

"Were not allowed to have fun." Daishun said.

"Well we wont tell anyone, will we?" she answered him.

Rukia figured the best thing to do with the kids was take them outside to play. One thing she remembered was the never ceasing amount of energy everyone had. She wondered where that energy went when she realized she wasn't as young as she used to be. Byakuya was sitting outside filling out forms. When a bunch of loud voices signaled him to run away but he wasn't fast enough to pick up all of his work and get away. Maybe he could just leave the papers and duck into one of the rooms.

Itoko-sama was the only thing he heard as Daishun bowed to him, Ryu ran right into him for a hug and Choko the girl looked at him scared at first then gave him a quick hug on the leg. He was uncomfortable at first but stopped noticing all the fuss when he caught sight of Rukia holding the baby.

"Now kids Ni-sama is a very busy man, let's not keep him." she eyed him like you owe me for this.

"Yes, there is much work to be done." he said repeating the mantra in his head, she's my sister, she's my sister while returning to his paper work.

The boys got into a game of tag leaving their sister out making her cry again. Rukia was prepared for this and had a servant purchase a small ball and a bat just for this occasion.

"Now I'm going to teach you a popular human game" she was still holding the baby.

She wondered what she was going to do with it, she couldn't play with the kids and hold the baby at the same time. She got an idea.

"Ni-sama hold this." He put his arms out at the question and she gave him the baby and ran off to the other children.

"Rukia, get back here!"

"I cant here you." she began playing with the other children.

Byakuya was looking at this baby who was looking up at him with equal confusion. Realizing how small it was, his thoughts changed from killing Rukia to wondering what their child would look like. Then he stopped himself and continued the she's my sister mantra that wasn't very useful.

Rukia and the children ran about for an hour. Then a kitchen maid came out with a bottle for the child. She noticed Rukia with the other children and was a bit shocked to see who was holding the baby. She was scared to give the bottle to Byakuya but the baby seemed to sense food was near and began to cry.

"Here sir, it is his feeding time." she said bowed then backed away like the ground was on fire.

Byakuya at least had an idea of what to do with the bottle. Rukia peaked over and swooned when she saw him feeding the baby. Was there anything he couldn't do? Rukia learned the answer to that when he began yelling for her and she came running wondering what had happened. There was indeed one thing Byakuya Kuchiki couldn't do, change diapers. She took the child from him.

Lunch was served in the kitchen. Rukia thought it would be fun for them to bake some cookies together. She doubted they had ever been in the kitchen before and would benefit from the change of scenery. Rukia placed the baby down and Choko was quite content playing with her doll and sitting with the baby. Rukia got the boys to participate by teasing them and telling them they weren't smart enough to make cookies.

It seemed everyone was having fun. Until one boy hit the other with some flour and the other retaliated, the whole situation had gotten out of hand. Rukia wound up in the middle and the three were covered in flower.

"Rukia what is all of this noise?" Byakuya caught sight of her covered in the mess and thought she looked really cute with that worried look. It took all his resistance to stop himself from laughing. He didn't want to interrupt the fun they were having but some amount of respectability should be enforced.

"Ni…Ni-sama!" her eyes widened like a child caught red handed and the room quieted.

"This behavior is unacceptable, what do you have to say for yourself?" He stood within four feet of her trying to look intimidating, and succeeding.

Rukia was more then sick of his scolding her for not being as perfect as he always was. There was nothing she wanted more then to wipe that stern look off of his face. What was the worst he could do to her anyway? He would never use his release on her, would he? Her eyes squinted and she picked up a large pinch of flour and moved toward him.

"I am warning you Rukia, you will be seriously punished." he stood his ground knowing what she was planning.

She walked right up to him stopped and flicked the clump of flower right into his face. He wiped some of it off and was really looking angry. Rukia realized it was a bad idea, why couldn't she stop herself? It was worth it though. The look on his face was priceless and would carry her through the years she was sure to do in the maggots nest for the act she just committed.

"I warned you." he said in his stern demeanor, she was scared to death and it showed.

He took a handful of flower and threw it at her. At first she was shocked. She thought he was raising his hand to hit her. She wiped it off of her eyes and then threw more at him. The boys started yelling and cheering them on as they pelted each other with flour. Somehow a bowl of batter had gotten into the mix, pardon the pun, and the two respectable adults were now a complete mess.

Everyone froze when Ginrei Kuchiki entered the room to see what all the noise was . He walked over to his grandson and wiped off a bit of the batter with his finger.

"Chocolate, very good." he said.

"Grandfather I can explain." Byakuya said feeling like he did when he was scolded as a child.

"It is all my fault grandfather." Rukia said.

"I do not care whose fault it is, you will have this place cleaned up, I do not think it right for the servants to have to clean this mess." he left the room.

"You heard him Rukia, you should hurry and have this mess cleaned up." he left quickly trying not to laugh as she yelled and threatened him.

It had taken long enough for her to become that comfortable with him and he didn't regret one moment of what just transpired between them. Rukia and the boys cleaned up the room an she employed the aid of the maids to get everyone bathed and changed.

Dinner was fairly quiet and the kids seemed to have really taken to Rukia. The youngest boy sat to her left and little girl sat to her right and cuddled Rukia, who was feeding the baby while trying to eat her own meal. Daishun was seated next to Byakuya and noticed his cousin staring at her. How could he not? She was a natural with these kids and all he could do was think about having children with her, well at least the act of making the children.

"Does cousin Byakuya like Rukia-san?" Daishun asked. Oh kids do say the darndest things.

"Yes of course I do." he said after a moment of trying to ignore it, sadly children don't let up.

"They get married like mommy and daddy." Choko said.

"Girl's are yucky. Besides I'm going to marry Rukia-san." Ryu said.

"No she's going to marry me." the two boys began to argue.

"Are you really going to marry Rukia-san." the eldest asked but both boys waited attentively for an answer.

Byakuya cleared his throat and signaled the servants that diner was done.

"Ni-sama why don't you keep the boys occupied while I put Choko down to bed." Choko wasn't in the best of health and needed her sleep.

Byakuya looked at the two boys and they looked back at him waiting for him to say something.

"Rukia, you have returned." he said relieved to see her.

"How about a board game, they are very popular in the real world. I have received a few as gifts. Here this one looks like it would be fun for you." she suggested giving him a box with a cartoon army on it.

Byakuya reluctantly played the game with the two boys who argued through the whole game. Byakuya kept looking across to where Rukia was sitting comfortably with the sleeping baby in her arms. She was just staring at the child and smiling, and he was staring at her.

Rukia put all the children to bed and got a really warm goodnight from her brother. The next morning everyone said goodbye as the children were taken home by a group of servants.

That evening Kyoraku and Matsumoto stopped by the Kuchiki house for dinner. They were getting into the habit of inviting themselves over, breaking Byakuya' peace and quiet. But it was an excuse for him to have Rukia near for the evening, even if there were others involved.

Three bottles of sake later, everyone was a bit tipsy. Byakuya remained the most dignified of the group and Rukia wasn't doing too bad only she kept staring at Matsumoto' breasts.

"Wow there are four of them." she said grabbing onto them at the amusement of Kyoraku.

"We should play a board game, how about the one I gave you last month." Matsumoto announced.

"I'll get it, I haven't opened it yet." Rukia went to fetch the game.

Byakuya didn't really understand what interests adults could take in a board game, but he didn't want to appear anymore stuffy then he normally was. Rukia would surely appreciate this gesture on his part so he did not object plus he had gained experience in board games yesterday.

Matsumoto set up the board, no one was paying too much attention to the red and pink color or the phallic markings.

"Were supposed to pair up for this game. Each team picks a card for the other team, then the team whose turn it is rolls the dice, they have to do the act or answer the question on the card. If the other team determines you answered honestly or properly performed the action you can move the number of spaces on the board." she said.

"Seems like fun." Rukia said. Byakuya was hesitant.

"I doubt you'll be able to beat Rangiku and me at this Byakuya-kun." he said daring him.

"Rukia, I believe we have been challenged. We must uphold the Kuchiki honor." Byakuya said.

"We will win, Ni-sama." she said determined.

"We'll go first." Matsumoto said.

"Where's the most bizarre place you've ever had sex?." Rukia asked, the question sobering her up a bit, what other type of game would Matsumoto have given her besides the dirty kind.

The two looked at each other, to see who would answer.

"Well There have been some interesting places but I would have to say the general office. What?" Matsumoto said with everyone looking at her.

"Well for me I would have to say upside down in mid air although…" Kyoraku said.

"We don't need to hear anymore, move your piece." Byakuya interrupted hoping that was the worst this game had to offer.

"Ok this question is for both of you. If you could have sex with anyone in this room who would it be?" Matsumoto asked.

The two siblings looked at each other and blushed. She had better say him, he was thinking.

"I um." Rukia said.

"Now Rukia we can not win if you do not answer. I would choose Rukia." he said making Kyoraku shoot up out of his lazy posture.

"I.I... would also choose Ni-sama." Rukia answered.

"How cute and you landed on re-do so you have to do another card." Matsumoto commented.

"It asks to choose Truth or Dare Tell me the name of the person you are in love with." she read.

"We should choose dare, should we not, Rukia?" Byakuya asked her.

"I yeah." she answered.

"You will have to do what is on the card." Kyoraku said grinning.

"We are prepared." Byakuya answered.

"The male shall lick something off of the females stomach. I guess since you wont do it you forfeit the spaces." Rangiku said sure it wouldn't happen.

"We will not forfeit." he answered it was perhaps the alcohol but he was really liking this game.

"Ok but it has to be to our satisfaction." Matsumoto said sternly putting her hands on her hips.

"Rukia remove your kimono." Byakuya commanded.

"NI SAMA!" she shouted.

"I gave you an order. I will have to do it myself." he opened part of her kimono exposing only her stomach. He kept his hand at the fabric between her crotch so nothing would show. Unfortunately for her his hand was very firmly pressed between her legs as she lay on the floor and it rubbed a very tender spot.

"All we have is sake." Matsumoto handed him a cup eagerly inching them on.

Byakuya poured sake on her and began licking it up to his hearts content not remembering there were others in the room.

"Ok you can stop now." Matsumoto said looking at Kyoraku who just shrugged his shoulders and smiled knowingly. Rukia straightened her kimono.

"Um.." Rukia was trying to focus

"The female on your team has to go topless for the rest of the game. Oh my." Rukia said.

The two looked at each other and nodded. Matsumoto removed her shirt and her boobs jiggled around while everyone tried not to look.

"I'm not embarrassed by them." she said holding them together.

Rukia covered her eyes and Byakuya did the best he could to not look or smile. Kyoraku however took the chance to fondle them a bit. Another two bottles of sake had been drained. They all might regret this in the morning but no one was complaining.

"Rukia… Rukia...Its your turn." Matsumoto said.

"Oh no I don't think I should." Rukia looked demure.

"Well if you want to loose. Here I'll help you out. Byakuya Taicho can sit over there, and I'll turn on some music." Matsumoto said.

"Go ahead Rukia were all friends." Kyoraku said really amused.

"Remember like we discussed at the last women's association meeting, make us proud." Matsumoto added.

"I will understand if you are unable.." Byakuya said to her, inwardly praying she would.

"I'll show you unable." Rukia began to move in between a very pleased Byakuya' legs to the music.

She gave him a more intense gaze then he was giving her as she rubbed her body all over him. When she had her back pressed to him rubbing her bottom on his growing hardness he could not control his hands and he ran them all over her, making her grind him harder. The other team was enjoying the scene and kept drinking sake. It was over way too soon for Byakuya' tastes.

Byakuya and Rukia returned to the game board Rukia kept staring at him. How on earth can he seem so calm when she couldn't catch her breath.

"Um well this isn't fair. It says you should fondle her breasts for one minute. You've been doing that all night." Rukia said as Kyoraku didn't need any push to do that.

"Well Rukia you got another truth or dare card." Kyoraku said.

"Dare we will take dare." Byakuya cut in making Rukia stare at him again. He was looking content and she was fighting the urge to lick every inch of that smug look off of his face.

"Ok Byakuya-kun, You get to move an extra space for every base you get with her." Kyoraku read.

He showed him the card which explained what bases were, making Byakuya very happy. Rukia looked confused having no clue what bases were. He didn't waste a moment and grabbed onto Rukia latching his lips onto hers nearly making her jump out of her skin. It only took a moment for her to calm as she began to kiss him back and he used the pressure of his thumb on her face to urge her to open her mouth.

"First base." Kyoraku called.

Byakuya began to fondle his sister and squeeze her small breasts. She wasn't putting up any sort of fight and began grabbing onto his hair, kissing him roughly. He didn't care for self control anymore, he wanted her and could always use the excuse of the large amounts of sake they had that evening if this ever came up outside of the group.

"Second base." Matsumoto called.

When he went for third base, again touching her tender spot, which was now very warm and wet, she grabbed onto his hand and helped him use the right motions.

"That's third base. Ok you get to move ahead." Matsumoto said.

Byakuya stood up an threw Rukia over his shoulder.

"Where are you going?" Matsumoto asked.

"I believe fourth base wins us the game." he said using Shunpo to leave the room with Rukia. The two guests looked at each other.

"We should probably go." She said

"Yep nice idea, with the game." Kyoraku answered her.

"Yeah you could cut the sexual tension between them. You know how I like to play matchmaker."

"I wish you would play matchmaker with me. Rangiku. I'm just a poor deprived captain."

"Nanno is right you really are a pervert." she starting walking away.

"Just let me play with those one more time, please." he said following her.


	5. Couples Counseling

**Couples Counseling**

**A typical morning in soul society… Rukia was preparing for her trip to the living world. She had not seen Ichigo or Orihime since their wedding six years ago. She was more then excited when they had contacted her to say they were not going to be in Karakura Town but were going to go on a special vacation to help their marriage. Although the place Orihime chose was one of the most romantic spots in the mountains, it was also a high activity area. Ichigo not wanting to disappoint Orihime, invited Rukia along to take care of any hollow issues and interruptions. Rukia however would have to bring a 'spouse' along for this type of mountain retreat.**

**Rukia wasn't seeing anyone, not because she didn't want to, there was definitely someone she liked, but she didn't think he was interested in her. To make this worse, this man wouldn't let her date anyone, and made her spend much of her spare time with him. Sometimes, she was sure, it looked like he was as interested in her as she was in him, but he always remained cold and passive, unless you were the poor bastard who dared to get too close to Rukia, then, well the writer of this story is really sorry for you.**

**She was getting sick of not really knowing what their relationship was. He would give her some attention and then pull back. It was driving her bonkers. The person she invited on this trip wasn't the man she was interested in, it was her best friend Renji, it would be the easiest person to have around for this sort of thing as they had known each other forever and they would probably have fun. It was in everyone's best interest that she not tell her brother what the mission involved.**

**Rukia rushed over to the sixth division when she realized she forgot to tell Renji to leave out the details of the mission. When she arrived he was no where to be found. The person she did find was the man who would not get out of her head, her brother Byakuya Kuchiki.**

"**Where is Renji? We have to leave for our mission in the living world." Rukia asked.**

"**So I have heard. He was "injured' this morning and will not be able to assist you." Byakuya said not showing a bit of concern**

"**Oh no is he ok? What happened?" Rukia was looking worried.**

"**He got too close to my blade and is recovering."**

"**What am I going to do about the mission? I'm supposed to have a husband for this. I have to help Ichigo." she said figuring he knew at this point, and was so worked up she didn't care.**

"**I have decided to accompany you." he said sending her into a panic.**

"**What! There's no need to trouble yourself, I can find someone else, I'll just head over to the eleventh and see if Yumichika is available." The last person she wanted to be stuck in a hotel room with was her brother. Well not really, but it would be way too hard for her to keep her hands off of him in such close quarters.**

"**I think a vacation will do us both good. I am not giving you a choice Rukia, and it is my job to look after you. Are you ready?"**

"**Yes sure." she gave up and they left.**

**Rukia and Byakuya got everything they needed from Urahara who had their gigais and luggage ready, and met up with Ichigo and Orihime or Mr. and Mrs. Kurosaki as they now were called. Rukia and Byakuya sat in the back seat and quietly watched the two bicker in the front.**

"**Your going the wrong way." Orihime said.**

"**The GPS says its this way." Ichigo snapped back.**

"**Oh, like last time when we were going to Tokyo and ended up in Osaka?"**

"**You don't know what your talking about."**

"**Just stop and ask for directions."**

"**I know where I'm going."**

**Rukia wondered what had happened to these two. They used to be so cute together and they got along so well. They had only been married for about six years, there was no way things could have become this bad between them. But you could cut the tension in the car. Rukia was determined to help them anyway she could, she wanted to see her two friends happy again.**

**The mountains were lovely. There was a strong chill in the air, not just the one coming from the two in the car. The hotel was small about three stories and rather compact. It was made of what looked like pine and the gabled roof was covered in snow. A man and a woman walked toward them.**

"**I told you I knew where I was going." Ichigo said.**

"**Yeah were only an hour late." Orihime said, what had happened to her cuteness?**

"**Hello I am Tanaka Rin and this is my husband Hiro we will be coordinating this couples retreat. I'll bet you're Ichigo and Orihime Kurosaki. I did not get the names of your friends."**

"**Kuchiki." Byakuya said sternly, making the woman jump back she took a second to compose herself and put on a fake smile and bowed.**

"**This is Byakuya and I'm Rukia." she said politely. The woman wrote the names on her clip board.**

"**How long have the two of you been married." the woman asked and Rukia choked at hearing the question.**

"**A very long time." Byakuya surprised everyone by answering.**

"**I see well were all here because we want to better our marriages. There is another couple who are already settled in. You will meet them in the group meeting. Please go in and get settled."**

**The group made their way to the front desk to check in. The man at the counter was typing away at the Kurosaki' information, then a bellboy took their luggage and they left for their rooms still arguing.**

"…**Yeah I'll bet your secretary knows all about that." Orihime said.**

"**I told you there's nothing going on with her."**

**Rukia and Byakuya looked at each other and shook their heads.**

"**We will need two rooms." Byakuya said.**

"**You are funny sir, what kind of accommodations will you and your wife like? Here are the prices." The desk clerk said.**

"**Give me your best room. I do not care about the price. Nothing is too good for my wife."**

**Rukia knew this was all an act but it didn't make it any less shocking to hear. She backed up from the desk and tripped over a large piece of black luggage, a bell boy helped her up.**

"**Very good sir."**

**They were taken to the room on the top floor and entered through the double doors. The room was fairly large for such a small hotel. A huge king sized bed was in the middle of the room and its fluffy pillows and a white oversized comforter looked plush and inviting. There was a fireplace with a bear skin rug and seating area in front of it. The bell boy got the fire going. **

"**Complimentary with this room." the bell boy opened a bottle of champagne and poured two glasses. Then he opened sliding glass doors to the outside and started a huge hot tub.**

**The bell boy held his hand out. "Will that be all sir…wow thank you sir anything you need anything at all just call."**

**Byakuya was smirking and looking at her in a very un-brotherly way when he handed the bell boy a tip. Rukia wasn't sure how much of this she could take. This was not going to be an easy weekend. He looked way too hot in that slightly open black button down shirt as it was, and the atmosphere was something right out of a romance novel. Byakuya took the two glasses and sat on the bed holding one out to her.**

"**Come, sit by me." he said.**

"**Um…I…um" she stammered not wanting to get close to him, the room was getting way too warm for her.**

"**Would you rather we used the Jacuzzi?" he shocked her by saying.**

"**No! I mean…I'll sit." she sat next to him and took the glass.**

**He turned to her and whispered in her ear. "I think this is just what we needed."**

'**What!" she jumped.**

"**A vacation. Really Rukia you must learn to relax." he was looking like his normal stoic self which made her even more freaked out.**

**They sat for a bit and finished off the bottle. Byakuya was trying to figure out how to use a hanger while Rukia picked up a book that was laying on the bed and flipped through the pages.**

"**Just look at this stupid book. How is any of this supposed to help married people? Step one let your feelings soar, step two it's ok to argue, step three don't forget to kiss, step four do something crazy, step five a little time in the bedroom goes a long way." she blushed at reading the last part out loud.**

"**I am unsure. I was only married for a few years. Your sister was always ill and I was busy with my new position. We did not spend enough time together to argue. She was also the kind of woman who knew her place." he said as he hung a jacket.**

"**Her place? What's that supposed to mean?"**

"**A wife should be obedient and should not argue with her husband." he hid his smile knowing it would get her worked up.**

"**Ni-sama that's barbaric, how can you think like that? If a man tried to tell me to be obedient I'd freeze the jerk." Rukia was making a fist and looking angry. "oh um not that you're a jerk Ni-sama."**

"**You are cute when you are angry. I do not believe it will look very proper if you keep referring to me as your brother."**

**Did he just call her cute? It was things like this that were diving her insane with desire. He would get too close or make a comment or both then look as bored as ever. If she didn't have amazing powers of self control, she would have ripped his clothes off long ago. What was worse was that his cold personality turned her on even more, it was like he knew and was intentionally teasing her.**

**The phone rang and they were summoned downstairs. When they got there they found Ichigo and Orihime who looked like they weren't talking to each other, Tanaka Hiro, and another couple already seated, in a comfortable seating area. A waiter served everyone alcoholic beverages and cakes while they chatted. Ichigo and Rukia were in deep conversation over mixed drinks, Orihime wasn't talking to anyone, much like Byakuya who was silent and giving his I'm too good to be here look while he ignored everyone and drank his hot sake.**

"**Oh good you are all here, I'll assume everyone had a chance to look my book over so lets begin. Why don't the Kurosaki's go first. Tell us why you are here." Rin said as she came in and sat down.**

"**Hello I'm Orihime and this is Ichigo, were here because we want to help save our marriage."**

"**Don't speak for me. Yeah, that's why were here." Ichigo said.**

"**Hi were Jun and Akiko Sasaki, we just needed some alone time from the kids this is our third time here. Great program." the man said cheery.**

"**Um...I'm Rukia and this is my n...I mean my husband Byakuya Kuchiki. Were here to support our close friends the Kurosaki's."**

"**I believe starting with step three makes this go easier." Rin said.**

**Rukia froze, Ichigo and Orihime reluctantly kissed as did the other couple. Rukia sat there looking up at her brother not knowing what to do. He didn't make a move, it looked like he was waiting for her to make the first move. **

"**That just leaves the two of you, come now it's important for the program."**

"**They're old fashioned and don't kiss in front of people." Ichigo tried to help them out a bit.**

"**Nonsense we can't move on until you do, frequently whatever is wrong will come out in the kiss. Let's hurry."**

**Rukia leaned in a bit but not nearly enough, and his emotionless eyes met hers. She just looked awkward for that moment but Byakuya took this as an opportunity to show her how he really felt. He was the one to pull her in and place his lips on a very startled Rukia. She closed her eyes and kissed him back, closed mouth and wishing it would last a lot longer then it did.**

"**Aww such passion after being together for so long." Akiko commented.**

"**See there's nothing wrong with our marriage so you can move on to someone else." Rukia managed to say while still looking Byakuya in the eyes, trying to control herself, she wanted nothing more then to kiss him again.**

"**Denial will not help anyone. I'm sure there's something you wish to work on, it looks like something is bothering you, why don't you tell the group, it's ok, were all here to support one another. Remember step one let your feelings fly like a bird. Holding it in is the only sin." Rukia thought this woman was a wacko.**

**Rukia looked at Rin, it seemed like she could see right through her. Everyone was waiting for an answer and it made Rukia even more nervous then she was already. She didn't know what it was that possessed her, it may have been the sympathetic eyes of the woman urging her on but more then likely it was all the alcohol that made her blurt out what she was feeling.**

"**Fine, you see that, that look is what I have been dealing with for half my life, he never gives me the slightest bit of emotion, sometimes I think he hates me. Then he goes and kisses me like that." she stopped herself there, realizing what she said, covering her mouth.**

"**Very good, Byakuya-san would you like to add anything."**

"**She is fully aware of my position and my responsibilities to my clan and my…employees, my personality has not changed over the course of our time together but I assumed with all of the years we have spent under the same roof she would be able to better interpret my actions. Rukia is aware that she is the most important person in my life." he crossed his arms not changing his expression.**

**He really was hurt at what she had said. He didn't hate her, it was far from it. All the nights he spent awake thinking about her, lusting after her, giving her anything she could possibly want or need, keeping her close and safe and this is what she thought. What more did she want?**

"**Important…yeah I was really important when you let them execute me." she said in a sad tone making everyone look at each other with a 'what' expression.**

"**She means when she was fired." Ichigo interrupted making the others reply with an oh.**

"**Always stepping in to save her." Orihime commented.**

"**I thought you had accepted my apology, have I not kept you safe and shared everything I have with you since I realized my mistake?" Byakuya said with slight anger in his tone.**

"**Only because of a promise you made to my sister, You really don't care about me. It's just because I look like her." the group was quite attentive.**

"**Yes you look just like her, but Rukia…your nothing like her…the moment I saw you…I never wanted anything more then I wanted you, but because of her I kept my distance." Byakuya said truthfully and Ichigo fell off of his chair at hearing the confession.**

"**Do you really mean that?" she looked at him hopefully with a huge smile.**

"**Yes Rukia, I am sorry I made you believe otherwise." he gave her a rare tender look and her heart was pounding.**

"**Oh, well were making good progress. How about we…?" Rin said but was interrupted.**

"**I'm here Rukia, sorry I'm so late." Renji barged into the meeting loudly and everyone turned to stare at him.**

"**What the heck is he doing here?" Renji was pointing at Byakuya who just gave him a sly smirk.**

"**Moron he's my husband. I thought you were injured." she tried to push him out of the room.**

"**Husband I thought he was your brother! I'm supposed to be your husband." Renji really was a moron.**

"**Renji you idiot." Rukia went into acting mode trying to look sweet. "You know I'm adopted and Byakuya and I have been married for years you know that, I turned your proposal down years ago, re-mem-ber? Now leave." she said the last part through her teeth to get him to understand.**

"**Rukia lets bring your friend in here. I didn't realize infidelity was an issue between the two of you. The both of you really looked so well suited." Rin said.**

"**Rukia, you are aware of how I feel about your relationship to my subordinate. I assumed you would not need his company if I spent more time with you. I see I was mistaken." he leered at Renji evilly.**

"**I swear there's nothing going on between us ni…Byakuya-sama. Renji just go home." Rukia panicked she was really being accused of infidelity by Byakuya and they weren't even together.**

"**Oh no, I haven't been able to spend time with you for months then that bastard tried to kill me this morning when I said we were going away together. I'm not going anywhere, until you tell me what is going on between the two of you." Renji was acting jealous as always.**

"**Ni-sama! You tied to kill Renji!? I mean Byakuya-sama." Rukia was just digging herself a deeper hole.**

"**What did you expect when he told me he was taking you away to be married. Did my behavior not show you how jealous I could be over you, every time I threatened one of your boyfriends and potential suitors? You should not have lied about your mission." Byakuya said scolding her.**

"**So what if I was going to take her away, I'm going to soon anyway and you cant stop me." Renji said.**

"**A baboon like you will never lay a hand on my pride." Byakuya said making Rukia swoon for a moment.**

"**Rukia just what the hell is going on between the two of you!?" Renji shouted.**

"**Renji it's none of your business and your making a scene." Rukia was now trying to dismiss his behavior and move on to someone else's problems.**

"**How the hell is it none of my business? I've been in love with you since we met and quit acting so high and mighty, you come from the same place I do, you were just lucky I let him take you in." Renji yelled, and you can imagine how all this sounded to the outsiders.**

"**Hold on, you let me? As I recall you said, oh Rukia I'm so happy for you going to live with a rich family it's no big deal that we wont get to see one another anymore but that's ok because ten years of being with you meant nothing. " Rukia was fuming because she was in love with him back then too.**

"**Damn it Rukia! Why don't you just leave him already! I'm sick of waiting for you to come to your senses." He grabbed her wrist and started pulling her out of the room, when Byakuya gabbed the other and started pulling her in the opposite direction.**

"**Abarai take your hands off of my sister. She is mine."**

"**How the hell is she yours!" Renji yelled. The heads of the people in the group were going back and forth between them.**

"**She is staying with me." Byakuya tugged her.**

"**No, she belongs with me." Renji tugged her the other way.**

**Rukia was feeling like she was being pulled apart, literally. The look on her face was that of confusion and worry. How did this situation get so out of hand so fast? **

"**Ok why don't we all just calm down and take a seat." Rin said.**

**Renji sat on the opposite side of Rukia and he and Byakuya were giving each other stares of death with Rukia sitting underneath. **

"**You know what I think, I think the whole reason our marriage is messed up is because you still have feelings for her." Orihime blurted out and pointed at Rukia.**

"**You know Rukia I have the names of some good doctors who can help you with sexual addiction." Rin said.**

**Rukia was so humiliated at that moment she sunk as far into her chair as she could. Chaos ensued around her. Ichigo and Orihime started yelling, Renji and Byakuya were about to reenact the battle of Okinawa and the third couple who seemed to get off on the hostility started making out.**

"**All right enough already." Rin yelled. "Why don't we all just dismiss for dinner this evening." she got up and dragged her husband out of there.**

**Renji decided he was staying the night. Dinner was eaten in mostly silence.**

"**Kuchiki-san I'm sorry about what I said. I don't blame you." Orihime said.**

"**Don't worry about it." Rukia waved it off.**

"**I hear you have a room with a huge hot tub. Let's all go to Rukia' room." Orihime said.**

"**I don't think that's a..." Rukia tried to say.**

"**Yes lets go I'm not leaving you in a room alone with him." Renji said.**

**Ichigo and Orihime were sitting in the hot tub relaxing. The bubbles piled up high, thanks to an over zealous bellboy. They looked like they were getting along better all of a sudden. It may have been Orihime' confession that she thought he had feelings for Rukia, and when he told her she was the only one he cared for their dispositions towards one another changed. Then they started kissing.**

**Rukia on the other hand was stuck in between Renji and Byakuya who were still shooting each other dirty looks. Rukia just took another drink of champagne. It seemed everyone decided getting drunk on Byakuya' dime was a good idea. The group was pretty drunk at this point which Ichigo proved when he pulled off Orihime' bikini top and she pulled some bubbles over her breasts to cover them as they bobbed up and down in the water. Ichigo pulled off the rest of her bathing suit then took off his and started making out with her again.**

"**Come on Rukia, It's not like I haven't seen you naked before, you did live in my room. Step four do something crazy." Ichigo said.**

"**Kurosaki!" Byakuya said, now ready to kill the boy.**

"**Lighten up Byakuya, you just afraid my wife is hotter then yours?" Ichigo said.**

**The next thing Rukia felt was her top being untied and pulled off in one motion.**

"**Ni…Ni-sama." was all she could say as she sunk more into the water to cover herself with the bubbles.**

**Somehow everyone wound up naked in the hot tub. Rukia had made the mistake of moving her right hand and resting it on, well you can guess what nude part of Byakuya her hand accidentally gripped. Luckily no one saw it happen but his eyes widened and he looked at her, his breath getting harder, among other things. She couldn't move as she was just sitting in shock holding this huge thing in her small hand. It only got worse for her when he put his hand over hers so she would not remove it. Then she calmed, gave a devious smile and moved closer to him desperately wanting to straddle him.**

**Renji, not having a clue what was going on under the water, put his arm around Rukia, pulling and tilting her toward himself. Rukia had be in mid motion, as Byakuya had taken his left arm around her waste and was trying to pull her to his lap.**

"**I warned you not to touch my sister Abarai, unless you want to spend the next hundred years in the filing office unable to walk." he removed Renji' arm and pulled Rukia to sit on his lap and wrapped his arms around her protectively. Rukia gasped at the sudden contact.**

"**Oh here we go again." Ichigo said.**

"**I think it's for Rukia-san to decide." Orihime said.**

"**Fine, I know she will choose me." Renji pulled her out of Byakuya' arms and kissed her passionately. When he finished, her head was left spinning at the shock. "You could never kiss her like that." he said.**

"**That is correct." Byakuya took her and kissed her so passionately that when he let her go she sunk right into the water and began drowning. Unfortunately for her the two above her were still arguing and didn't notice.**

"**What the heck is wrong with you two!" Ichigo yelled as he pulled Rukia up.**

**They stopped and looked at him in confusion. **

"**Kurosaki Ichigo, you should address me properly. As for this baboon, I believe it is he who…"**

"**Baboon! Why you stuck-up.."**

"**That's it I've had it with the both of you! Renji I am not in love with you! How many times do I have to tell you that! Ni-sama we need to talk."**

"**We'd better go. Always a fun time with the Kuchiki family." Ichigo said pulling Orihime out of the water and handing her a towel.**

"**Damn you Rukia." Renji spat and walked right out of the room and down the hall naked.**

"**So you are not in love with Abarai?" she shook her head at the question and wrapped herself in a towel.**

"**What was all that about? I don't want the two of you fighting, not over me." Rukia reached for him and he took her in his arms.**

"**I could not help it, when he tried to take you from me I was over come with jealousy. My apologies. I should not have behaved in such a manner."**

"**You were really jealous? You weren't just having some sort of pissing contest with Renji?"**

"**Rukia watch your language, I know I have left many things between us unspoken, I will have to make my intention clearer." He took her head in both his hands and kissed her again with even more passion then he did before. Their towels fell away and he then pinned her to the bed.**

**Much later, like the next day(Hey I never said there was going to be a lemon, this is T rated)….**

"**Good evening , it seems we are still missing a few."**

"**Oh Mr. and Mrs. Kuchiki wont be with us tonight, dear." Hiro said.**

"**Oh did something happen?" Rin asked.**

"**No everything is fine. The bellhop told me they were taking meals in their room, and they are staying another day."**

"**Oh good Mr. and Mrs. Kurosaki, the both of you seem to be doing better today."**

"**Yes we worked it out using steps four and five."**

"**And only one session. I need to write another book." Rin thought herself a genius.**


	6. She's Dating WHO!

A few days of fun and jealousy in soul society for your entertainment. Nothing serious, an easy light romance fic.

* * *

A quiet, quiet day at the serene Kuchiki manor. Yes the Sakura trees are in bloom, the birds sing, the air is clear, and did I mention all is quiet? We join the lord of the house sitting peacefully on the back porch with a tea set to his left and a calligraphy brush in his right hand.

He is about to use all of his precision to make the final stroke on one of the most difficult texts he has ever attempted. Just another half inch, the brush is almost touching the page, such precision, such perfection, such…

"Byakushi!" Yachiru yelled popping out from under the floor board, making the birds fly from the trees, the tea spill, and Byakuya' hand slip blotting the paper before him.

"What is it Yachiru?" He said looking far more bored then he was feeling.

"Byakushi? Got any Candy?"

"No, you do not need anymore sugar. What are you doing here?"

"ByaBya no have candy?"

"Bring her some candy." he said to one of the servants.

"Yea ByaBya the best."

"You did not answer my question. What are you doing here?"

"Kenny-chan is busy again with Ru-chan."

"Ru-chan?"

"Yep since she isn't here I thought you'd be lonely too."

"What is Rukia doing with Kenpachi?"

"I don't know, they said I was too young to understand. I like Ru-chan better then Boobies. Ru-chan is my bestest friend. I made a tunnel to her room so we can have sleepovers all of the time. I want her to move in with me and Kenny but Byabya would be lonely."

"Rukia will not be leaving this house." Byakuya said his intimidation not scaring the child.

"But I want Ru-chan to be my mommy, she's so much fun. Then I can marry Byakushi and we can eat candy all of the time. Hey where are you going?" Yachiro asked.

Byakuya got up and left the girl, who was now busy eating the sugary treats the maid had brought her.

"Hello?" Rukia picked up her phone shocked to hear her brother on the other end.

"Rukia where are you?"

"I'm out and I'm probably going to be late tonight. No need to worry Ni-sama."

"Rukia-chan Is that Kuchiki?" Kenpachi asked in the background.

"Yeah Ken-chan." Rukia said.

"Ken-chan?" since when are they so familiar? Byakuyas eyes narrowed.

"I have to go Ni-sama I'm really busy. Is there something you needed?"

"I just wanted to know where you were. Be home as soon as you can."

"Don't worry I'm safe with Kenpachi Taicho."

"Yeah Kuchiki she's in good hands with me, he he he." he said in the background.

Byakuya hung up the phone. His imagination getting the better of him. 'There's no way she would, not with that buffoon. I'm jumping to conclusions.' Byakuya felt a strong need to have her back home where he could keep a watchful eye on her.

Another two days had passed with Rukia missing from diner. Every night when she came home she was extra tired, she used to be happy if he requested her presence for a game or a conversation but lately she just wanted to go straight to bed. This was getting to be too much.

He was taking for granted that her attentions would always be available to him whenever he wished. Now all of a sudden, she hadn't been following him around like a puppy dog like she always did. At first he didn't fully understand why it bothered him, but every moment she continued to ignore him, his passions for her flared. 'I'm in love with my damn sister of all the stupid things I could have done. I have added myself to the long list of suitors she does not notice.' he thought. He was just going to have to up his game.

"Morning Ni-sama, Thank you for the flowers. It was quite a surprise."

"Good Morning Rukia, it was no trouble. Will you be staying home today?"

"No, I have plans today."

"With Kenpachi Taicho?"

"No, oh good he's here, I'll see you later Ni-sama thanks again."

Byakuya got to the window just in time to see Rukia hug an excited Leuitenant Hisagi. 'I swear if it isn't one its another.' he thought.

"Byakushi!" Yachiru yelled. 'oh god what did she want now?'

"Kenny wants Ru-chan to have these chocolates. I didn't think she'd mind I ate a few on the way here." Yachiru said handing him the box.

Byakuya spent the rest of the day wondering what the heck to think about that. Zaraki Kenpachi just gave his beloved sister chocolates. What sense did that make? There was no way that brute of a man could be involved with his Rukia. What the heck is she thinking?

"Morning Ni-sama, I was so excited when I opened the box this morning. The comb is beautiful. I wore it just for you today."

"I am glad you liked it. Will you be home for diner?"

" I'm still pretty busy again today, we'll spend some time together soon." she gave him a kiss on the cheek and ran off.

"Sir these came for miss Rukia."

"Flowers Chinese Bell Flowers?" he picked up the card. ' R, I hope these are the ones you like. Hisagi'

Byakuya was beyond pissed at the moment. For a brief moment he lost control of his self control and rushed out of the house in search and distroy mode. When he got half way down his street he stopped himself and realized the mistake he was about to make. Attacking a leuitenant out of the blue is not reasonable, no matter how he tried to rationalize the situation. He had managed to calm himself that evening by the time Rukia reached the front gate.

"Thanks Renji you're the best." she gave him a friendly kiss on the lips.

'"What the F**K!" Byakuya yelled and he pounded his fist against the wall hard.

"What was that?" Renji asked.

"I don't know. One of the servants must have dropped something. Anyway good night and thanks again." Rukia said

Rukia walked passed a very angry looking Byakuya in the hallway.

"What?" she asked scurrying quickly to her room.

The next morning Rukia woke to a lovely necklace with a small diamond pendant. But it wasn't long before she received a box from a delivery boy filled with assorted cakes. Byakuya grabbed the card.

'Ru these were the best in the shop- R'

"Rukia we really need to talk about your spending so much time away from home lately. Does something dissatisfy you?"

"Oh not it's nothing like that. I've just been training extra hard and I'm working on a special project everyone has been helping me with. Hey since you're here try this and tell me which one you like the best."

* * *

"Ukitaki Taicho."

"Byakuya sama it is good to see you."

"Will you please tell me what kind of projects you have Rukia working on that must keep her out so late."

"um I do not know of any such projects. Rukia has always been a hard worker. Is there something specific?"

"Is there something at the 11th division that requires her attention?"

"Not that I am aware. She is probably trying to improve her battle skills."

"I see." 'battles that end up with gifts of chocolate, someone is going to die.' he thought. His eyes burning with jealousy and anger.

"Now now don't go jumping to conclusions. I am sure there is no reason to be concerned."

Byakuya left the 13th division feeling slightly better about the situation. Jushiro had a way of putting people at ease. Then he felt two familiar riatsus coming his way.

"Ni-sama what are you doing here?"

"Kuchiki." Kenpachi greeted.

"Rukia explain your activities."

"What do you mean?"

"Never mind you are coming straight home."

"But it's the middle of a work day." When she saw the look he was giving her she didn't struggle and left with him.

"I wonder what is going on there?" Ukitaki asked.

"Seems Kuchiki has a crush on his little sister. So he's not as perfect as he acts. I knew it. This could be fun." Kenpachi said.

"I'm staying out of this, Is everything ready?" Ukitaki said.

* * *

"Here this note is for Rukia-chan but be sure to hand it to Byakuya." Kenpachi said.

"K. Ken-chan." Yachiru said and dashed off.

"Byakun Kenny has a note for Ru-chan." she handed him the note.

'Rukia, If that stuffy brother of yours will let you out of the house, why don't you come by the 11th for dinner tonight. Wear something pretty. Kenpachi.'

"Rukia declines." Byakuya said crumbling the paper in his fist.

"K I'll go tell Kenny. He'll be so disappointed. He really loves having Ru-chan around." Yachiru"

Byakuya made his signature turn with his hayori ballooning in the motion.

"Rukia." he walked right into her room.

"Hang on, Yeah Ni-sama?" she put her hand over the phone.

"I wish to speak to you."

" Ok let me just say goodbye. I'm sorry I have to go. Is it all set? Great. By Renji. Yeah love you too."

"Rukia why are you dressed for a formal event?" He grabbed her arm pulling her.

"I was thinking of going out. Ni-sama what's wrong? Your acting funny."

"I am not the one who is behaving poorly."

"What are you talking about?"

"Rukia you will stay home the rest of the day I demand your company."

"I…um…um… ok, I didn't have any plans anyway."

"Come with me."

"Oh Ni-sama what's the occasion? We never eat lunch outside? It all looks so lovely."

" I haven't been giving you the proper attention lately that you deserve. Our friendship that has developed over the past year has meant a lot to me and I hope we can become closer."

"Me too. I really like being with you. I promise I'll start spending more time at home. I didn't think you would miss me." Rukia said.

"Rukia I find my day is not complete without your company."

"Ni-sama, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

"I should also remind you, when considering a suitor, that you will not be allowed to marry anyone who is not from a royal family and you must have my full permission."

"Are you planning to marry me off? I don't want to marry some stranger! Ni-sama please let me stay here with you. I don't want to leave you."

It was so nice she jumped to conclusions. Her fear made her put her arms around his neck to hold on for dear life. Its one way to get a hug.

"It is alright Rukia. I wont force you into anything you do not wish to do."

"Promise?" she asked as he lifted her chin to look at him.

"I promise." and he kissed her nose making her smile. He placed a small chaste kiss on her closed mouth then looked to see her reaction. She wasn't struggling to get away and she didn't look shocked. So he leined in a bit more ready to give her the kiss he had been daydreaming about for the last year.

"Byakushi!" Yachiru yelled as Rukia and Byakuya knocked foreheads from being startled. Someone really had to keep that girl locked up.

"Kenny has a note for you."

'Kuchiki Don't interfere. You cant keep her to yourself. I see I'm just going to have to take her from you. Tonight 7pm outside the 11th training hall. K"

"What is it Ni-sama?"

"It is nothing. But I have to go out this evening. It will not take long."

"Oh Its almost 5. I have to make a phone call and I have some paperwork to finish." Rukia dashed off.

* * *

"Well, well, well Kuchiki."

"Did you expect someone else."

"I've been waiting to wipe that look off of your face for a long time."

"I wont keep you waiting." He drew his sword.

"Ken-chan and Byakun are playing." Yachiru yelled.

"Kenpachi Taicho!" Rukia yelled.

"Taicho!" Renji yelled.

"Its ok Rukia as soon as I beet him we can get married." Kenpachi said.

"What!" Rukia yelled.

"That will not happen, you will be slain by my blade." Byakuya said.

"You have no claim on her I will take her. She is just your sister."

"She is mine and she will be my wife not yours."

A loud ghasp came from both Rukia and Renji.

"I got him here just like you asked but I couldn't help myself." he shethed his sword.

"What is going on?" Byakuya asked.

"SURPRISE!" yelled a large group of people.

"Happy birthday Ni-sama."

"Happy birthday Taicho." Renji said.

"My birthday is not for another week."

"We wanted to surprise you. I knew this was a bad idea." Rukia said.

"Taicho Rukia went through a lot of trouble and so did everyone." Renji said.

"Why are we at the 11th?" Byakuya asked.

"Because it's the last place you would suspect. I should just have had Renji bring you hear instead of asking Kenpachi Taicho." she shook her head.

"When I discovered Kuchiki' obsession with our little Rukia I couldn't help but play on his jealousy and he played right into my hands. I didn't think it would be that easy. Your getting soft."

"We should continue out battle." Byakuya said.

"Anytime." Kenpachi said.

"I guess we can consider this an engagement party too." Matsumoto mused.

"Ni-sama did you just insist that I marry you?" Rukia just realized what was said a minute ago.

"Ahem." was his response as he looked away.

"Kuchiki go on and ask her." Kenpachi said.

"No don't ask her." Renji said waving his hands.

"Go on, yep, ask her, do it!" were the responses from the crowd.

"Will you?" he mumbled.

"Will she what? I don't think she heard you." Matsumoto said.

"Yep that's no way to propose." Hisagi said.

"Rukia will you be my wife!?" Byakuya asked, frustrated.

"There that wasn't so bad." Kenpachi said.

"Well Rukia?" Byakuya asked.

"Don't do it Rukia!" Renji shouted.

"Shut up Renji." Momo whacked him.

"Well, say yes." Yumichika said.

"I um… yes I will." Rukia answered still in shock her answer was followed by cheers from everyone. Well everyone except Renji.

"Rukia what about the gifts that came to the manor?"

"Gifts? Oh well Hisagi-san knows a florist, Renji helped with the cake, and Kenpachi helped me locate your favorite chocolates but um Yachiru ate them. Wait, you were jealous, all of this time. That's what all of this was about. The moment I stopped dedicating my every moment to you, you got jealous. I never expected you… "

Instead of letting her finish the embarrassing accusations, he decided the best way to shut her up was to give her that kiss he didn't get a chance to earlier.


	7. Behind Closed Doors

A Crack fic If I ever saw one. Rated M for the end. Rough and short Lemon. You have been warned.

* * *

Behind Closed Doors

Rukia walked through Seiretei as usual on her way to the Kuchiki manor. It was a proud and noble house. Clean, orderly and large. The army of servants were neat, tidy and better dressed and mannered then the average person. Scandal was never part of such a noble house.

The gardens were landscaped to perfection. Every blade of grass standing at attention and measuring a perfect 2 inches. Every flower in perfect bloom, every tree the same shape.

The entire place always ran at top efficiency. There was never a bad odor. Even the horse stables were immaculate and had a sweet scent. Somehow even the dirt in the garden looked clean.

It was to this house Rukia came home every day. She was not alone in this conservative old fashioned Japanese style mansion. Her brother the great lord of the clan, the noble captain of the sixth division Kuchiki Byakuya lived there too.

It wasn't easy for her to live up to such standards of perfection. Every moment acting properly, moving properly, speaking properly. When the two would go out, they shone like stars, prim and proper.

To say he was OCD was an understatement. It drove him mad if something was out of place, dirty, or if the proper etiquette wasn't followed. It was especially bad when they were out in public, Rukia, an adult would be scolded. Her brother held her to the highest standards when they faced the world and no less was expected inside the manor.

Yes every morning she had to spend an extra hour getting ready but it wasn't nearly as long as her brother did. His obsession with perfection was even worse. No one had hair that could compare to his. It was long, soft, and shiny of the deepest blue black. When he left the house he looked like a prince. Rukia had to try to live up to those standards of perfection everyday.

Things were getting hostile in the Kuchiki house. Years of pent up anger and repressed feelings had built for nearly a century. They were friendlier now, but Byakuya still treated her like a child that needed his guidance and protecting.

She was getting sick of not being allowed to do anything. The last time she tried to date he frightened the man off and he never spoke to her again. When she wanted to go out with her friends he made her stay home and have a quiet diner with him instead. When she bought a new dress to wear he made her go back and change before letting her go out.

They would argue like crazy, and finally, so she wouldn't have to listen to him yelling at her anymore, she would give in.

Rukia walked up to her front door and sighed. Then taking a deep breath she fixed her posture and walked through the door.

"Rukia we discussed your poor posture before." Byakuya said.

"What? How did you know?" she asked surprised at his insightfulness.

"The whole house could hear you stomping up the walkway. Which is another thing you need to work on." he said.

"Since when did this all become about me? As I recall I caught a certain jerk head of the household sneaking out to go eat commoner food the other day. " she pointed her finger at him.

"I do not sneak out Rukia. Besides I am the adult here." Byakuya said turning his nose up at her.

"Adult! That's a laugh. I'm just forty years younger then you." she yelled.

"Just do not say I was the one who called you an old woman." he poked her sensitive button.

Byakuya wondered what was wrong with the girl in front of him and why she infuriated him so much. It seemed to be her life's mission to make him miserable. She never appreciated anything he ever did for her.

One time she tried to go out with this guy who had the worst reputation, and instead of thanking him for getting rid of the sleeze, she yelled at him. Her friends weren't the most savory of characters and he took it upon himself to step in and make her stay home when he found out they were planning on going to a rough bar that night. If she had gone she would have been arrested with the lot of them. But did she thank him? No. Then there was the time she tried to leave the house in that short tight red dress without an escort, It was for her own protection he made her change.

"That's it I've had it!" she yelled waving her fist.

"Rukia watch your temper." he said.

"Temper! Temper! I'll show you my temper." Rukia at her wits end grabbed onto his scarf and began choking him with it…

"R.R..*cough* Ruk" he grabbed the long end of the scarf and tugged on it pulling her to the floor. She fell flat with a thud, her arms and legs sprawled out on the perfectly shined hard wood.

"If your trying to kill me you will have to do a better job then that." he said looking smug.

"I'm going to get you for that." she said looking up at him, hatred burning in her eyes.

"Really Rukia, your no match for me." he taunted her and waved her off.

"You just wait Byakuya Kuchiki when your not looking, I'm going to get you."

"Really Rukia do you really think you can threaten me." he said trying to intimidate her.

"You forget who knows all your secrets and weaknesses." she said standing up to him trying to meet his height and failing.

"Shall we make a wager on it?" he said.

"What do you have in mind?" she said her eyes narrowing.

"I will bet you can not go a week without loosing your temper."

"Well I bet you cant go that same week without correcting or yelling at me." she said

"Fine what shall we wager?"

"If I win you have to let me do whatever I want from now on without question." she said.

"If I win you have to be my personal slave and do as I say from now on." he said.

"Hell no!" she yelled.

"I doubt your intelligent enough to control yourself. Your already getting testy." he said taunting her.

"Deal." she said and they shook on it.

"Better keep a look out Rukia and I wont be here to help you this time." he said looking bored and walking away.

"You're the one whose going to need help Byakuya." she smiled because it felt funny not calling him Ni-sama.

"Address me…" he said and stopped himself from finishing the sentence.

"What was that Byakuya? Do you like how I address you? I think honorifcs are so old fashioned, don't you? I think the first thing I'm going to do is change out of this stupid kimono."

"Whatever you want Rukia." he said holding down his anger.

Most of Monday was quiet. The day went about normally until dinner

"Oh my I cant seem to hold my chopsticks tonight." she said proceeding to eat her food with her hands while wearing her uniform slovenly instead of dressing in an appropriate kimono for dinner.

If there was one thing Byakuya couldn't stand was a lack of manners and refinement. If she didn't use her best manners or dress appropriately it drove him insane. It was bad enough if someone else did it but not her, she was a reflection of him and if she was doing wrong it was his name it ruined.

"Yuck! Hot Hot Hot" she spit out her food and fanned her tongue.

"I am sorry Rukia I was under the impression you liked habaneras." he said watching her take a big gulp of water.

"You know I don't like… deep breath 1,2,3,4...deep breath…That was very thoughtful of you…Bya-bo." she said narrowing her eyes and curling up her lip.

"What did you just call me?" he said giving her a death glare.

"Bya-bo I think it's a cute name for a cute little man. Don't you think it's cute?" she said.

"It is very… cute Rukia." he said gritting his teeth.

"I'm going to bed now. Goodnight Bya-bo."

Tuesday 3 A.M

*boom**boom**boom* The entire house vibrated. Byakuya was shaken and startled from his sleep. He jumped up and grabbed for his sword, his head moving back and forth looking for an intruder.

'I'm on the highway to hell! Highway to hell!' *boom*boom*

"Rukia." he said ripping through his sliding door scattering paper and wood everywhere to get out, and grabbing onto the walls to push through the hallway ready to kill.

"Oh Bya-bo what are you doing up this late?" she asked.

She was wearing a night gown well if you could call the dental floss that just barely covered the most important parts a night gown then yes that is what she was wearing.

"Ruki…" he calmed himself. "…What are you doing my sweet Rukia." he said with his eyes bugging out in a very scary manner.

"I couldn't sleep so I thought I would listen to some music. I'm not disturbing you am I Bya-bo." she said giving him a seductive look and spreading her legs apart a bit to show some more skin.

"Rukia you put on some cl…I wonder if the problem you can not sleep is because you are cold." he said taking in her body with his eyes one last time before throwing a kimono at her landing it on her head.

Tuesday 7 A.M

"Where are my clothes!." she said sifting through the closets and drawers.

"Oh are you missing something my sweet Rukia?" he was leaning against the door frame.

"I took the liberty of buying yoy new clothes." he said.

"You know I don't like to wear k…" her fist was waving then she pulled her fists down to her sides squeezing them so tightly they turned white. "It was very thoughtful of you dear brother, to buy me all of these pretty kimono. Whatever would I do without a brother like you?" she said through her teeth. "Um what am I supposed to wear to work?"

"Might I suggest the blue one." he pulled out a blue one and handed it to her.

* * *

Rukia walked out of the house in the very same kind of kimono a fake geisha would wear the hem came above her knees and the top was cut very low. She looked more like a hooker then a geisha. Byakuya never expected her to walk out of the door dressed like that but she did.

*whistles*

"Oh baby"

"A geisha girl!"

"I'll give you a candy bar." another man said.

"THAT"S IT!" she yelled." No I cant get mad, I cant get mad. 1...2...3.…4...5. He's going to regret this one." she said flipping open her phone. "Kiyone inform he captain I will be a little late today, there's something I forgot to do at home."

"Hey Rukia, wow Rukia what's with the getup?" Renji asked.

"I just thought I'd wear something different today." she answered.

"You look so hot. You want to go out after work?" He was eyeing her like candy.

"I think that may be fun, lets go to that bar. You know the one." A light bulb went on in her head.

"Oh yeah that one. I never thought you'd want to go there. I'll buy you a lap dance." he said smiling devilishly.

"I have a better idea, could you do me a favor? You see I have this bet with captain stick up his ass."

A short explanation later.

"HA HA HA HA that's the funniest thing I've ever heard. Sure I'll help you but if he try's to kill me I'm blaming you." Renji said.

* * *

8 P.M

"Kuchiki Taicho there's a message for you. It says you must immediately go to this address you sister is in serious danger hurry." said his third seat. Byakuya didn't think he just began to move.

Rukia peaked out at the stage still wearing her short geisha costume. Drinking men sat around the stage waiting for the next song to start. Renji sat in the front row incase someone tried to get near her. He wouldn't normally allow her to do something like this but it shouldn't go very far.

Byakuya walked into the room which was heavy with smoke. Scantily clad women held trays balancing beer bottles and sake. Rukia spotted him and motioned for the music to begin.

"This next girl is fresh meat. Give it up for the blue geisha." *applause*

Rukia walked out onto the stage as the music began. Byakuya froze when he spotted her. It was his first instinct to grab her and drag her out of there but there was no way she would go through with it, she would surely stop on her own.

She pranced on the stage in her high heals and bent over.

"Oh yeah baby!" someone yelled.

Being a shinigami she was very limber and had no trouble with the acrobatics of the pole.

"Take it off!" a man yelled.

She teased with her sleeve.

"Hey handsome. Wow aren't you Byakuya Kuchiki? What are you doing in a place like this?" a waitress asked.

Byakuya didn't pay her any attention as he was filling with a mixture of extreme lust and rage. The patrons of this establishment will never know how close they were to being murdered that night.

In less then a moment Rukia was abducted from the stage, finding herself back at the manor being thrown onto her brothers bed.

"What's wrong Bya-bo? Couldn't wait to get me into your bed." she said looking self satisfied.

"Rukia… you have gone too far"

"Ah ah Bya-bo remember our bet." she said

"…My sweet sweet Rukia.." he calmed himself. "I simply wanted you home with me tonight. Do not be mistaken, I could never find someone as short as you attractive. You have the body of a little girl." he said.

"WHAT DO YOU Mean I… yes I am short aren't I. Although I'm not surprised you don't find me attractive considering where you work all day its obvious you prefer supple young cadets." she said with a crooked smile.

"RUKIA I…I shall show you my preferences." he startled her by grabbing her by her kimono.

Pulling her toward him he took her lips roughly and kissed her pushing her back on the bed. When she really seemed to be getting into it he pulled back and looked down at her on the bed with a smirk.

"Just a little girl and I prefer women. You better go back to your room." he said infuriating her so much she threw a pillow at him and stormed out of the room.

Byakuya was disappointed she left but if she had stayed any longer she would have had the upper hand because he wouldn't have been able to stop himself. Rukia was furious so furious she had forgotten what she had left for him in his shampoo bottle and she cranked up the music again.

* * *

5:30 P.M At this point no one has slept much in two nights.

"RUKIA!" Byakuya ran down the hallway to her room.

"Yes Bya… Bya HA HA HA. You look. Pft HA HA HA HA." she rolled around on the floor laughing.

"Do you think this is funny?" he said pointing at his hair now streaked and blotted with red and yellow spots.

"Oh opps. When I borrowed your shampoo, I guess I gave you a bottle of bleach instead. Oh now, no need to worry. It works on you. Pft HA HA HA." she kept laughing and holding herself while rolling around.

He went back to his room to calm himself. Picking up his Kensaiken the vein in his head nearly popped out. The sacred heirloom of beautiful platinum was now covered in pink paint and had chappy heads colored on it and huge pink rhine stones glued to it, the sad thing was he couldn't leave the house without wearing the damn thing and he didn't want to show her he was upset.

"She is not going to win!" he said placing the pink item on his head.

* * *

Byakuya passed his men in the halls all of which were whispering to each other.

"Taicho what happened to your hair? It looks..It looks… The thing in there is pink. HA HA HA." Renji laughed as Byakuya' fist shot out and met the mans jaw throwing him to the floor as the phone rang.

"What is it?" he answered the phone.

"Just wanted to say nice one last night. I didn't think you had it in you." Kyoraku said into the phone.

"What are you talking about?"

"Abducting a stripper! Right off of the stage too, you're my hero. If you haven't had your fill and want to go out again tonight. *click* hello?" Kyoraku said.

* * *

12:30 PM Lunch

"I see you haven't been able to dye it back." she shoved a huge spoonful of rice into her mouth letting lots of it fall to the floor.

"I will be working from here for the rest of the day. The salon will reopen in the morning." he said trying not to use his death glare.

"What is this its delicious?" Rukia said gobbling up her food in the most disgusting unmannerly way.

"Yes it is very good. It is something we have not had before. Oh the cook saved this for you." he threw a rabbits foot at her.

"It isn't a…a….a rabbit. Oh god." she got up and ran holding her mouth. Byakuya laughed as soon as she exited the room.

When she got to her room she screamed in horror. Making Byakuya laugh loud when he heard it from down the hall. There was her large pink Chappy The Rabbit plushy hanging from the ceiling beam by a noose in the middle of the room. His right eye dangling freely and white stuffing sticking out of his back.. She tried to escape the sight by running into her bathroom closing the door.

When she turned on the light she fell back to the floor. Her collection of 1951 Chappies of the month were all laying in a pile decapitated, all of their heads impaled on various items in the bathroom. Even her favorite one for that year, the light blue head was sticking out of the rubber duck.

She tried to escape the room but when she turned to the door the orange Chappy she just bought was stuck to the door with a knife. There was a note.

'Do not bother looking. You wont find the rest of your collection. If you admit defeat I might be willing to give them back. Your loving Bya-bo.'

She crumbled the paper. "It ends tonight." she said determined.

* * *

"Bya-bo are you ready for diner?" she asked.

"Rukia what on earth are you wearing?" he said viewing her wearing a potato sack with her hair sticking out in every direction.

"I hope you don't mind …I dressed for dinner." she said." Oh who could be at the door?"

"Hey lets party!" an already half drunk Matsumoto walked in through the door with Hisagi holding her up.

"Thanks for having us over." Ikkaku said entering with five other guys behind him.

"Rukia what is going on?" Byakuya asked.

"Hope you don't mind Bya-bo I invited some close friends and all the ranking officers from the 11th squad." Rukia said.

"Oi Kuchiki that look is an improvement." Kenpachi said laughing and pointing at his head.

"Oh that does not look pretty. I cant look at you anymore." Yumichika said.

"Bya-kun likes pink? I'm so happy!" Yachiru said grabbing onto his scarf and swinging from it.

"Crank up the music." someone yelled.

The scene was chaotic people were falling all over the place dancing, the music blared through every room. Items got knocked over. Byakuya was about to crack. But if he was going to crack, he was going to take Rukia with him.

"Oops I'm so clumbsy." she said smearing her dinner on his clean uniform.

"Oops It slipped." he said dumping a bowl of rice on her head.

"Sorry about your scarf." she said blotting soy sauce on the priceless item with her fingers.

"The filth will remind me of you sweet Rukia. What's that?" he asked quickly.

"Huh?" she said turning around. *slice*

"What did you just do? My hair!" she yelled.

"Senbonzakura thought you needed a trim." he said laughing.

She moved toward the hallway gulping a bottle of sake and letting it drip down her chin.

"You are not allowed… my sweet Rukia drinking might not be good for you." he said following her and chasing her into one of the empty rooms.

She kicked him in the shin so he pulled her by her messy hair.

"Tyrant!" she said pushing him away.

"I suggest you call this whole thing off now Rukia." he said, the noise in the background getting louder.

"Really! Me give up? I don't think so. You're the one who's going to give up. I can go on like this forever. Your going to want to sleep at some point. I'm never going to let you rest or leave this house looking respectable." she said.

"Say you give up now." he said pulling out Rukia' other favorite Chappy from his sleeve.

"You give that back to me now!" she demanded.

"Or you will do what shorty?" he asked.

"Is that the best insult you can come up with?" she said.

"I could think of some other things to call you but I am still a gentlemen." he said.

"I have no manners. I'm a monkey. Ooh booga booga." she jumped up and down in her potato sack dress.

"I am warning you." he held the rabbits ears in one hand and in the other he took out a lighter. His blotched hair and pink Kensaiken still in tact.

"Don't you dare!" she said the flame now burning and getting closer to the rabbits little foot.

"You know what you are?!" she yelled her eyes burning with anger.

"What am I Rukia!" he yelled.

"You're a big fat control freak!" she got closer to him.

"And you my sweet Rukia are a spoiled brat." he said.

"I'm the great lord Kuchiki I'm so much better then everyone else because the stick up my ass is the biggest." she said mocking him.

"Well I am a short helpless girl who can not achieve Bankai. Oh Save me Ichigo." he said mocking her.

"You stuck up noodle wearing ass!." she got in his face.

"Unrefined midget!" he said back to her.

"Snob!"

"Street Rat!"

"Bastard." she said as her eyes diverted to his lips.

"Bitch." he whispered onto her lips.

They looked at one another for only a moment before their lips met in full force. Their arms and hands running all over each others bodies. He slammed her up against the wall. She encircled her legs around his waist. He ripped off her potato sack dress in one pull. She tore open his kimono. He did not look for permission to enter her as his lips continued to smash against hers. He took her hard and continually banged her up against the wall. Each time he pumping her to the sound of the base in the background.

"You ready to give up yet?" he said biting her on the neck and moving in her more slowly.

"No and you already yelled at me so you loose. Ahhhh mmmm." she moaned.

"I do not think so my sweet Rukia. You are the one who lost your temper first." he said running his hands over her breast.

"I did not!" she yelled at him trying to move away.

"Your not going anywhere." he pinned her in place more tightly.

"Ok so we both lost." she said pulling on his lower lip with her teeth.

"I plan on claiming my prize every night and some mornings." he said then moaned and unloaded into her.

"If I lost and I'm your slave, you lost too, so you have to let me do what I want. That cant work."

"Sure it can. Do whatever you want. When you are a good girl I will reward you and when you are a bad girl I will punish you." he placed kisses along her jaw line an down her neck.

"I can live with that." she said as he captured her lips again.


	8. Threes Company

A stupid crack fic for you to get my mind off of the heavy fic I'm writing. Dont take this one seriously, just enjoy. It's longer then intended but funny.

"Explain again why my sister and Abarai-taicho can not handle this on their own." Byakuya asked kneeling in front of general Yamamoto who was fussing over tea.

"Yeah it's going to be no fun with him there. I finally get to be alone with Rukia and I'm stuck with him." Renji said.

"Things have been lagging in his division. I should be the only captain necessary." Byakuya said changing his mind.

"I have to insist you go with them, since the royoka is in the hospital recovering and all of the chaos that has been ensuing over the announcements of Rukia' required marriage. It will be better with everyone gone so things can settle." Yamamoto said.

"It was grandfathers wishes that Rukia choose whomever she wants of the available men in Seiretei." Byakuya said.

"I wish he would have just chosen someone. This is all getting out of hand. I'm being chased by mobs of Shinigami every time I leave the house. I never really even had a date before. I mean I almost had one until MR. Controlling here scared him off." Rukia said pointing to her brother.

"It will be good for you to get out of soul society so you can think more clearly. When will she be required to choose?" Yamamoto asked.

"Not long after this mission has ended." Byakuya said.

"At least she cant choose Ichigo." Renji said.

"I wouldn't have anyway. Can't believe that idiot broke nearly every bone in his body, it's all your fault too Renji." Rukia said looking at Renji angrily.

"How is it my fault! I didn't tell him to ride that motorcycle into a truck." Renji argued.

"It was your motorcycle, he's still underage. You should have been more responsible and not lent it to him in the first place." Rukia scolded.

"Abarai was never one to think of the consequences of his actions." Byakuya said not looking up from his tea.

"No one asked you." Renji said getting mad and the two men were about to draw swords.

"Damn it Renji don't talk to Ni-sama like that." Rukia scolded again.

"Do you always have to defend him? You follow him around like a puppy dog." Renji yelled.

"Speaking of people who follow people around like a dog..." Rukia said pushing his buttons.

"Abarai if you continue to disrespect Rukia I will.." Byakuya drew his sword.

"You'll what?" Renji drew his sword and took a stance.

"Ahem." the captain commander cleared his throat. "Now that I have your attention, the three of you are going to have to learn how to get along. Or are the three of you incapable of behaving like adults?"

"My apologies captain commander." Byakuya said.

"Sorry sir." Renji and Rukia bowed.

"You will patrol the living world. As I have said the three of you will be living together so I expect the reports from miss Kuchiki to be productive."

"But.." Renji protested.

"Make it work. It will only be for a short time. Rukia will return in time to choose a husband and end this chaos." Yamamoto said sternly.

Three days later….

"Rukia I'm hungry." Renji whined.

"Yeah what do you want me to do about it?" she said not paying him any attention.

"You're the girl." Renji said.

"You're a sexist pig." she yelled at him.

"I do find myself getting hungry." Byakuya said.

"I'll start dinner right away Ni-sama." and she scurried off to cook dinner.

"The spicy curry is here for Ni-sama and the mild is this one for you Renji." she said placing the last bowl on the table.

Rukia had worked hard and laid out a very lovely looking dinner.

"It is very good Rukia. I was unaware you could cook." Byakuya said looking right at her making her blush.

"Yeah well I ..." Rukia was cut off by a waving, yelling lunatic.

"Ugh hot!..hot!..hot! Are you trying to kill me?" Renji yelled getting up out of his seat and fanning his tongue.

"Didn't I tell you not to eat from that dish?" Rukia said annoyed getting him a glass of water from the kitchen.

"He never could take direction. So irresponsible." Byakuya said and picked up another piece of food to eat.

"Irresponsible! If you want to talk about irresponsible you're the one who left your division last week to your fifth seat for an entire day without telling anyone just so you could buy Rukia a present." Renji yelled without thinking.

"Ni-sama got me a present?" she blushed again.

"That was supposed to be a surprise. As I recall you let that hollow eat your ninth seat last month." Byakuya said focusing on his food.

"Rukia, I have so many stories about him when I was his lieutenant that would blow your mind. He's far from being as perfect as you think." Renji said looking at Rukia.

"Really calling yourself my lieutenant? It has been two years and has taken two divisions to figure out the mess of paperwork you left behind. It makes me wonder if you did any work there at all." Byakuya said taking another bite of his food elegantly.

"I'm taking Rukia out tonight." Renji said as a statement not a request.

"You will do no such thing. She will stay here." Byakuya said.

"You cant make her."

"I can do as I wish with her." Byakuya said.

"It's not up to you. I'm a captain now too and I say she goes with me."

"I out rank you." Byakuya said.

"How's the heck is that?" Renji asked pissed.

"It is a matter of strength and class."

"Oh yeah well we'll see whose stronger."

"Enough! The two of you stop bickering!" Rukia demanded. "If you wish to go out Renji then go. We have responsibilities to take care of, and with the two of you I don't have time for fun and games." Rukia said starting to clear the table. "and while your both at it, the next one of you who leaves their dirty clothing on the floor can do the damn laundry themselves."

The two men just looked at her stunned.

"She has never spoken to me like that before. It is all your fault." Byakuya said.

"She's always been bossy and how is it my fault?" Renji asked.

"She only reacted to your crass behavior. You should act accordingly in front of a proper lady."

"Rukia is no lady. Rukia's, well Rukia." Renji said trying to figure out what exactly Rukia was.

"I will not let you get away with insulting Rukia." Byakuya said.

"I 'd never insult her but bring it on."

"That's it! Both of your to your rooms right now!" Rukia demanded and dragged both of them down the hallway by their wrists.

"Now see what you've done?" Renji yelled from his room across the hall.

"What I have done?" Byakuya said.

"Now you pissed off the midget. You have no idea how mean she can be." Renji said.

"My sweet and innocent Rukia could never be mean."

"Yeah well she aint so innocent either. I've kissed her before, she'd never do that with someone like you." Renji said.

"You had better take that back or you will die where you stand."

"You forget whose girlfriend she was before she went to live with the likes of you." Renji said.

"It is good that she had come to her senses and rid herself of such a wretch before anything could come of your arrangement."

"I can marry her now too and you cant say anything. She's free to choose me and you are bound by the her courting rules. I can finally take her back from you." Renji said.

"You will never get near my pride."

"God! You in there." she pushed Renji in his room. "and you in there." she pushed Byakuya in his room. "Neither of you are to come out until you can act more civil. I don't understand why the both of you cant get along. Stop competing over me. I love the both of you."

"You cant love the both of us!" Renji said.

"Rukia you can not ground me. I am your older brother and captain." Byakuya said standing in front of her with his arms crossed.

"Oh can't I?" she gave him one of his own death glares.

"Um Rukia? I was still thinking of going out. Um…um…stop looking at me like that it's scary as hell." Renji said.

"If you want to go out go! So I can have some peace and quiet." she yelled as Renji ran for the front door.

"I think I will go to bed early tonight. Good night Rukia." Byakuya said trying to dodge her wrath.

"Oh no you don't. Your going to help me with the dishes." she dragged him to the kitchen.

"Rukia?" Byakuya asked confused since he never cleaned a dish in his life.

"This is a towel. You dry a dish like this." she proceeded to show him how.

"I know how to dry a dish Rukia." he took it from her and the plate slipped and shattered on the floor.

"Really? So you're an expert on dishwashing? I doubt you've ever had to do any housework in your life. If I wasn't here you'd both starve." she said her arms crossed looking at him sternly. While he cleaned his mess.

"You will find me quite capable in the domestic arts. I shall prove it to you. I will make breakfast for you tomorrow." he said.

"I'll believe that when I see it."

"How about a bet?" he said.

"Fine if breakfast isn't edible then you have to promote me to your lieutenant."

"Acceptable. If breakfast is to your liking then…" he got an idea and gave her a crooked smile. "Then you will marry the man of my choice instead of yours."

"You know what? I'm not worried because I know you wont be able to do it Now try not to break this one." she handed him another dish.

"I have a better idea." he put the plate down, opened a bottle of wine and poured two glasses. "I have not seen you this tense in a long time." he handed her a very full glass.

They finished the bottle long before they finished cleaning the last bowl.

"I never thought I'd see you cleaning." she said cutely, now way more relaxed.

"You would be surprised at my many talents. Let me help you with that." he pinned her from behind to the rim of the sink and put his arms over hers to assist her in drying another plate.

Feeling his growing hardness pushing against her she said… "Show me some of your other talents."

"It would be my pleasure." he answered lowering his head to her neck. His breath heating her skin. Then the bell on the Hollow detector sounded.

"You stay here. I will handle the hollow." he said leaving his body.

"I'll call Renji." she said dialing the phone.

The next morning…

"What the heck is that!" Rukia was jerked from her sleep and panicked at the sound of the smoke alarms blaring through the building. She closed her robe and left her room.

"Good morning Rukia. Breakfast will be served in a few moments." Byakuya said and Rukia sat reluctantly at the table when he pulled the chair out for her and she gave him a big smile.

"The two of you make me sick." Renji said rubbing his eyes while entering the kitchen.

"Just what are you implying Abarai?" Byakuya said.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." Renji said pouring everyone orange juice. "Hey this is actually good." Renji said surprised devouring his food.

"Don't look so smug. He'll eat anything." Rukia said poking her food with a fork. "Damn it you win." she said slamming her fork on the table.

"I am glad it is to your liking. Now for our bet." he covered the take-out containers deep in the trash with paper towels.

"You aren't going to make me go through with it are you?" she panicked.

"What is he going to make you do?" Renji asked.

"You knew it would have to happen sooner or later. Your future is now entirely in my hands." he said.

"What happen?" Renji asked confused.

"So what's your decision?" she asked and he only gave a smug smile as an answer.

That afternoon was cold and rainy. Not a good day to go out for anything. The two men had been patrolling most of the day. Byakuya insisted Rukia remain indoors. They came home in the early evening.

"I killed more hollows then him Rukia." Renji said entering the apartment soaking wet.

"While you were playing with small hollow you let several Gillian get away. You are lucky I found you when I did." Byakuya said.

"Lucky! I could have killed them all myself." Renji sneezed.

"It is a wonder to me how you were even able to do away with the hollow." Byakuya coughed.

"Damn it the both of you managed to get yourselves sick." Rukia said.

"I am not sick." Byakuya stated with another cough.

"Yes you are. Your burning up and so are you. Now to bed with both of you."

"Humans and their diseases. Really I do not know how you stand being here Rukia." Byakuya said.

"Ni-sama go to bed right now." she demanded.

Rukia went to the kitchen and poured some cans of chicken soup into a pot for the two sick men. When she served it to them she practically had to force it down their mouths.

"Rukia?"

"Yes Ni-sama?"

"Bring me some more water."

"Rukia?"

"What Renji?"

"It's too hot in here."

"Rukia."

"What now Ni-sama?"

"Are you hurrying with the water?"

"Rukia?"

"What do you want Renji?"

"Some juice would be good."

"Rukia?"

"Yes Ni-sama?"

"Come and sit with me."

"Rukia?"

"What Renji?"

"I need more juice."

"Take these pills and try to get some sleep." she said handing him the pills and placing a cool compress on his head as he started to fall asleep.

"Rukia?" Byakuya called.

"Oh what now?"

"Read to me."

"You haven't taken your medication."

"I do not need medication."

"You will take your medication now."

"I told you I do not need any medication."

"You take these pills right now or I'm going to shove them down your throat."

"Rukia that is no way for you to talk to you dear suffering brother.""Take the pills."

"No."

"Your taking them now." she got on top of him and started wrestling him in the bed.

"You will have to do better then that although your energy in bed is quite impressive."

"If only the rest of Seiretei knew you like I do." she said trying to hold him down.

"No one would ever believe you."

"Are you going to take these or not?"

"Not taking them."

"I see were going to have to do this the hard way." she lay on top of him for a moment making him go stiff at the sudden full body contact. Rukia snuck the pills into her mouth.

"Byakuya Kuchiki you've been a naughty boy." she said into his neck running her lips along his jaw and meeting his lips full on.

The second he opened his mouth for the kiss she dropped the pills in from hers. She tried to pull away but found him deepening the kiss. In one motion she was on her back and he was on top of her not releasing her mouth. Placing his hand on her neck he moved it to the side and dragged his tongue along her neck, she moaned at the contact.

"Rukia!?' Renji yelled from the other room. "Rukia!"

Byakuya had to stop what he was doing to her to both their annoyance.

"If you try that move with Abarai no one will find his remains. Oh and Rukia?"

"What?" she said trying to get out of his grasp.

"I shall see you in four hours for the next dose, although I may not wish to swallow them then either." he smiled.

"No worries Ni-sama the next pills I have to give you aren't to be taken orally anyway." she smiled smugly at his now frowning face and left the room.

The next morning everyone was well and Rukia was cooking breakfast.

"Rukia you look awful. I thought you got some sleep?" Renji said.

"Sleep? Between having to give the both of you pills all night and one of you yelling for me every half hour. I barely slept at all." she said slumped over with dark rings under her eyes.

"She did get some sleep. I watched her while she was in my room." Renji said grinning.

"What were you doing in his room Rukia? I thought you were sitting with me." Byakuya demanded.

"Well Mr. Demanding by about 4am this idiot wanted more water and I finally ended up falling asleep in that horrible chair in his room and I Ah…Ah..Ahchooo!"

"You are ill." Byakuya said.

"And whose fault is that?" she asked irritated.

"Well I can not help but feel a bit responsible for your catching my illness. Although that kiss was worth it, was it not? You should head off to bed." he said to her.

"Kiss! What the hell did that bastard do to you?" Renji yelled.

"Forget it Renji. Ok I think I will go back to bed. I just need to take your food off of the stove." she moved toward the stove and Byakuya stopped her.

"No need we can handle breakfast." Byakuya said as he watched her walk toward her room.

"I'll get you some juice Rukia." Renji called out.

"I will get her juice. Just leave Abarai." Byakuya said.

"You don't get to tell me what to do anymore." Renji shouted as the two men fought over the open container of juice.

"She is my responsibility." Byakuya said trying to get the container.

"She's my best friend." Renji said loosing his grip on the container in the struggle.

"Now look what you did. I shall again help you and get a towel." Byakuya said looking at the juice all over the floor.

"What I did! No I'll be the one to clean it up. Why don't you just leave us and go on patrol?" Renji said grabbing for the towel starting a tug of war.

"I really think you are the one who should leave." Byakuya said as they both kept tugging and finally ripped the towel in two. "Your right you should clean that up. I shall get her some pills." he said changing his mind.

The two men looked at one another then the pill bottle sitting on the counter at the other end of the kitchen then at each other again. Both darted for the pills. Grabbing for the bottle at the same time the pills flew out and littered the floor.

"Abarai, look at what your insolence made me do." Byakuya said.

"I'm picking them up." Renji crawled under the fully set table.

"Is something burning?" Byakuya asked and turned to see the pan on the stove filled with a crisp black mass under a halo of smoke.

"What?" Renji yelled as the smoke alarm went off. Hitting his head on the table, he instinctively tried to stand tilting the table and knocking all of the plates to the floor with a series of loud crashes.

Rukia got up out of her bed from all of the noise, annoyed beyond comprehension. Her mouth hung open when she saw the state of the room and the two men who had froze when they saw the anger on her face.

"I am not even going to ask what happened here." she said with a look that could kill.

"Rukia, I thought you were sleeping." Renji said as Byakuya stayed silent looking like nothing was amiss.

"The two of you have five minutes to clean this mess up before I go Bankai on both your asses." she stood there with her arms crossed and her eye twitching.

"But Rukia you haven't reached Ba…" Renji started then stopped when she gave a look that burned right through him.

The two men cleaned the room in record time, even managing to work together long enough to sweep up the broken plates.

Both men left quickly after cleaning up. Leaving Rukia to rest and get over her cold. Luckily for the two men Rukia wasn't one to hold a grudge. If anyone understood the two of them it was her and she was used to them by now. However this was the first time the three of them had ever lived together and not something she ever wanted to do again.

Renji thought it best to keep out of the house as much as possible after that crazy morning. Byakuya on the other hand, while standoffish with everyone else, only became clingier to Rukia.

"Thank you for the flowers." she sniffed the white roses but couldn't really smell anything with her cold.

"I should apologize for my behavior since we have arrived here."

"Why cant you get along with Renji? You used to get along so much better before he was promoted."

"I have been keeping something from you for some time."

"What is it?"

"Not long after he was promoted he came to me and asked for your hand. As you know before Grandfathers dying wish, I could not deny a captain that request if you agree. I told him that it would be best to delay his request until the time when you were required to marry. When he asked again six months later we argued and have not been on good terms since. I was still obligated to ask you if you wish to marry him or not and I am afraid I continued to delay his request because I feared your answer." Byakuya said.

"Is he the one your going to force me to marry for our bet?" she looked up at him with concern.

"No but again I am obligated to ask and I will respect your wishes." his hand found hers.

"What about our bet? You won the right to choose the man I'm going to marry."

"I will let you choose. I would not feel right forcing you and after our…I mean your marriage, if you still wish to be my lieutenant I will comply."

"I really have to marry right after we get back?"

"Yes, the rules state we can not wait any longer. This mission has delayed the ceremony until after we return but it can not be delayed any longer."

"It just seemed like I had longer."

"You are a noble, you may marry anyone you wish. You can choose any single man in Seiretei. No one would deny your request, of that you can be sure."

"Anyone? And they cant say no?"

"That is correct."

"Hmm there are a lot to choose from. I don't know." she said coyly.

"Really, you do not know? Then I will have to find a way to help you make up your mind. For now rest."

The next morning…

"Good Morning Rukia." Byakuya woke her and was carrying a tray.

"What is all this?" she asked still trying to figure out what was going on.

"I thought you might still be feeling sick so I made you breakfast again. Do not get up."

"Morning Rukia, what the heck Byakuya?" Renji came in with a bouquet of wild flowers.

"Morning Renji." Rukia greeted.

"I did the laundry for you and cleaned the bathrooms." Renji said eyeing Byakuya.

"That was very thoughtful of you thank you, both of you. Are we returning home today?"

"Yes around noon. Rest for now I will come for you when it is time." Byakuya said pushing Renji out of the room and closing the door on him.

"I am glad we are alone again. When we return.." he kissed her on the cheek. " I am going to enjoy this…" he kissed her on the lips. " Every day." he kissed her hard like he wanted to devour her. He wound up on top of her and they both got carried away with the moment.

"I love you Ni-sama." she said breathing heavily.

"Thank you." he said continuing to kiss any and all of her exposed flesh.

"What? Is that all you have to say?" she said pushing him away.

"What is wrong now?"

"I just confessed to you and all you can say is thank you?"

"Well I…" he tried to kiss her again.

"Stop it. Just go away. I shall be ready by the time we are to leave." she said coldly.

"Rukia?"

"I said get out!" she yelled and threw a glass at him missing him and nearly hitting Renji who opened the door at the wrong time but managed to close it so it hit the door instead.

"Rukia what the heck are the two of you fighting about?" Renji asked.

"It's nothing. I'm going out. I'll see you when it's time to go." she left quickly in a huff.

"Hang on I'll go with you." Renji said hurrying after her leaving Byakuya confused as to what just happened.

The return home…

"I'm so happy to see you Ai, and you Akikio, and you Kimi." Rukia hugged her maids.

"Were happy to see you too miss."

"Was your trip to the living world good?"

"Well it was something alright, but I wanted to let all of you know how much I appreciate you and all that you do for us. I need to go see the kitchen staff and thank them before I settle back in." Rukia said running to the kitchen.

"What go into her?" Akiko asked.

"You know how difficult the master is." Kimi said.

"Yeah all that time without servants, at least our jobs are secure." Ai said.

Rukia had exactly six days to choose a husband. On the sixth day she had to announce her choice. She did promise her grandfather that she would be unbiased in her choice and give everyone a fair shot. But she had to narrow it down somehow. There were just too many to choose from. One thing was for sure, she wasn't going to pick someone who couldn't even say I love you.

It wasn't out of character for lots of people to want to cash in on the Kuchiki wealth. It was very true no single male in Seiretei would say no to marrying into the Kuchiki family. The gifts started arriving almost immediately after her return and there was already a whole slew of them piling up from when the announcement was originally made. All kinds of gifts boxes of every size arrived. There were enough flowers to choke a person to death with the smell. Rukia had her maids list all of the names of the people with what they had sent her so she could write thank you notes.

There was a mob of men outside of the manor trying to gain an audience with Rukia.

"What is going on outside?" Byakuya said looking uninterested.

"Um I think they are my suitors." she said self assured smiling.

"I will put an end to this." he said going to the front door.

When he stepped outside he scared nearly everyone away that saw him. The men in the back who didn't see him also started scattering because General Yamamoto had come to visit the family.

"This has caused quite a stir." Yamamoto said.

"Yes It is a disgrace what is occurring."

"Well now I wouldn't go that far. Rukia is quite a girl."

"General?" Byakuya asked confused. The old man had never taken much of an interest in Rukia before.

"I was wondering if you would give this to her for me." he handed Byakuya a small box wrapped in gold. Byakuya was just stunned.

"I'll be going now. Do tell her I was asking about her." Yamamoto said.

"Rukia there is a hell butterfly with a message for you from Ukitake-taicho." Ai said.

"I will take the message." Byakuya intervened.

'If you are unable to find a suitable husband, please consider me I will make sure you are well taken care of.' Ukitake' message said and continued with the voice of Kyoraku 'Eh don't forget about me Rukia-chan, I'll make a much more active husband then Jushiro.'

"I have had enough of this you will choose now." Byakuya demanded of Rukia.

"Now, now Ni-sama I did make a promise and there are so many to choose from. I think I'll go on a few dates first."

"You will do no such thing."

"There is something that will help me make up my mind." she crossed her arms.

"Not this again Rukia. Do not make me."

"You know what I want to hear." she said.

"I am not going to play games with you Rukia. You are aware of my feelings."

"I don't know why it's so difficult for you to say. It looks like I'm just going to have to find someone else to choose."

"Rukia!"

"If I'm going to choose a husband I want him to be really nice. Oh and handsome too. I wonder what lieutenant Hisagi is doing right now?" she said making him really angry.

"Rukia so help me I am…"

"You'll what?" she asked snottily.

"I am going to my study."

"Have a good day." she waved and smiled at him very reminiscent of an Ichimaru Gin.

"The Shinigami Men's Association would like you to narrow your choices to lesson some of the chaos. We can have a contest if you like. Only please give us some indication of your choice." said the president of the SMA on the phone.

Rukia thought she might have a little fun with this. "Ok Well considering how powerful all of my friends are I will narrow it down to people who are from any of the noble families or ranked higher then a lieutenant. I will further narrow it down as the days pass. I think a contest of some sort would be a good idea. You know there is this type of TV show in the living world where people find mates out of a large group. I never cared for it but I believe it will work. Let me explain…" and she went on to explain how a reality dating show worked.

"Thank you for letting us know I will relay the message to everyone eligible and set it up with the television station. Oh and did you like the kimono I sent?"

"Yes thank you. It was thoughtful. Good bye." she hung up.

Rukia thought of the best way to make this look like a fair decision. If she didn't there was going to be a riot. She knew who she wanted to choose but it was so much more fun this way and she wanted to get him back.

There were five available men from the noble families who fit her criteria.

Nobles, captains, and lieutenants all gathered in the mansion.

"Good Morning. Is everyone aware this is being televised? Good. I have four days left to make a choice. Since there are a lot of you, I want to make a fair choice. I will only be able to spend a half hour with each of you. I am bound by the rules I agreed to, to give all of you a fair chance. After reading everyone's profiles and having a quick chat with all of you. I have narrowed it down to eleven. I will say the names of the people who are to compete."

"Abarai Renji, Shiba Ganju, Shigekuni Yamamoto-Genryūsai, Izuru Kira, Shunsui Kyōraku, Ukitake Jushiro, Shūhei Hisagi, Tōshirō Hitsugaya, Kenpachi Zaraki, Mayuri Kurotsuchi, and…"

"I am going to kill you Rukia." Byakuya said as everyone turned to look at him.

"Ah yes we cant forget the last Kuchiki Byakuya. Don't worry everyone it's just a formality. I would like to thank the rest of you for coming, I enjoyed our brief meetings. I would also like to thank Soi Fon personally for coming, you are right there shouldn't be a male bias however please forgive me as I am required to bare children immediately." Rukia said.

"What like a real one?" Hisagi asked.

"Yes a real one." Rukia answered.

"An army of children can be cloned if you wish." Kurotsuchi said.

"I'll um keep that in mind taicho. Let's begin with the interviews." Rukia said.

Rukia sat at a two chaired table and spent a half hour interview with each one and scribbled notes like crazy. It was her first time speed dating.

Yamamoto…

"Well your resume is certainly the most impressive. It says here you like to give tea ceremonies."

"Yes every month. I am afraid it has been a while since I have seen you at one."

"Ni-sama likes to keep me out of social functions if he not there with me. Have you been married before?"

"It was an eon ago."

"Your age is a concern."

"Yes however I can teach you a lot more then these children can."

"That is true, that a man of your age must be as skilled outside of the battlefield as in."

"I will not disappoint."

Renji…

"So who is your favorite artist?"

"What? Art, Rukia?" Renji said.

"I see."

"Hey what are you writing down?"

"So how would you feel about living with my brother for the first year?"

"What! An entire year! I'd go insane and kill myself."

"So have you read any good books lately?"

"You know I don't read much. What's this about living with your psycho brother?"

Ganju

"Have you reached Bankai?"

"Not yet."

"I see."

"What do you do on your spare time?"

"I have this gang and we raise pigs."

"Pigs? I see."

Izuru…

"Is it true you are the last of a noble family?"

"Yes."

"It says here you like to write Haiku."

"Yes."

"Will you read me one of your poems?"

"The persimmon tree bears fruit. Aaah, the persimmon tree bears fruit again this year. I won an award for that one."

"Do you like persimmon?"

"No."

Hitsugaya…

"Well we both share an ice sword, there's a start." she said.

"Uhuh."

"Um…so…What do you do for fun?"

"Fun? I am constantly left with little time for such things thanks to my lieutenant."

"Um ok so how old are you?"

"*growls*"

"Ok then…so…" she looked at the walls and the ceiling looking for something to say. She commented Mr. personality in her notebook.

Hisagi…

"Is there something about yourself you would like to tell me about?"

"I can take care of your needs baby." Hisagi said.

"How do you feel about one thousand years of monogamy."

"huh." he said running for the door.

"Looks like I lost one."

Byakuya…

"Rukia this is ridiculous." Byakuya said.

"I see and are you always this disagreeable?"

"What are you writing down, let me see that now. Is that supposed to be me." he pointed at a frowning bunny in a hayori with the number six on it.

"I'll be asking the questions." she said taking her book back.

"Turn that camera off, now." he demanded.

"But sir." the camera man said as Byakuya got up and drew his sword.

Kurotoshi

"Tell me about your hobbies?"

"My work is my hobby. I enjoy experimenting on interesting subjects and reading the Seiretei Communication."

"What would make you a good husband for me?"

" I am a very suitable mate. I think I would like to clone you so you would not have to do all of the wife's duties. I will need you to assist me. It would be beneficial if you transferred to my division."

"You already have one child?"

"She is not my biological child per se she is mostly a gigai with my blood that I made. She has proven most useful."

"Oh..um… well isn't that clever of you."

Kenpachi…

"Describe yourself in five words."

"I like to kill…1234 people that's five isn't it?"

"Um yeah.

"Your awfully tiny. I'd end up cracking you in half and we would have to do something about your reliance on Kido."

"I don't think were going to work but… would you like to help me piss my brother off?"

"I'm listening…"

Kyoraku…

"So what brings you here?"

"I cant pass up a chance with a beautiful woman."

"captain." she blushed.

"It's true I can certainly make a lovely girl like yourself reach all sorts of levels of pleasure."

"captain!" she blushed harder.

"You wont find me so lazy where it's important."

"captain!" she was blushing like mad.

Ukitake…

"So what qualities do you look for in a wife?"

"I have to say I do miss the way you used to take care of me. I am unwell and probably unsuitable for your needs. But thank you for choosing me in your top picks. If you haven't anyone in mind I volunteer myself to do with as you please.""You're the best Taicho. How are things back at the thirteenth? I miss everyone since I transferred to the sixth."

After the first round of interviews…

"Ok after thinking it over and it was such a tough decision as all of you are so wonderful in your own way. The names of the people I call will be eliminated. Shiba Ganju, Ukitake Jushiro, Kurotoshi Mayuri, Hitsugaya Toshiro, Izuru Kira and …Shūhei Hisagi. The rest of you I find compatible in some way or other so let' continue this in the morning. Have a good night."

"Can I still have some DNA?" Kurotoshi asked.

"No." she said looking freaked.

"Rukia this is ridiculous." Byakuya said.

"I think you said that already. I thought it best to give everyone a fair chance since there were so many suitors and I really don't know everyone that well. I wouldn't want to pick the wrong person."

"Rukia end this." he demanded.

"That depends do you have something you want to say to me?" she asked waiting to hear three little words he refused to say.

"Yes." he said.

"Well." she waited.

"Good night." he said.

"Stand here and greet everyone. Just read from the cards if you forget your lines. This is live so do your best. This is the biggest thing to hit soul society since Aizen . There are millions of people inside and out of Seiretei glued to the television to find out your choice. " the director said.

"Do people really care that much?" Rukia asked.

" Yes we didn't have any drop in ratings for the entire twenty one hours we aired yesterday. Ready? three, two, one, action." the director said.

"Good morning everyone. There are three days left and five of you. So today I can spend more time with my top choices. I can spend three hours with each of you. You have all been given a randomly drawn time so we can stay on schedule and activities are structured so everyone has equal ability to react naturally. Thank you all for you patience. Lets begin." she said enjoying it way too much.

"I do believe I am to go first." Yamamoto said.

"Ah general It is my pleasure."

"Oh no the pleasure is all mine Rukia-chan." he said

"I am going to kill her." Byakuya said to Renji.

"Yeah yeah don't worry your going to get eliminated tonight. I have Rukia' favorite stuff planned as a surprise." Renji said.

"You clean up nicely Zaraki." Kyoraku said.

"It took twenty members of my division and kidnapping someone from the fourth to figure out how to tie this tie." Kenpachi said.

"My my Byakuya Zaraki really went all out for our Rukia." Kyoraku said.

"She is not your Rukia." Byakuya said.

"Me and Rukia get along really well it's just too bad I'm going to be stuck with him as my brother in law." Kenpachi pointed at Byakuya.

"No such thing will ever happen." he said.

"Don't be so sure Kuchiki. She comes to my division all of the time for lunch and she always says how she admires my strength and wants me to personally train her."

"She never said any such thing."

"Didn't she?"

"It is time we finish our fight."

"Anytime Kuchiki."

"Now now everyone lets relax. We do not have much time and should plan it accordingly." Kyoraku interrupted.

Fifteen hours later…

"Three, two, one action." came the director.

"Well again thank you all for being here with me. I had a wonderful time with each and everyone of you but I will have to eliminate two of you as tomorrow will be my last day to spend time with the remaining three and then I will have to announce my choice. You have no idea how difficult it was to choose as I have come to be very fond of all of you. Without any further ado the two I have chosen to eliminate are… "

"Cut to commercial." the director yelled.

"Do we have commercials here?" Rukia asked.

"Yes this television thing is really catching on in soul society." he said.

"_Do you like fighting? Well of course you do. That's why you need Shinigami Juice. The only juice to help you improve your stamina to keep you fighting all day long. Sleep? You don't need it with Shinigami Juice. Yes Shinigami Juice kill hollow in record time with Shinigami Juice. Shinigami Juice Shinigami Juice Shinigami Juice. In Cherry, Orange, and Grape. Warning this drink is not to be taken internally, any incidences of blindness, death or hollowfication are purely coincidental. Use as directed."_

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"Ready and three, two, one, and action." the director said.

"The two I have chosen to eliminate tonight are…Kyoraku Taicho and Yamamoto Sou Taicho."

"Oh well, I guess I'll have to keep working on Nano-chan." Kyoraku said.

"I still expect you to tea next month, without your brother." Yamamoto said.

"I'll be there. Ok everyone get some sleep, tomorrow is our last day together and I have to split it between the three of you." Rukia said.

"and… cut." the director said.

The last morning…

"Looks like the order is Kenpachi, Abarai, and Ni-sama." she said.

"How is that fair?" Renji said.

"Yeah you get to go home with him so he gets to spend the rest of the night with you." Kenpachi said.

"Well I do guess we should avoid any bias. Why don't the two of you stay here in the mansion tonight?"

"Rukia!" Byakuya said angrily.

"You don't mind do you? It is so important for you to follow the rules."

"I thought we were over that." Byakuya said.

"It'd be pretty hard for me to get over someone trying to kill me just so they could follow the rules." Renji said.

"Shut up Abarai." Byakuya said.

"Make me." he said.

"She's as good as mine." Kenpachi said confidently making both men look at him angrily.

Rukia spent the morning with Kenpachi mostly plotting to make Byakuya' miserable. The afternoon with Renji, which was always interesting and the evening with Byakuya.

"I thought you would have more sense then choosing Kenpachi as one of your final three."

"Your right I must be crazy. I did choose you over Hisagi and Izaru."

"You should just give this up now. We both know who your choice will be." Byakuya said too confidently.

"Your awfully confident about my choice. You think you have me all figured out don't you?"

"Rukia we have been together a life time there is nothing you can do that will surprise me."

"Really? Well then you should know how persuasive Renji can be."

"What exactly does that mean?"

"He kissed me you know for all the world to see."

"If his lips came anywhere near yours…"

"I'm probably going to choose him. It's better I choose someone who can reply with an I love you too when someone confesses their love for you, instead of saying thank you and looking confused."

"How many times do I have to say I am sorry?" he said.

"That's not what I want to hear. Why can't you just say it?"

"Rukia I do not wish to speak of this again."

"Your so stubborn. Fine. I'm choosing Renji or Zaraki tomorrow and there is nothing you can do about it."

"You will not get ten feet to the front door if you do."

"I'm tired of your threats and I'm tired of you!" she yelled. "and that damn camera!"

"Rukia…"

"I'm going to bed good night." she slid her door shut on everyone.

"You must have really pissed her off Kuchiki." Kenpachi said standing next to Renji who both arrived in time to hear her yell good night and slam her door in his face.

"I'll go and speak to her." Renji said.

"No I will. You've had enough time with her." Kenpachi said.

"Neither of you will be entering her bedroom." Byakuya said.

"I'll see whomever I want." Rukia yelled from the other side of the door. "Zaraki-san meet me in the garden."

"Seems like you lost Kuchiki." he said leaving for the garden.

"Do whatever you want. Just keep your filthy hands off of her." Byakuya said going to his room and slamming his sliding door loudly.

"He makes me so mad." Rukia said sitting on the roof next to Kenpachi.

"I've never seen him that angry. He's about to break. This is so much fun." he said.

"How can I choose him if he's going to be like that?"

"There's always Renji. The both of them have lost their heads over you… I say ditch them both. We could have a lot more fun together." he said laughing.

"I have my plan for tomorrow."

"I'm listening. Anything to annoy that brother of yours." he said.

The next day…

"Good morning Renji, Zaraki." she said happily. "and Ni-sama." she said angrily. "Since I still have a few hours before I have to choose I'm going to give the three of you a task to complete. The one who brings me the most romantic gift is the one I will choose. You have until seven pm to complete this task that's ten hours starting now. Better hurry."

"Oh my god what am I going to buy her! I need money." Renji said panicking.

"Rukia gave me money so I can get her something nice." Kenpachi said.

"She gave you money? Have you no shame you barbarian." Byakuya said.

"Don't get pissy because your going to lose this one. I know exactly what I'm going to get her." Kenpachi said.

7:03pm Rukia received the three gifts in her room while the three men waited in the main hall for her decision. Renji paced the room nervously while Byakuya and Kenpachi played cards calmly. The director suggested she open them live on camera so she complied.

"All right I am here to make my decision." she said walking into the room. Renji froze where he was pacing. Byakuya stood up and Kenpachi smiled.

"Well now Kenpachi' gift is most unique. He bought me my own star. It was a very romantic choice. Thank you." she said giving the giant a hug.

"Renji, It's obvious no one knows me better then you do. She held up a Chappy plushy and pressed its belly as it began to sing in Renji' bad recorded voice. "Your voice recorded singing that song we used to as kids is something I will treasure forever. Thank You." she hugged him, nearly in tears from the thoughtful gift.

"Top that." Renji said to Byakuya who stood still not changing his normal expression.

"I am most surprised at your gift Ni-sama. A single rose with a note attached. Shall I read it out loud?"

"That will not be necessary." he said.

"Just a flower and a note. Did you even try?" Renji said.

"It's probably just a sappy poem." Kenpachi said.

"Lets see.

'Dear Rukia,

There was no point in buying you anything. You have always been given anything you desire of me. I have, and will continue, to share everything I have with you. I should have confessed to you sooner, it is my own fallacy. You have put up with my stubborn and cold behavior for so long, I am sorry I did not say the words you wanted to hear. I thought my actions would be enough, but it was my own cowardice that stopped me and brought us to this situation. So I shall say it now. I love you and implore you to choose me to spend the rest of your life with. If you decide on someone else then I will have to slice them to pieces. No one will take you from me while there is still a breath in my body.'"

"Pfth" Kenpachi began laughing then Renji began laughing. The two men were practically hysterical. While Byakuya stood there inwardly ready to kill but looking like the situation was boring.

"Can you guys stop laughing for a moment so I can tell you my decision."

"Fine. Pft. Sorry." Kenpachi said.

"Well Abarai Renji step forward. You've been my best friend for most of my life. I love you deeply and should not have dragged you into this in the first place. Forgive me. I can not choose you." she hugged him for a while.

"Well that leaves me with the two of you. Zaraki you've been a great friend and fun companion. Byakuya-sama your always there for me."

He looked at her, she looked at him. It might have been a flash of nervousness on his face but it was quickly replaced with a death glare about ready to snap.

"It's such a hard decision. I really like the both of you." she said making Byakuya twitch.

"Rukia I will make good on my threat." Byakuya said.

"Don't let him threaten you. I'm more then a match. It's your choice not his." Kenpachi said.

"As I recall I won the rights to your decision, did I not?"

"Yes you did."

"Then I will decide for you, we are leaving."

"You know I would never forgive you if you forced me." she said pulling away from him.

"Then choose now!" he demanded.

"Fine my choice is…"

"Cut to commercial." the director said.

"_Shingami Juice, Shinigami Juice still for sale, still for sale. The zombies were just a lie made up by our competitors. Shinigami Juice, Shinigami Juice. "_

"I am through with this game. Scatter." he said blowing up the camera and other equipment and chasing the director and other staff out of the room. Kenpachi was having a blast watching the man flip.

"You will choose me now." he demanded.

"Did you really think I would pick anyone else? It took long enough to break that stubborn pride of yours." she said laughing at him.

"You just wait until I get you in the bedroom, you are going to be punished." he said embracing her.

"Promises, promises." she said meeting his lips for a quick kiss as they both smiled.


	9. Misguided Romance

Misguided Romance.

Senbonzakura and Sode no Shirayuki need to get their masters together but don't know the first think about romance, although they think they do. T rating. Enjoy.

"She hates me I have to do something. What to do what to do." Senbonzakura said to himself shunpoing around the garden. "Aha!" he said picking a flower in his large gloved hand while standing in front of the lake.

"Good evening Senbonzakura-dono." Sode no Shirayuki approached from behind and placed a hand on Senbonzakura' shoulder.

"Sode no Shirayuki!" he jumped, fumbled with something in his hands and hid it behind his back.

"I'm sorry did I startle you?" she said.

"No um…um." he said trying to hide his back from view.

"What do you have behind your back." she asked.

"Here. I was going to give this to you later." he handed her a blue flower.

"That was very thoughtful of you." she said taking it with a demure smile.

"Please forgive me for asking the master to kill you. I did not think he would. I was extremely upset when you broke and I thought I would never see you again." he said bowing.

"We have been under the same roof for many years. There is no need for forgiveness. I can sense your remorse." she said motioning for him to stop bowing.

"I promise to protect you with all of the strength I have." he said.

"Senbonzakura-dono why does it matter if I forgive you?"

"I, well its because…I…" he took her by surprise and kissed her quickly on the lips.

"Senbonzakura-dono!"

"I'm sorry I could not help it." he said.

"Why did you kiss me?"

"Because I wanted to, I'm sorry if I offended you."

"No I was just surprised and well it was a bit uncomfortable with your mask on."

"Oh right. I did not think to…" he stopped talking when she began to remove his mask her eyes looking up into his.

"Perhaps if you were to try again." she said and he took her in his arms and gave her a full passionate kiss that glowed pink and white at the meeting of their lips.

"What if the lord and lady catch us?" she said resting in his arms.

" He will be mad if his feelings become known. We are to hide those feelings at all costs but it becomes more difficult for him as the days pass and they become closer."

"Rukia-sama will not let those feelings surface. She struggles greatly with the guilt. I fear she may seek comfort with another to distract herself." she said.

"No! Who? It can not happen!"

"I suppose it will be alright. We have tolerated Zabimaru this long then there is the possibility of Zengatsu. Although I think of him as a son because he had partly come from me. I do not wish to be with either of them, if I have a choice. Our masters are the only way we can be together. When we lose this form we may never touch again." she said.

"I will not let that happen. We must do something." he said.

"But how? You know how stubborn and dutiful the two of them are."

"I shall think of something. We will have to figure out human mating rituals. For now I do not wish to leave your side." he said.

"I have a magazine Rukia gave me. It talks about being romantic. It says if a man gets jealous he likes you and it says to surprise things for one another like writing letters and giving unique gifts….oh and doing something spontaneous to say I love you."

"Then that is what we shall do."

Later…

"Good night Ni-sama, sleep well." Rukia said.

"Thank you Rukia. Be sure to join me for breakfast, good night." Byakuya said.

"Um Ni-sama aren't you going to take him with you?" she said pointing at Senbonzakura who was already in Rukia' bed.

"I think it best for your safety that he stays with you. Do with him as you wish." Byakuya spoke without thinking then regretting the last sentence.

Rukia tried to sleep with Sode no Shirayuki on one side and Senbonzakura on the other. The room was freezing and Senbonzakura snored loudly. It was driving her crazy. She tried to push Senbonzakura over and she struggled for the covers that were half frozen.

Three A.M. rolled around and she still hadn't fallen asleep because of the cold and the noise. On top of it Senbonzakua and Sode no Shirayuki called one another's names in their sleep. It was becoming too much.

"I can't take it anymore." she grabbed her pillow and stormed into Byakuya' room.

"Rukia are you well? What is the matter?" he panicked as she threw her pillow down next to him.

"I'm f…f…freezing my butt off t…t…thanks to Shirayuki, and you well if you snore like he does I'm going to k…k…kill you." her teeth were chattering as she lay her head down.

"Rukia!" he was shocked at her abrupt contact. "Well you are rather cold." he said putting his arms around her shivering form to warm her.

"T…T…Thanks." she said warming.

The next morning Byakuya and Rukia were up early, preparing for the day. Neither Senbonzakura or Shirayuki noticed Rukia gone and woke up in one another's arms.

"She must have woken early and let us sleep. It is a good thing no one saw us this way." she said.

"I want to stay here longer." he said kissing her.

"We have much work to do if we are to get our masters together." she said.

"I have an idea." he said.

The two of them peeked in the dining room and watched their masters eating breakfast. They were both laughing and talking. Then the two swords entered the room and sat down.

"Rukia is quite a catch. I bet she will be marrying that lieutenant soon." Senbonzakura blurted out and everyone looked at him, but he paid them no attention. Rukia blushed from embarrassment.

"I do not approve." Byakuya said and everyone turned to look at him.

"And what do you have against Renji?" Rukia asked.

"He is not worthy of your affection and I will not allow it."

"You wont allow it? I hardly think you are in any position to dictate who I see or don't see."

"Rukia remember your place. When I decide you are ready for marriage I will choose your husband and you will comply."

"You…will choose…my husband! Comply? You can be such an ass sometimes." she got up and walked out of the room.

"Rukia I will not tolerate that behavior from you. I am head of this house." he said following her as they began to argue in the hallway.

"I guess that didn't work Senbonzakura-sono." Shirayuki said.

"We are just going to have to try something else." he reached out for her.

"Why don't we spend the morning in the garden where we can be alone?" she said leaving with him.

"There is a spot under a Sakura where I wish to make love to you."

"Senbonzakura-dono your so forward."

"Unlike my master I am incapable of waiting for what I want. We can try to get them together again later."

"Let's send a gift to her office first. What should we get?"

"It has to be something that says manly, but says I like you."

"How about a book? Rukia likes books." she said.

"A love story. Let's look. We have to get something that implies love and marriage and manliness."

Rukia found a box in her office that had a card from her brother. She thought it was a make up gift for the argument in the morning so she opened it, found the book and read the title '120 Days Of Sodom by the Marquis De Sade.' she flipped open the book and began reading. Skipping all of her morning work she read every disturbing line.

Each description of rape, incest, abuse, and torture by noble men made her shudder. It was a strange choice for her brother to have made and it was odd of him to send her something so graphic. She wondered what he was trying to say by sending her such a book. She was so engrossed in the book that she didn't notice the bouquet of flowers on the table behind her desk that her brother had really sent.

Lunch came and Byakuya went to the 13th division to apologize to Rukia, over a cozy picnic, for the incident at breakfast. Rukia thought it best not to mention the book as she would have not been able to hide her embarrassment after reading the content.

"Did you get my gift?" he asked.

"Yes um…thank you. It was thoughtful." she looked away feeling weird.

"Rukia I am sorry for what has transpired between us this morning. I did not mean what I said. Just the thought of you marrying someone else angers me." he slipped up by saying that but her mind was so over worked by the book that she let it go.

"So you wont force me to marry someone against my will?" she asked.

"No. I only hope you choose who I have in mind for you." he looked into her eyes.

"And who is that?" she blushed under his intense gaze but did not look away.

"Rukia there is something I have been wanting to say to you for some time. I did not think I would find myself this nervous but will you…"

"Rukia-sama. There you are. Senbonzakura and I wanted to give you this bottle of Sake." Shirayuki interrupted.

"I brought glasses for all of us." Senbonzakura said.

Dinner…

"Did you see the two of them? They are no closer to getting together." Shirayuki said.

"Yes they both looked so angry. We got there just in time before they started arguing again." Senbonzakura said.

"We will just have to try again."

"We better not leave them alone for dinner or they may argue again." he said.

"Good idea."

The night had gone the same as the last one did, with Shirayuki freezing the room, Senbonzakura snoring and Rukia leaving for Byakuya' room.

The next day the two swords were up to the same thing, trying to get their masters together using their limited knowledge of human romance.

"I have an idea. We should do something for Rukia and say it was from him." Senbonzakura said.

"I wonder what." Shirayuki said.

"It has to be good so they will confess." he said.

"I have an idea." she said.

Senbonzakura and Shirayuki went to Rukia' room with the intent of painting her wall with something that would say I love you.

"This is all the paint I could find." she said holding out a very tiny container of red paint and a somewhat larger black one.

"Master is the best artist. I hope my work will not be any different."

"Yes Rukia really admires his work." she said.

" What should we paint on the wall?"

"I do not know but it should show how he feels."

"Let's see this book is rather suggestive. K..Kama Sutra. Well it does show what we want to say. Here's a book about cave drawings. It shows this stick guy killing a large beast play by play. But I do not know how to make that say I love you." she said.

"I know what to draw!" he started making several sets of stick figures in the most suggestive pornographic poses. They strangely resembled Rukia and Byakuya. The only one not pornographic was the one with the dark haired male strangling a male with long red hair who had the letter X where his eyes should have been.

Sode no Shirayuki covered her eyes. "Didn't you draw that a little too large?" she said pointing to the male stick figure with a very overly exaggerated penis.

"It only suggests the masters manliness. Women like that." he said.

"Oh. Hey we still have some red paint left." she said as he took it from her and began painting.

"There." he said as they both looked at the black figures in compromising poses with a large red heart with black streaks around the whole thing dripping down a bit.

"Wow you are a good artist." she said.

"Yep this has love written all over it. No woman could resist this masterpiece." he said standing tall.

"We should find Rukia-sama." she said.

"Rukia come and see what the master left in your room for you." Senbonzakura said.

"Yes I think you will be pleasantly surprised." Shirayuki said.

"What the?" Rukia stood there staring at the wall with her mouth hanging open.

It was the most perverted and psychotic looking painting she had ever seen. She recognized who the characters were supposed to be and they were in the most lewd and indecent poses she had ever seen, not to mention one scene showing the gruesome death of who she believed to be Renji. Then she remembered their argument about Renji. She was scared to death. To her it wasn't a declaration of love, to her it was a threat by a psycho stalker.

Byakuya had never behaved that way before. Although he was known to be very protective and controlling and there were some strange behaviors over the years. 'How could I have missed it all of these years. He was always so quiet. I never thought these things were going on in his mind. It's so creepy. Then there was that creepy book he sent me. He's definitely trying to tell me something but what? It is a pretty good picture. He's the best artist but this is, maybe it's avant-garde. I know I just wont bring it up.'

"I knew she would be speechless." Senbonzakura said and Shirayuki nodded.

Later that evening….

"They're just in there talking and playing that game. Why are they not mating?" he said.

"I don't know we did everything the magazine said. This is harder then we thought." she said.

"I do not see what the difficulty is, if you find the woman you want to be with you just tell her and then you mate."

"I wonder if it is more complicated for them since they are not swords."

"How difficult could it be? What did we forget to do?"

"We didn't write a love letter." she said.

"I shall use my superior skills in calligraphy to write the best love poem in history." he said.

"We should hurry."

"What to write what to write?" he said.

"We should talk about her features like her eyes and hair and things she likes."

"Ah yes _Rukia your eyes are purple like bunnies."_

"Excuse me Senbonzakura-dono but bunnies are not purple."

"It's too late now I can not erase it. She wont mind. Women like that mushy artistic stuff."

"If you say so Senbonzakura-dono, you always know best."

"Where was I? Oh yeah. _Rukia your eyes are purple like bunnies. You hair is black like my Shinigami robe when it isn't covered in the blood of my slain enemy."_

"You should find a way to tell her how strong h. is. She is really impressed by his strength."

"Ok. _I am a virile man who needs to drop his seed in you. I will love you vigorously day and night. My stamina can be matched by no other." _

"Oh and you should say how much he cant live without her, and children. Everyone loves children."

"I did not take you for a romantic." he said.

"Is that what romantic is?" she asked.

"Yes that is what is important to women. I have a few more things to write then we should hurry and get this to Rukia." he said scribbling down a few more lines.

"Rukia-sama are you here?" Shirayuki asked.

"What do you two want?" she said trying to replace the pornographic pictures on her paper wall with new paper before anyone could see them.

"The master wishes for you to have this poem he wrote for you." Senbonzakura said.

Rukia read the poem out loud. " '_Rukia your eyes are purple like bunnies. You hair is black like my Shinigami robe when it isn't covered in the blood of my slain enemy. Your smile reminds me of a hollow about to eat a human. I will buy you many kimono._ _I am a virile man who needs to drop his seed in you. I will love you vigorously day and night. My stamina can be matched by no other. Do not worry I am potent and can impregnate you with many children. Babies will be healthy and attractive. If you do not mate with me I will be forced to lock you in the house. I will slaughter any man you try to be with and I would rather we both die together then be apart. You know I am serious about all I say.' _Will the two of you excuse me, I need to see Ni-sama, I don't think he is well." Rukia said really concerned.

"Oh I hope he isn't ill." Shirayuki said.

"See she liked the poem. It was just an excuse to see him." he said.

"Oh."she said as they waited for the result.

"Um…Ni-sama? Can we talk about something?"

"Sure Rukia anything you wish."

"Have you been feeling well lately?"

"I am fine, why do you ask?"

"Well I guess you did say you were fine being so virile and all."

"What? Rukia?" Byakuya said.

"Well this poem you wrote for me."

"Oh you found that." he said referring to some of the poems he had written her and hid in his desk.

"Yeah well it was very…um thoughtful."

"I may not be the best poet but I meant every word of what I said. I have been trying to tell you those things for a very long time." he moved closer to her.

"Oh yeah I…um." she moved away as he got closer. Then she found herself trapped in a corner with nowhere to run. "I need to think about it. I should go to bed." she said.

"Take all the time you need Rukia. But be sure I will keep trying."

Ok he was really creeping her out at this point and she was panicking. ' This is Ni-sama what am I thinking. He just has a really twisted sense of love. I guess it's kind of sweet in a psycho stalkerish sort of way. It's not like he would ever hurt me, I think. I'm really over reacting on this, he probably had too much Sake when he wrote that poem. You know I haven't seen him with a woman I bet he's just frustrated, that's it. But if it keeps up were really going to have to have a talk about limits.' she thought.

Bed time…

Rukia lay in between the two swords pretending to sleep but getting angrier by the second.

"You think she's still awake?" he whispered over Rukia' head.

"No she's sleeping." she whispered

"Do you think she liked the book we got for her?"

"I'm sure she did."

"Did you see her face when she saw our painting and the poem. They will mate for sure."

"I never knew you were so knowledgeable about romance Senbonzakura."

"I missed you earlier." he said.

"We were only parted for a few hours."

"It is too long for me."

"Senbonzakura."

"Sode no Shirayuki."

They started kissing over Rukia' head. She didn't care that they were kissing. It seemed they were never going to let her sleep again. At least she found out that it wasn't Byakuya who did those creepy things.

It took only moments before she was getting smashed between the two figures who were unable to keep their hands off of one another. So she wiggled her way out from the bottom of the futon and stormed into her brothers room.

"Rukia are you alright?" Byakuya asked.

"You come with me." she said taking him by the wrist and dragging him out of the bed.

"Rukia it's the middle of the night. If they are making noise you can just stay in my room again." he said.

"Noise isn't the problem." she slid the door open slightly so he could peak in. "Look at that."

"What are they? Oh. I did not know they could…I do not want you watching this…"

"I wasn't planning on watching. What are you going to do about it?" she demanded.

"This." he captured her lips and picked her up to take her back to his room.

The next morning…

"Rukia has agreed to be my wife." Byakuya said.

"See I told you all of our work would pay off." Senbonzakura said.

"Your so smart Senbonzakura-dono." she said making him fill with pride.


	10. Here There Everywhere

Turned out longer then expected. Comedy, crack. Beware Smut rated M. Rukia and Byakuya cant keep their hands off of one another then the unthinkable happens, something keeps stopping them from having sex. Bya/Ruki Ichi/Hime

Here, There, Everywhere

"Could you try not to scare the kids in my class half to death today." Rukia said.

"I do not know what you mean Rukia." Byakuya said unconcerned.

"Really? All the girls are in love with you and the boys are scared senseless. I don't know why Urahara couldn't find you something else to do besides being my teacher, of all jobs. It's really distracting."

"I am required to stay close to you. What else would I do here anyway?"

"As I recall you were the one who insisted on being so close to me and…. I don't know…. you could do that." she pointed at a hot male model on a billboard and started looking starry eyed.

"Really Rukia I am hardly qualified for that kind of job. It is far from appropriate for a noble. Rukia did you hear me? Stop staring at the billboard or I will take out Senbonzakura and reduce it to ash. I just said…"

"I heard you, and you are more then qualified. Although you might have to smile." she said eyeing him up and down with her arms crossed.

"Do I not smile enough?" he turned to her with a look of concern.

"I have only ever seen you half smile. I doubt you can even do it." she dared him.

"I would but it has a certain effect on those around me."

"Yeah like scaring them half to death." she laughed.

"I will have to show you." he gave her a huge sexy smile and she nearly feinted. "So you now understand why I do not often smile. It will cause work delays." he said looking down at her.

"Don't act so smug. It wasn't that great." she looked up at him.

"Really? Then why am I holding you?"

"I must have slipped." she said as he helped her stand up straight.

"Is it really standard for students to wear their skirts so short? Can you not wear something else?" he said looking at her exposed legs then turning back around to walk away.

"Ni-sama you know this is the school uniform and everyone wears it like this. You didn't complain yesterday." she said hurrying to walk next to him.

"I do not approve of the way the other males and that one female in your class look at you. I may have to put them in their place."

"You worry too much. They're just innocent teenagers."

"Rukia I often wonder how someone just twenty years younger then me could be so naïve. Male teenagers or males in general are far from innocent. If you had any idea what we are thinking about when we look at you…" he said as he stopped pushed her up against a brick fence, ran his hands all the way up her bare thighs pressed himself between her legs, then tugged at her skirt.

"Ni-sama! Were in public you know, god when did you turn into such a perv. "

"I just wanted to see if the skirt could be made longer. I was mistaken." he said like nothing out of the ordinary just happened. "Rukia you are not wearing anything underneath that skirt, you shall have to be punished for that kind of behavior." he whispered in her ear.

"Ni-sama!" she blushed as he let her down.

"As I was saying, I will not tolerate any of those adolescents with their perverted thoughts ogling you." he said walking ahead of her again.

"So all men are thinking the same thing about me?" she said walking just a few feet behind him.

"That is correct." he stated.

"And what is Ni-sama thinking?" she waited.

"We are here Rukia. You should go and see your friends." he changed the subject.

"Your so transparent Byakuya Kuchiki. Have a good day Ni-sama. I mean Kuchiki-sensei."

The two of them had been going about this little game for a while. They had become very close over the past few years and what started as friendship became harmless flirtation and that flirtation quickly lost its harmlessness.

"Quit looking at me like that or Ni-sama will have a fit." Rukia said.

"It's not my fault they designed those skirts to be that short. By the way how much longer are we going to be stuck with Count Dracula as our teacher?" Ichigo asked.

"You watch what you call Ni-sama Ichigo or I swear I'll.."

"You'll what midget?"

She took a swing at him with one of her books. "Ow Rukia!" Ichigo yelled as they began to bicker.

"I can see the love over here. Good morning." Uryu said.

"Morning." they both said as they stopped bickering for a moment to greet him.

"How long will your brother be here? You know how uncomfortable I am with Shinigami here, especially with one at captain level. There must be something big going on but I don't sense anything. Plus he is the last person I'd expect to see here." Uryu said.

"I'm not really sure how long but don't worry there's nothing going on. He's here on vacation."

"Vacation?" Uryu asked.

"Vacation my ass. Tahiti is a vacation. Disney Land is a vacation. No one takes a vacation just to watch his sister go to school." Ichigo said.

"Must be the skirt." Uryu joked.

"What is it with everyone and my skirt today?" Rukia said slapping Ichigo who had put his hand on her butt jokingly.

"Huh?" said Uryu.

"Nothing, lets get to class." Rukia said walking away.

"Good morning class." Byakuya greeted. It took the students a moment to respond as the greeting was harsh like a command.

"Kuchiki-sensei were all glad you are here again today and don't worry were taking good care of your dear sister Rukia. I just love her. Were best friends." a female student said hugging Rukia to get his attention.

"No Rukia is my best friend." another girl demanded and the two began a tug of war over her.

"I'm not letting anyone near my Rukia." Chizuru said as Tatsuki hit her and she sat down.

"That is enough be seated." Byakuya said in a bored voice.

"Yes Kuchiki-sensei." they said in unison.

"Turn to page 54. Kurosaki Ichigo, read."

"Why does he always have to pick on me?" Ichigo said then began to read the page out loud.

Byakuya walked the rows of students as he made them read.

Finding a good position to stand and watch as Rukia' skirt rode up as she sat. All he could think about was getting his hands up that skirt again. That creamy white flesh was just peaking out. If anyone dared to turn their heads to look at her leg he would kill them.

That morning he had found out she wasn't wearing anything underneath either and he would have to return to his desk soon in order to hide what was about to become a very obvious hard on. It was no wonder that he wasn't listening when someone asked him a question.

"Sensei, Kuchiki-sensei?"

"What is it?" he asked looking unfazed.

"Can I be excused?"

"Fine go." those damn kids always distracting him. "You will break into groups of two for the next assignment."

"I call Rukia." Ichigo yelled.

"No you will partner with Inoue." Byakuya said hoping the lure of a perky, large breasted woman would distract the boy from Rukia.

"Yeah it's just you and me Kurosaki-kun." Orihime said excitedly.

"Rukia-san would you like to join up with me." Kojima asked.

"Thrown over again." Asano commented waving his arms.

"You know I prefer older women but there's just something about you Rukia-san."

"Oh well I'm very flattered. Kojima-san."

"You look very much like your brother. Your parents must be very attractive people."

"I thought everyone knew I was adopted." Rukia said.

"Oh I didn't. But I can see the two of you are close. I'm afraid your not going to have much of a social life this year with him around. Lots of us have wanted to ask you out but Ichigo wouldn't let us and now with your brother here keeping such a close eye on you I'm afraid everyone is too scared."

"He hasn't threatened anyone has he?" she said making eye contact with her brother and biting her lower lip seductively to tease him.

"No don't worry." he said in his usual pleasant voice.

"Well you let me know if he does." she let out a smile then spread her legs for her brother to see focusing on her group work.

"Rukia you will stay after class." Byakuya said as he dismissed the rest.

"What is it? Did you think I wouldn't wait for you?"

"Close the door." he commanded.

"Your always so demanding." she said.

"Do you have any idea how hard it was to keep from killing that boy you partnered with?"

"That's not the only thing that was hard. I know why you slid under your desk."

"Rukia you have been so naughty today not wearing anything underneath that skirt. It is your fault I was unable to keep focused." he sat her on his desk and began pulling her skirt up.

"You like it when I'm naughty don't you? What are you doing?" she asked trying to tug her skirt back down but he wouldn't let her.

"I plan on making sure your only a bad girl for me from now on."

"Kuchiki-sensei? Kuchiki-sensei?" a student was asking breaking him out of his trance, while the rest were looking up at him.

"What do you want!" he said with an intensity that nearly knocked everyone in the class backward.

"It's dismissal time." the student said timidly scared out of his wits.

"Fine class dismissed." he said waving them off.

"You ready to go Ni-sama?"

"Yes I suppose."

The next day…

"I discussed the issue with the principal and he assures me that you can wear a longer skirt for modesty."

"That'll really look inconspicuous if I wear a skirt down to my ankles. What's next a chastity belt?"

"Do not tempt me or I put one on you and hide the key in Senbonzakura."

"What do you care anyway?" she stopped and looked at him with her hands on her hips.

"Oh I care Rukia and I believe this is the same spot as yesterday." he said turning to face her.

"Ni-sama!" he lifted her against the wall. "What is wrong with you lately?"

"I only wished to know if you were wearing anything underneath today." he positioned himself between her legs and she wrapped them both around him.

"You could have asked." she smiled as he let his fingers trail along her inner thigh.

"Yes but it is much more fun this way. Do you not agree?" he pressed her sensitive spot and she moaned.

"Whatever pleases you my lord." she said coyly.

"You have no idea how it pleases me."

I like it when your pleased." she said looking into his eyes as her heart rate sped up.

"Rukia I am no longer able to keep my hands off of…" he was ready to unzip his pants there only slightly hidden from the public when….

"Oi Rukia, Byakuya…. What the heck are the two of you doing?" Ichigo asked.

"Good Morning Kuchiki-sensei Kuchiki-san." Inoue said.

"Um Ni-sama was just…um…" she looked at Byakuya with no clue what to say.

"Rukia required some assistance with her skirt." he let her down and smoothed her skirt for effect.

"Oh they can be complicated. Let me help." Inoue said grabbing onto the clasp of the skirt.

"You have no idea how complicated Inoue." Rukia said.

"It is not as complicated as it once was." Byakuya said.

"What the heck is so complicated about a skirt that it takes the three of you to figure out?" Ichigo asked.

"Come we do not wish to be late." Byakuya said walking away.

The classroom….

"Rukia I believe there is something wrong with your vision you are to move to the front row." Byakuya said.

"Sure ok." she said.

"But I always sit next to Rukia." Ichigo whined.

"And now you can sit next to Asano." he said.

"Yea were going to be best friends again." Asano said.

"This totally sucks. I can barely see Rukia' legs from here. That man hates me." Ichigo said to Uryu.

"It might help since your grades are slipping." Uryu said.

"You traitor. Not you too." he said opening his book.

Byakuya sat at his desk as the class was immersed in their math books. Rukia caught his eye ran a hand down her leg and lifted her skirt a bit. Byakuya suppressed a smile and continued looking inconspicuously over his book as she spread her legs apart for him knowing exactly what he wanted to see.

Then the bell rang. "Class dismissed." he said watching her get up to leave.

"Ni-sama?" Rukia asked closing the door after everyone had left.

"Yes Rukia what do you want?" he said feeling defeated knowing they would just part again for the day.

"I saw the way you were staring at my legs." she teased and he raised a brow.

"It was hard not to especially when you opened them wide enough for me to see all of you yet again. I never took you for a tease." he said.

"You did want to know if I was wearing any panties or not earlier." she was giving him a sly smile.

"Now I have my answer and you better not show anyone else besides me. Class has been dismissed. You should go." he said trying not to look at her and stay calm.

"You know you really shouldn't be looking at your sister that way and it was really naughty of you to move me to the front of the room so you could have a better view then yesterday." she crawled up onto his desk on all fours, her skirt riding up high, revealing a lot. She was happy that the magazine she read a while back had seduction techniques that were actually working.

"Do not tease me Rukia. Your games are getting out of hand." he said not stopping himself as he ran his hand over her bare bottom losing any reluctance about touching her.

"And your's have been so innocent lately? I could only imagine the look on Ichigo' face if he knew where your finger was this morning when he caught us. If you wish to stop so badly then why are you lifting my skirt?"

"I warned you about men Rukia. Did I not?" she tried to move to get off of the desk but he stopped her and kept her in place. "Do not move from there. You are going to get what you keep asking for." he said then slid his head under her kneeling form and made contact on her sensitive spot with his tongue.

"Ni! Mmmmm." she moaned as he began sucking and licking on her as she was becoming very wet and finally after a little time tensed to orgasm into his mouth. "Ni…" she was panting trying to catch her breath.

"I told you not to move." he said undoing his belt and dropping his pants quickly.

"You know we can't do anymore then we just did." she said with a look of worry and desire.

"I am head of our clan and I can do with you as I please. Besides if I get you pregnant no one will be able to object. I have been wanting to do this for so long. You have no clue what you do to me do you? Bend down more." he commanded pressing on her back and positioning himself at her entrance and finally thrusting into her.

"It's going to be difficult pretending you're just my overprotective brother after this, god don't stop." she said as he continued moving in and out of her.

"You did not have trouble after the last evening you were at home." he said thrusting into her harder.

"I thought it would relieve some pressure." she moaned.

"Only for a few hours. The way you snuck into my room that night and took me into your mouth. That was bold of you Rukia. I do not know what possessed you to do that but it was a pleasant surprise and your sleepwalking excuse was precious."

"I knew you would enjoy it….harder."

"Just thinking of the way you ran your tongue over my…oh god Rukia I am going to..." he let go inside of her.

She turned over as he tried to catch his breath while pulling his pants back up.

"Are there any other things you wanted to do with me?" she said looking self satisfied and he took her lips.

"Quite a few but we can not do them here. Will you be available tonight?"

"I have to patrol with Ichigo. Some of us have to work you know."

"Well I suppose you do need some recovery time. But I assure you I am not a patient man. I shall not wait for you long."

"You wont have to, I promise."

The next day came and started as normal. Byakuya complained about her short skirt and the rest of the boys in her class looking at her on the way to school. Ichigo and Inoue met up with them. They settled in, then the morning subjects followed.

"Imouto-chan will you assist me in obtaining some supplies?" Byakuya asked.

"Of course Ni-sama." she said sweetly.

"I don't like the way he's looking at her." Ichigo said.

"I think it's sweet they're finally close. I loved my brother very much, we were so close too." Orahime said.

"I don't think it's the same kind of closeness Inoue." Uryu said adjusting his glasses while assessing the scene.

"I can't believe no one's noticed. He's probably out doing god knows what to her." Ichigo said.

"They did just go for supplies. Let's go get lunch. You shouldn't worry about it I'm sure it's nothing" Uryu said trying to make him feel better as the group followed them down the hallway.

…

"Well its dark in here what do you expect." Rukia said.

"You were startled by a mop Rukia." Byakuya said.

"I cant help it we really might get caught this time and it was a scary mop." she said as he kissed her neck.

"Let me worry about the consequences. I never had a chance to check you this morning. Did you wear any…no you did not." he said grinning and unbuttoning his pants.

"Let's just hurry." she said as he pinned her against the wall.

"Your wet for me already."

"I can't help it, the way you kiss me drives me…" she said as he kissed her again.

"When I get you home we should repeat yesterdays activities in my office…Rukia. I have fanaticized about that often." he said sliding into her easily.

"Oh god Byakuya." she yelled and he put his hand over her mouth.

"Shh or someone will hear you. You can scream all you want when we get home."

"So you don't mind the servants hearing?"

"Rukia!" he came inside of her.

"Whose yelling now?" she grinned.

"I think the servants will expect it when we are married."

"Married?"

"I want you in my bed as soon as we return. I will take care of everything. You will be my wife" he kissed her "my angel" he kissed her again "my slave" he kissed her again "I will not let you out of our bed."

"Your so controlling. That sounds like more of a command then a proposal."

"It was. Do you really think I would take the chance of you saying no, and have you run off with one of those boys. Just the thought of you doing what we just did with one of them makes me want to…'

"Ow don't bite." she said. "Well you know they are still young and energetic, you are getting on in years, maybe you should show me what I would be missing if I did run off… with one of these boys." she teased.

He kissed her hard and entered her again she moaned loudly. "I can assure you none of those boys would be able to make you orgasm so quickly."

"Lunch will be over in a few minutes, we should get back. We need supplies." she handed him a small can of paint.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" he asked holding the silver can.

"I don't know. Before I forget. I worked it out with Ichigo and I wont have to patrol tonight."

Later..

.

"I was going to go mad waiting for the day to be over. You changed for me." He kissed her when the car doors shut.

"I wanted to wear something different then this uniform since you complain so much about the skirt." she said as he noted how sexy she looked in a short black dress.

"Do keep the uniform. I think we should bring it home for our personal use. We can go anywhere you wish. Things will be more restrictive when we get home so do choose carefully…Rukia I am driving." he said as she unzipped his pants.

"Just keep you eyes on the road." she removed his hardening manhood and placed it in her mouth and began sucking on him.

He swerved before nearly hitting another car. "Be careful will you." she yelled at him and he pushed her head back down to motion her to take him in her mouth again.

"I am going to enjoy the next thousand years with you." he said as she swallowed what he just gave to her. "We are here."

"Where are we?" she asked peaking her head up to look out and smoothing her hair down.

"I thought we would have dinner."

"It looks like a parking garage."

"It is Rukia. The restaurant is outside." he said running his hand up the inside of her leg and placing a finger in her. "You are always so wet for me." he threw her seat back and got on top of her as quickly as he could manage squeezing in the tight space.

"I can not get enough of your body." he said.

"I never expected you to have so much…energy." she said moaning in between words.

"It has been over sixty years Rukia. I am unable to control myself anymore."

"You know you're my first, right?" she said.

"You took me so easily but yes that is why I did not attack you again after the first time."

"Yeah well that night I snuck into your room you did manage to work all of your fingers into me." she said.

"Rukia every time you mention that night you make me…" he tensed then relaxed on her. "I love you Rukia."

"I love you too. We had better go eat something." she said but he wouldn't let her go just yet as he kissed her over and over.

"So eager to get away from me?" he whispered to her.

"No I'm starving. We didn't have lunch incase you forgot." she pushed him off.

"I was well satisfied with what I had for lunch." he said and she smiled at him.

"It's time to look presentable. Make with the bored look." she said.

"Now Rukia I have no trouble looking my normal self."

"Really? You look like the cat who just ate the canary."

"And your glowing." he rebutted.

"Do you think anyone can tell what we just did?"

"I doubt it although the security guard watching the monitors may have had some entertainment this evening."

"Let's go…. Oh my god Ichigo what are you doing here? Hey Orihime." Rukia said mortified she just ran into the two.

"Kurosaki-kun is taking me to dinner. Are the two of you eating here too? Yea we can all have dinner together." Orihime said perkily.

"I guess." Rukia said.

"Rukia you look so pretty your practically glowing." Orihime said.

"She's right there is something different about you. You had the same look right after lunch." Ichigo said.

"Ahem. Yes the two of you shall be my guests for dinner this evening." Byakuya said to divert attention from the current direction of the conversation.

"Thanks Byakuya man. See I knew we would be friends." Ichigo said.

"Kurosaki Ichigo you should refer to me properly."

"Now I can't very well refer to you as my brother in law yet buddy." Ichigo said so only he could hear it.

"Ni-sama what's that look for?" Rukia asked breaking from her side conversation with Orihime.

"You were right Rukia. I am hungrier then I previously thought." was all he answered.

"See I told you." she said while they were being seated.

"Everything's so expensive." Orihime said.

"Were lucky Byakuya is such a good sport." Ichigo said slapping him on the back.

"Martini straight up and do not dally." Byakuya said to the waiter who hurried off.

"Excuse me I shall return in a moment." Byakuya said getting up after they had ordered.

"I had better go too before the food gets here. This way the two of you can get some alone time on your date." Rukia said.

"This isn't a date Rukia." Ichigo said and Orihime frowned.

"Nonsense. I'll be right back." Rukia said hurrying after her brother.

"Rukia what are you…?" she cut his question off with her lips.

"Imagine the gossip if we got caught doing this back in Seiretei." she said helping him drop his pants.

"You my dear are insatiable." he said lifting her against the stall.

"Less talk we have to hurry."

"That will not be a problem." he said slamming into her roughly making a huge banging noise.

"Oh god Byakuya." she moaned followed by his own.

"Clean up quickly. I do not want the children to suspect. It is our duty to be a positive influence."

"Your right we have to be good role models. I'm glad they're finally dating."

"I am pleased you have said that. I believe Kurosaki thinks he still has a chance with you."

"You worry too much Ni-sama." she said as they both approached the table.

"Just in time." Rukia said as the first course was served as soon as they sat.

"Is Kuchiki-sensei enjoying his vacation?" Orihime asked.

"It has been…" he thought for a moment. "productive."

"Why are you teaching at our school, when you could be vacationing somewhere nice?" Ichigo asked.

"Kaurakara Town holds one of my most prized assets. I thought it best to keep an eye on…. it's development." he said making Rukia visibly blush.

"It's so nice that the two of you are friends now. My brother and I were really close. He was the best."

"Where is he currently?" Byakuya asked.

"A hollow ate him." Ichigo said.

"Don't be so insensitive idiot." Rukia said.

"It was a car accident but I loved him very much and I know he loved me too."

"I love my… sister… very much as well." Byakuya said and Rukia spit out her water.

"Rukia we discussed your table manners."

"Rukia you've been acting strange for the last two days. You were completely useless on patrol the other night." Ichigo said talking with his mouth full.

"Speaking about useless, aren't you supposed to be patrolling for me tonight?" Rukia said.

"I think I'm entitled to a little recreation too. Isn't that right Byakuya old boy."

"One should not engage in too much recreation." he answered.

"I was under the impression you couldn't get too much recreation." Rukia said.

"As long as ones work gets completed then recreation is fine in between assignments."

"You once said life wasn't supposed to be fun and recreation." she teased.

"The new hobby you introduced me to be changed my mind." Byakuya said.

"Glad to see your finally having some fun. Since Rukia never lets me have any fun with her I asked Inoue to come to dinner with me when I ran into her earlier." Ichigo said.

"That is very lucky for you Kurosaki." Byakuya said not commenting about Inoue but that Rukia never let him have any fun with her.

"Hey Byakuya do you think you can spare Rukia tonight? I was thinking about confessing to her. You cant have me as a brother in law if I don't start somewhere." Ichigo said on the sly.

"Kurosaki Ichigo." he said loud enough for most in the room to shake with fear.

"I...I…I" Ichigo said cowering.

"There will be no need. I will ask her for you."

"Byakuya man you're the best." Ichigo said.

"Rukia?" Byakuya got her attention.

"I didn't mean now." Ichigo said panicking.

"Have you any intention of ever dating Kurosaki Ichigo?" he asked seriously.

"Byakuya! Oh right that's that sadistic sense of humor we rarely get to see. What would I possibly do with an unskilled teenager?" she said giving Byakuya a seductive look and a small smile crept onto his face.

"Hey what do you mean unskilled teenager?" Ichigo said offended.

"It's no offence Ichigo but I prefer an older man." she said matter of factly.

"Older! Your already over a hundred. Wait are you seeing someone? Cuz it sounds like you have someone in mind already. Who the heck is he?" he said and Byakuya was now giving a full smile.

"Kuchiki-sama should smile more often." Inoue said as both girls swooned.

"Why is he smiling and why are you blushing? Oh god, don't tell me…not the two of you. Arghhhh! Tell me it's not true. You're her brother." Ichigo fumed.

"She is adopted Kurosaki-kun." Inoue said.

"Shut up Inoue." he said.

"Don't talk to Inoue like that." Rukia hit him on the head.

"Ow. I just don't get how you can be with him. I'm the one who saved you. I could even understand if it was Renji but him. What the heck are you thinking?"

"Kurosaki we do not always see what is right in front of us. Perhaps you should consider what you are overlooking before it is too late." Byakuya looked at Inoue.

"But he tried to kill you." Ichigo said confused as hell.

"Only out of love." Rukia said.

"Love? Love! I get it, all of those cherry blossom fumes have finally gone to your head. I know this is a joke. You always did have the meanest sense of humor and I've heard rumors he has one just like yours. That's it right? It's a joke." Ichigo said forcing a laugh.

"Whatever you wish to believe Kurosaki Ichigo." Byakuya said.

"That's a relief. To think the two of you. You really had me going there. I never thought I'd get to see you joking around. I knew you couldn't be all serious."

"I think this evening has come to an end. Rukia we have sibling things to attend to." he signed his name on the bill and got up.

"Um yes NIIII-Sama." she stressed the title and followed him.

"Thank you for dinner. Kuchiki-sama, Kuchiki-san." Orihime said.

"Thanks again Byakuya." Ichigo said making him cringe.

"Rukia after this experience and the last few days, I can honestly say I do not care for teenagers. The girl is tolerable and polite but the boy…I do not want to think about it anymore… We should go somewhere for the weekend."

"Hey Rukia wait up!" Orihime yelled running after her.

"What is it Orihime?" Rukia asked embracing her friend.

"I almost forgot. We've rented a cabin and all of us are going to the forest this weekend. It's a last minute thing. You have to come. I'll be so sad if you don't."

"I cant leave Ni-sama alone on his vacation."

"Kuchiki-sama can come too it will be lots of fun. I wont take no for an answer."

"I umm."

"I have to catch up with Kurosaki-kun. Were leaving at 5am. Be at my house." she waved running away.

"This could be interesting." he said.

"You aren't thinking of going?" she said shocked.

"Rukia the next thousand years will consist of us staring at one another and pouring tea. Come we have items to purchase." he said.

The next early morning….

"Eh where'd you get that SUV?" Ichigo pointed at the shiny black truck with items piled on top.

"Ni-sama bought it last night and we've got plenty of supplies too. Where's everyone else?"

"Ishida had some Quincey thing and Chad had to fly to Mexico for a funeral. So its just the four of us." Inoue said.

"Oh well um." Rukia panicked.

"You cant back out Rukia." "Rukia" she whispered. "I'm trying to get Ichigo to like me but I'm too scared to go alone. You'll help me, please!"

"Well let's get going." Rukia said.

"I'll drive." Ichigo said.

"I shall drive. In the back seat Kurosaki." Byakuya commanded.

"Your such a good driver." Rukia said.

"You should see me drive Rukia. I just got my license." Ichigo said.

"Well you did a good job Ichigo." Rukia said like a mother.

"Kurosaki please sit back and fasten your safety belt. Is everyone prepared? I have not made plans for detours." Byakuya said.

"Ichigo when we get back we can take a drive together. I cant wait to see you drive." Orihime said.

"Thanks Orihime." Ichigo was sitting with his arms crossed, disappointed feeling like a child.

"I've packed us all lunch so eat when you are hungry." Rukia said.

"That was most thoughtful. I had neglected to pack lunch but I do have a pre-made dinner packed with the rest of the food." Byakuya said.

"I saw it was ordered from that restaurant wasn't it? Looks really good." Rukia said.

"Your favorites."

"That's so thoughtful."

"The temperature is dropping and I fear it may rain. Do put on your sweater. I will not have you catching cold." Byakuya said.

"Fine so I don't have to argue. Here open up." she said feeding him a piece of food.

"I swear those two act just like an old married couple." Ichigo said.

"I think it's cute." Orihime said.

They drove up a dirt road that lead to the cabin. Pine trees cast their shadow everywhere, dark clouds were rolling in, the trees began to sway violently, and a slight drizzle started to hit the windshield.

"Yea were here! And just in time. That thunder is loud and scary." Orihime said as the two girls got out and walked together.

"Unload the car Kurosaki." Byakuya said waving his hand.

"Why do I have to do it all?" Ichigo whined but did it anyway.

"Oh we have to figure out sleeping arrangements. There are only three bedrooms and four of us." Orihime said.

"The two of you are too young to share a room." Byakuya said to Orihime and Ichigo.

"I guess the girls could double up." Ichigo said as it began to rain outside.

"No, Rukia and I are used to living together. She will stay with me."

"Rukia sleeps in my closet maybe she should stay with me."

"That would not be appropriate. She will be much more comfortable with me." Byakuya said as Rukia latched unto him when she reacted to the thunder and he looked down at her enjoying the reaction way too much.

"It's ok Ichigo. I'm used to sleeping with Byakuya-sama. Sleeping near…I mean sleeping near. He's my brother so there's nothing to worry about. It's perfectly innocent." she said trying not to look guilty.

"Yeah that's what they said about Caligula and his sister." Ichigo mumbled.

"Did you say something Ichigo?" Rukia said.

"No."

"Let's heat up dinner Kuchiki-san." Inoue said.

"Kurosaki Ichigo collect firewood." Byakuya commanded.

"But it's raining outside."

"You're the only one who can do it Kurosaki-kun before it gets to wet to use." Orihime said urging him.

"Fine. I don't know why I came on this stupid trip. He's not going to let Rukia out of his sight for a moment. I have to get her alone." he said to himself.

The pre-made dinners micro waved well. The men ate in silence and the girls talked about everything, Orihime was particularly excited. Orihime and Rukia plotted to get Ichigo to spend time alone with Orihime. The rain still poured outside and didn't show any sign of letting up anytime soon.

"Rukia we should go to be early tonight. You must be exhausted." Byakuya said looking at her and raising his eyebrow to tell her what he was planning to do with her when he got her to the bedroom.

"Yeah that's a good idea. Oh don't let us ruin the party." Rukia said getting up.

"But Rukia I wanted to talk to you about something." Ichigo said.

"I'm sure it can wait until the morning. I am pretty sleepy." Rukia walked toward the bedroom with Byakuya following her nonchalantly.

"It's ok Kurosaki-kun we could play a game or something." Orihime said.

"Would you stop calling me that. Just call me Ichigo."

"Sure Ichigo." she blushed and found a box marked Go.

The bedroom…

"We are finally alone. We went to bed so early last night and I do not know how much longer I can go without having you. I may explode." he said lounging on the bed in his night kimono after making a fire in the fireplace.

"Oh but you're my brother we can't. Someone might catch us." she said feigning concern standing in front of the bed in a short red silk robe.

"Take off the robe and let me see what I bought you." he was getting hard watching her.

"Like this?" she teased slowly untying her robe. With his eyes glued to her and a now throbbing hard on he reached out for her.

"Come here I can not wait another second." he threw her on the bed and got on top of her. "I can not go this long without you again."

"You know you might have a problem…I think I can help you with it though."

"I know you can." he nearly had her clothes over her head when…

"Rukia! Rukia!" Orihime knocked at the door.

"What is it Inoue?" she opened the door. Why are you crying?" Rukia said tying her robe.

"Ichigo he said he said." she tried to speak but couldn't.

"We should go back to your room." Rukia said helping her.

"So what did he say?"

"He said he was in love with you and asked me to help him get you away from Kuchiki-sama for a while so he could tell you."

"That insensitive bastard! Stop crying please it will be ok." Rukia said.

"Please stay with me." Orihime said.

"Oh um." a knock came at the door.

"Rukia are you coming back to bed?" Byakuya said through the door.

"Please stay with me." Inoue said with sad wide eyes.

"Ni-sama I need to stay with Inoue."

"Rukia I am growing impatient."

"Inoue is upset I am staying with her tonight." she said getting angry.

"Rukia we need our sleep."

"and that's exactly what your going to get tonight. All you men are so insensitive. I'm staying here."

"Over twenty four hours Rukia." he said his body overheated and needing her.

"If you don't leave us alone it'll be another twenty four!" she said and he banged his fist on the door. "Now listen to me Orihime he's just a stupid boy. He doesn't know what he wants. But they have a one track mind so we just have to shift his interest to you. Once he realizes Byakuya and I are together he will need someone to help him get over it so listen good here's my plan…"

"Hey Byakuya what the heck did I say to make her cry?" Ichigo asked concerned.

"Who the hell knows. They are all crazy." he said slamming the door in Ichigo's face.

"Byakuya!" Ichigo said shocked never expecting him to act like that.

The next day it was till raining hard. No one could go outside.

"Ni-sama you made breakfast?"

"Yes I am able to cook. I do not know what we argued about last night but I hope this makes up for it, darling." he kissed her on the cheek.

"Darling!" Ichigo said looking angry but still in denial.

"They're so sweet together." Orihime said.

"They are not together." Ichigo said.

"Eat up Rukia." Byakuya put more food on her plate.

"Yes you have to be really healthy if your planning on having children." Orihime said.

"Children!" Ichigo exclaimed.

"She is correct. There are plenty of rooms in the manor to fill." Byakuya said pouring her juice.

"Your so good to me." Rukia said.

"Are you expecting me, Rukia, and our children to live with you?" Ichigo asked.

"No Kurosaki."

"What the heck is going on then?" Ichigo looked confused.

"According to you, nothing." Rukia said.

"Kurosaki clean the dishes. Since the rain is showing no sign of an end we must find something else to occupy our time." Byakuya said.

"Oh I came prepared. I have a movie for us. It's about a group of people who rent a cabin for the week but cant leave for some reason." Orihime said.

"Well that sounds interesting lets watch it." Rukia said.

"I could be killing hollows right now." Ichigo mumbled.

"Well we wont have to close the curtains, it's already dark outside. Ok and play." Orihime said hitting the button on the remote.

Orihime sat next to Ichigo and Rukia was in between him and Byakuya on the couch.

"Ahh!" Orihime jumped and grabbed onto Ichigo' arm. He kind of enjoyed it but instead of looking at her he looked over to Rukia who was huddled up against Byakuya. Ichigo tried to put his arm around Rukia but he was too slow as Byakuya anticipated his move and pulled Rukia closer.

"Rukia?" Byakuya whispered. "Think they would miss us if we snuck away."

"I already tried to get up Ichigo has me pinned down. Besides they might figure out why were sneaking away. We can't show teenagers were doing you know what and were not married yet."

"If we wait much longer I will not care who is watching." he kissed her on the neck.

"It's just a few more hours and then we can go to bed." she ran her hand up his leg and rubbed him until he was getting hard.

"Rukia bedroom now." he commanded about to get up.

"Oh that was a scary move. What should we do now?" Orihime said stopping them.

"I think Rukia needs a nap." Byakuya said taking her hand and leading her to the bedroom. If they waited any longer he was going to kill someone.

"Can't she take a nap without your help?" Ichigo asked beating them to the door and blocking their way.

"Kurosaki Ichigo" he was about to kill the boy then calmed himself. "Did you have something else in mind?"

"We could all play cards." Orihime suggested.

Two and a half boring hours later…

"Who's deal is it?" Rukia asked perking up when she felt her brothers hand sliding under her dress.

"Ichigo I think. He's such a great card player." Orihime said cheerfully.

"Thanks Orihime. Your sweet. Rukia…Rukia" Ichigo said.

"Huh?" Rukia had no idea how much time had passed but she was enjoying the fingers that were sliding in and out of her.

"Are you in or out?" Ichigo said with frustration.

"Um in, no out, no in, out, in."

"Make up your mind already." he said.

"Oh god don't stop." she nearly yelled.

"Rukia?" Ichigo asked.

"Um …Don't stop playing cards. It's fun. Yes! Yes! I'm in." she said.

"You look hot Rukia, are you feeling ok?" Orihime asked.

"Fine, I'm just fine." she said trying to catch her breath and looking at Byakuya like she was ready to eat him.

"It must be your deal Kuchiki-sama." Orihime said handing him the cards.

Rukia was starting to return the favor. She unbuttoned his pants and slid her hand in gripping him firmly. His expression never changed but he was beginning to really enjoy it when…

"Oh no the lights went out." Orihime said.

"I saw some flashlights under the kitchen sink." Byakuya said then latched himself onto Rukia' lips when no one could see. His tongue assaulting every inch of her mouth.

"I'll go get them. Everyone just stay where you are." Ichigo said.

"Not much time." Byakuya said pulling her under the table, pulling her dress up and trying to free himself from his already unbuttoned pants.

"I found some lanterns. Hey why are you two on the floor." Ichigo said illuminating the two in an awkward position under the table.

"Rukia slipped." Byakuya said buttoning his pants before turning around.

"Yeah It was really dark. I shouldn't have tried to get up." she pulled her dress down.

"We should just go to bed." Byakuya said the frustration coming out in his voice.

"But we haven't had dinner yet. I don't know how to use the stove." Orihime said.

"I don't have a clue either." Ichigo said.

"Fine what the hell do…what would you kids like to have for dinner." Byakuya said calming himself as best he could.

"I'll give you a hand Kuchiki-sama." Orihime said taking some items out of the refrigerator.

"So Rukia were finally alone." Ichigo said trying to put his arm around her.

"Yeah we should probably help and set the table or something." she said slipping out of his arm.

"Just a few minutes Rukia I want to tell you how I feel about you." he tried to kiss her brushing against her lips as she pulled away.

"You know Orihime really likes you." she said.

"I know but you and me we should be together."

"There is no you and me. I'm ten times your age."

"Oh Rukia your so modest." Ichigo said.

"Ichigo your so dense. We cant be together."

"Why the heck not? It's your brother isn't it?"

"Well yeah."

"I knew it. Your afraid he might not approve."

"That's not what he would do if he caught you kissing me."

"I don't trust him, you know how men are. I think he likes you as more then a sister. But don't worry I'll protect you if he try's anything."

"Ichigo you're a moron..."

"Dinners ready!" Orihime said.

…

"You think that rain will ever stop? All of that thunder makes me jumpy. It might be days before the powers back on." Rukia said getting into bed and snuggling into Byakuya' arms.

"I do not care if it ever stops. I am just glad to finally have you alone. I can not wait any longer." He said kissing her and pulling the strap of her nightgown down her arm.

"Sorry I couldn't reciprocate what you did for me this afternoon." she said.

"You have no idea what you do to me do you? Always teasing me and denying me for two days. It is becoming painful. You have no clue what that does to a man. "

"Well I guess I wont have to wait any longer to find out will I. eek! That was loud." she clung to him when she heard the loud bang of thunder.

"Rukia, Rukia are you ok in there? I heard you yell." Ichigo said banging on the door.

"She is fine go back to bed." Byakuya said.

"I want to hear that from her."

"Rukia um." Orihime said now joining the knocking.

"What is it Inoue?" Rukia said frustrated.

"I'm kind of scared of sleeping by myself can I come in?"

"Um yeah." Rukia said pulling her night dress back on.

"Good." Orihime said opening the door and getting into bed next to Rukia and a slight smile crept on Byakuya' face when he looked at the two innocent looking girls holding one another. There isn't a straight man on the planet who wouldn't have had the thought that crossed his mind at the moment.

"There's no way I'm leaving the two of them alone in a bed with you." Ichigo said getting in bed in between Rukia and Byakuya after seeing the passing look on the mans face.

"Rukia." Byakuya lipped. She gave him a what the heck do you want me to do look.

"Kurosaki Ichigo. I have no intention of sleeping next to you and I will not allow you to sleep next to my sister."

"Well I'm not leaving." he crossed his arms looking angry.

"Ichigo I think you'll be more comfortable next to Orihime. Your so tall and all I think you should sleep on the end." Rukia said forcing him to climb over to the other side of Orihime.

"This is ridiculous." Byakuya whispered.

"Maybe we can move to another room when Ichigo falls asleep. Hime is already sleeping." she said.

"I shall assume this is what having children is like."

"She's holding me too tightly I cant reach your…"

"It will just have to wait." he said.

"Where are you going?"

"To take a cold shower."

"Would you two be quiet." Ichigo said.

"Shut up Ichigo." they both said in unison.

By morning Byakuya had rolled onto the floor. Rukia was hanging over the side of the bed and Orihime and Ichigo were holding each other tightly.

"Mmmm Rukia." Ichigo said waking up. He opened his eyes. "Orihime!"

"Good morning Kurosaki-kun I mean Ichigo. Let's make breakfast for everyone."

"I don't know how to use this ancient thing." he said poking at the stove.

"Oh we'll just have to wait for Kuchiki-sama to wake up. I'm surprised neither of them woke up when we did. The rain's let up a bit."

"Yeah I didn't realize how pretty your eyes are in the sunlight." Ichigo said.

"You've never said anything like that before Ichigo." Orihime said.

…

"Ni-sama why are you on the floor?"

"Rukia you are the only person I ever wish to share a room with as long as I live. How did you ever manage to be in the same room with that boy? He snores loudly and the girl makes all sorts of noises. How could you sleep through all of that?"

"Guess I'm used to it. When I was a kid there were at least fifteen of us in a room a quarter of this size so I can sleep through just about anything."

"I know I tried to wake you last night after I took a shower. The boy woke up and gave me a dirty look so I did my best to sleep. I found myself on the floor at some point so I stayed there." he pulled her down on top of him.

"Guess we don't need a bed." she laughed and embraced him.

"We have not so far. I should have thought of this last night." he placed heated and heavy kisses on her neck.

"We would have gotten caught. How would we explain what we were doing? They're just kids you know. Ouch." he bit her hard then she moaned.

"They are not that young Rukia. I think they would have figured out what we are doing. I am just happy we can do it now without interruption." he forced her down on the ground and got on top of her nearly leaving a bruise on her arm where he was squeezing her.

"You've never been so rough. I like it." she bit his lip and tugged his hair.

"You have never kept me waiting this long since we began doing this." he ripped off her robe placing rough hard kisses on the parts of her that were exposed. The tension had become too much. Then they heard a loud bang from outside.

"Ichigo don't! Rukia! Kuchiki-sama!" Orihime yelled from the kitchen followed by another large bang and the smell of smoke.

"Be quiet I know what I'm doing!" Ichigo yelled.

"You better get ready and make breakfast before those two burn the whole forest down. I'll go make sure they aren't trying to turn the gas on. It's really hard to explain two dead teenagers." Rukia said getting up and putting her clothes on.

"It will not be that difficult if I have to go another day without being inside of you. I swear Rukia I may do to that boy what that masked maniac did to those people with the knife in that cabin movie. I really dislike teenagers."

"If you don't go psycho I will. You better get me a nanny or five to deal with this when the time comes." she said.

"I was thinking more along the lines of rabid dogs and electric fences."

"Do you believe last night when you were making dinner with Inoue, Ichigo tried to confess to me. Then he tried to kiss me. The idiot."

"It is settled I will kill him. Where do we keep the knives."

"Your awful."

"Yes but you love me none the less." he pushed her up against the wall and kissed her forgetting what was going on in the other room.

"Ichigo no!" Orihime yelled followed by another crash.

"I had better go." Rukia said leaving the room. Byakuya was so frustrated at this point that he left deep fingernail marks in the wall and headed for another cold shower.

…

"You're an awesome cook Ni…

"You really need to stop calling me that it is not proper."

"Byakuya." she blushed.

"That is better." he said kissing her on the lips in front of everyone.

"You cant kiss her!" Ichigo yelled.

"Why can't she kiss her brother? It's sweet they're so close." Orihime said making it sound more innocent then it was.

"Because…um…well because." she stumped him with her question.

"Kurosaki you have a lovely young woman sitting beside you who cares a great deal for you, yet you continue to obsess over Rukia. You do realize by now that it is no more then a childish crush that you need to get over? She has no intention of being with you."

"I well…"

"I'm not interested in Ichigo anymore." Orihime interrupted.

"What?" Ichigo said. "Huh?" Rukia said and Byakuya looked at her concerned.

"That's right. I'm tired of chasing after Ichigo-kun. If he doesn't like me there's nothing I can do so I'll just have to find someone else. I'm sure I can find someone who will care for me."

"That a girl Inoue. I know you'll find someone as wonderful as I have." Rukia said looking up at Byakuya who had his hand on her shoulder.

"But Orihime. I..I." Ichigo said.

"I do have a cousin who would more then appreciate you and he is not far from your age. You would not be at want for anything with him and you would be able to see Rukia whenever you wished." Byakuya said.

"He sounds nice. Does he look anything like you."

"Yes actually there is a strong resemblance."

"Oh I'd love to meet him." Orihime said.

"Inoue!" Ichigo exclaimed.

"Yep I've wasted this whole vacation chasing after you. I'm going to do something by myself so I don't waste anymore of it." she said getting up and going to the other side of the room and finally relaxing with a book.

"Uh Orihime what are doing?" Ichigo got up and followed her.

"Reading." she said not looking at him and continuing to read.

"Is the book interesting?"

"Yes." she said not paying attention to him.

"What's it about?"

"I don't know yet I just started reading." she didn't look at him.

"I didn't know you liked books. Orihime…Orihime?" Ichigo said waving to get her attention.

"Get me a soda." she commanded still not looking at him.

"Yes anything else? Anything at all I can get you?" Ichigo said tripping over himself to get the can.

"She may not look it but the girl is a genius." Byakuya said to Rukia who nodded as they enjoyed the rest of a leisurely breakfast at the round table sitting across from one another.

"These newspapers contain much more gossip then ours do but it is a relief not seeing Yumichika' picture for once." he said.

"Really? What's going on in the living world?" she asked drinking coffee.

"Well it seems there is an oil leak in the ocean devastating shore lines." he said looking at the paper.

"Oh wow that sounds horrible. Um what's oil?"

"I have no clue but it can not be that important as it is a tiny article under this much larger one about this man who had an affair. I am trying to figure out his relevance to the world but it only mentions a sport he plays. They must have left out his real occupation. So careless." he said.

"Now that is certainly horrible. I'd be really mad. Let me see that." she jerked the page out of his hand.

"I should check the business section anyway, we have many properties here in the living world that I have left alone for many years… I am sure have gained sizeable value…oh well I am glad we did not buy more here."

"Is it bad?" she moved forward.

"There is nothing to worry about however it is probably best if we do not partake in any large projects this year."

"Oh, and I was so looking forward to covering the floors in gold." she said laughing.

"We can still do that if you wish but I think it is a bit ostentatious."

"It was a joke…It says this man checked into a rehab center for sexual addiction. You might need to go to that… You better not cheat on me or I'll freeze the cherry blossoms right off you."

"You are cute when you are threatening me and If I am going to rehabilitation you will be joining me. I do believe we are well matched in that respect. There is nothing for you to worry about you will always find me in your bed."

"That's good for you because I found a lot of interesting things on what the humans call the internet that I want to do with you. I can bend over backwards you know."

"Rukia if you continue teasing me I will take you right on this table and show the kids how it is properly done."

"You have no idea how badly I want you to." she gave him a seductive look.

"I have some idea. You woke something up in me that I can not control anymore. I want to completely devour you. I hope your proud of yourself."

"Very. We should talk about what were going to do when we get home."

"Well I plan to have you in the bedroom, on the floor, on the kitchen counter, in the shower, on the roof, on the dining table, under the large maple, under the small maple, under the peach tree, und…"

"That's not what I mean."

"There will be no objections Senbonzakura will see to that. It is very simple, my signature declaring we are wedded then I take you to my bed in the manor proving you are my property. Nothing complicated. I have already sent the declaration ahead and I plan on having you the second we walk through the door."

"That seems barbaric. I'm not property. Our customs are so biased. Don't I even have a say in all of this?"

"No but if you wish to back out now it is not too late."

"You know I wont."

"I know. I would not let you ,had you said otherwise." he said.

"More coffee." she said as he poured her more.

… That night

"We have to leave by five in the morning so load the car up now with what you do not need."

"Well what should we do for our last night?" Rukia said.

"I found these earlier." Ichigo held up a few bottles of sake.

"Sake! I'll get some glasses." Rukia said.

"A very good suggestion." Byakuya said welcoming the liquid. Something had to quell his lust and sake was sounding like a good solution for the moment.

"Rukia-san you look so cute in that dress. Doesn't she Kuchiki-sama." Orihime said as they all sat around on the floor.

"There must be something we can do" Ichigo said bored and tipsy.

"I have a game we could play. It's just a stack of cards for breaking the ice between new friends. Each has a question and it has to be answered."

"Hmm this seems like dejavu. Have we played this once before, with Rangiku? " Rukia asked Byakuya.

"I do not recall."

"Are there dares involved?" she asked.

"Nope. It's just a game about honesty. One answers the question and you get a point for everyone you are willing to answer honestly. No dares involved."

"Better then doing nothing. Lets play." Rukia said.

"Ok I'll ask the questions. Here's the first one for you Kuchiki-sama. What do you spend most of your money on?" Orihime asked.

"Rukia. and I can justify that with receipts." he answered.

"Ok Ichigo Who was the last person you kissed."

"I'm not answering that."

"But you wont get a point."

"Fine it was Rukia. Don't kill me." Ichigo said preparing for a hit.

"She told me." Byakuya stated.

"What do you mean she told you?" he asked.

"Next question Inoue." Rukia said interrupting what could end up as an argument.

"Oh um Rukia-san How many times have you had sex in the last three months."

"Oh well let's see um five I think if you count doing it more then one time a session." she said counting on her fingers.

"Rukia!" Ichigo exclaimed.

"What?"

"I didn't know you were seeing anyone."

"You're an idiot Ichigo."

"My turn. The question is Who are you jealous of? Well I…I'm jealous of Rukia-san. I'm sorry. It's just that Ichigo likes you so much and now your so happy. I want to be happy like you are. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize Inoue. I'd love to have a chest like you do, everyone's jealous of something. No big deal." the girls hugged.

"Kuchiki-sama How often have you had sex in the last week?"

"I do believe it has been about five times. More if there were less interruptions."

"Five, just like Rukia. Your full of surprises. Rukia never mentioned you were seeing anyone." Ichigo said.

"God your dumber then Renji." Rukia said.

"What?" Ichigo asked.

"Ok then Ichigo-kun Is there someone your in love with?"

"Yes I think so." he said.

"Who?" Rukia asked.

"I answered the question so move on." Ichigo said.

"Rukia-san Do you plan on ever marrying?"

"I think I'm already half married so yeah. It's not like I really have a say in it anyway." she looked at Byakuya.

"They're not forcing you to marry are they?" Ichigo asked.

"Not really."

"What's one thing that drives you mad? I'd say stupid teenager males who don't know what they have until they don't anymore."

"I know lets just ask everyone 2 questions at a time to make it more interesting and see how many they answer." Rukia said.

"Ok I'll ask and you guys answer them. you go first Ichigo. What's your favorite body part on a girl? How many girls have you been with?"

"Her boobs and none." he said quietly, embarrassed as everyone laughed at him.

"Ok Rukia-san Is there someone you like? And Would you make out with the male sitting closest to you?"

"Yes and yes." she looked at Byakuya who she was practically sitting on top of.

"Kuchiki-sama Do you like to play sex games? and Is the girl sitting closest to you wearing any underwear?"

"Yes and…" he inconspicuously checked "no."

"Hey how would he know. I call foul." Ichigo said.

"Ichigo Who in this room would you date? And Have you ever had sex in a car?"

"Anyone but him and no." Ichigo said.

"Rukia-san Are you a sexual deviant?…"

"Yes she is." Byakuya interjected.

"Oh Um and Where was the last place you had sex?"

"I can't answer that. It isn't proper for you to hear." Rukia said and Byakuya smiled.

"Not proper. You just said you were having sex. How is a bed not proper? Unless you didn't have it in a…Rukia!" Ichigo freaked out.

"Kuchiki-sama On a scale from 1 to 10 with one being the least, how much do you want to have sex right now? And How long is your penis if male or your partners if female. Oh that's embarrassing you don't have to answer. I'll pick another card." Orihime said.

"Eleven." he answered.

"Um that doesn't answer either question." Orihime said confused.

"It is the answer to both." he said.

"I can vouch for that." Rukia said.

"What the heck do you mean by that Rukia? I'm starting to think the two of you are hiding something." Ichigo said.

"We're not hiding anything Ichigo. Your just a moron." Rukia said.

The hours passed quickly. Everyone ended up in the same sleeping arrangement they had the night before. With only a few hours of sleep they had to make the drive back.

"I am cutting this vacation short." Byakuya said opening the gateway back to the manor grounds as soon as they were out of their gigai.

"Byakuya!" she yelled when he threw her over his shoulder and walked through the door, his riatsu blaring erratically around him.

"I do not want to hear it, you have made me wait long enough." he said hurrying through the halls.

"Kuchiki-sama what are you doing? We really must protest this union." an elder said as he passed her in the hallway.

"Unless you want to die, hold your tongue woman." he said ferociously.

"Well!" the woman said.

"Over forty eight hours. I am not waiting any longer for you. Undress." he started ripping at her Shinigami robes and didn't wait until they were fully off to enter her.

"This is our first time in a bed." she said barely able to catch her breath because he was pumping her so hard. He didn't answer because he was so focused on what he was doing to her.

"Oh god Byakuya!" her yell shook the house.

"Damn Rukia!" his yell followed.

"Oh it sounds like the lord is consummating the marriage. I'll inform everyone to start the celebration. It's been way too long." a maid said to another.

"That was um…fast." Rukia said.

"What did you expect denying me so long?"

"Guess we'll just have to again." she laughed.

"How about the roof?" she thought he was joking until she saw the look in his eyes.

"I'm game if you are…" she barely had to say anything before he shunpoed her to the roof where he placed her in a curved eave.

"Wait until I get you in my office. I want to play teacher and naughty school girl again. I hope you brought the skirt." he said then kissed her.

"Can I be the teacher this time?"

"Maybe." he said.

The next day in the 6th division captains office…

Rukia was wearing nothing but his captains hayori and holding Senbonsakura…

"Glad I finally found a pin large enough to get that skirt on you. Although your right it doesn't leave much to the imagination." she said taking his otherwise nude body in. "Now get on the desk. You've been a bad cadet and need to be disciplined."

"My apologies captain Rukia. I will accept my punishment." Byakuya said.

She was kneeling on the desk next to him about to spank him with Senbonsakura when the door opened….

"God you two are sick. I'm taking the rest of the day off due to mental trauma and temporary blindness. So sick." Renji said shaking his head and closing the door with them both looking at him.

"He's gone. Where were we? Oh yeah. Whose been a naughty cadet?" Rukia said hitting him on the rear.


	11. Thats Bigamy

Rukia and Renji sat outside on a hot summer day under a shade tree after work. Renji had invited her for sake. It had been a while since they had really talked but it never did seem like they had ever been anything less then the closest of friends. There were some things he was curious about. The rumors spreading through Seiretei about her recent closeness to her brother were rampant and everyone had an encounter story to gossip about.

"Thanks for the sake Renji." Rukia said very drunk but sitting properly and looking in control.

"We should really drink together more. You're my best friend after all and I've missed having you around."

"Me too."

"Remember that time with that guy in the market. He had that fish and you beat him with it?" he laughed.

"Oh yeah. I still remember the look on his face." she laughed hard.

"Who knew back then you were an adult too."

"I didn't realize my age until they told me at the physical for the academy."

"Yeah your almost as old as Taicho. I wonder what you did before you met me?"

"I wonder that myself. I cant remember a thing."

"There's no doubt you could take care of yourself. God that fish thing was funny." he snorted and sake came out of his nose.

"Or that time with that wig and the hose." she laughed.

"Oi if Taicho could have seen you that day."

"He probably would have killed me."

"I doubt it. He likes you way too much, if you know what I mean?"

"Just what are you inferring pineapple head?" she insulted him to get him to change the subject.

"Nothing just I see the way the two of you look at one another. It's kind of sickening. I never thought you would fall for someone like him."

"I did not fall.." she said crossing her arms.

"Rukia you cant lie to me. But if you change your mind…" he raised in eyebrows a few times in innuendo.

"Shut up eyebrows and what's wrong with Byakuya?"

"I always thought you'd go for someone a little rougher." he said flexing his arm.

"Your such an idiot." she laughed.

"Hey when did you start calling him by his first name? And no honorific!"

"It's um a recent thing. He insisted."

"So there's nothing going on huh? So when's the wedding?"

"It's not that serious but…"

"But what?"

"Well the elders have given their blessing if we were to but he hasn't asked or anything."

"If he did would you? You can tell me."

"I um…"

"I got my answer since your face is redder then my hair." Renji said holding his sides from laughing so hard. "Someone said they saw the two of you making out at a bar but I didn't believe it."

"That never happened. We've never actually kissed or anything. I thought it was going to happen a few times but the house is so busy with servants and they interrupt at the worst times. Maybe it was just me thinking the wrong thing anyway. He's my brother." she said getting angry.

"Boy are you off. I don't always pick up on subtle hints, you can ask my ex girlfriend about that one, but one thing I'm sure of is that Taicho is madly in love with you. Although Psychotically may be a better word for it. You know last month a boy from the eighth thought he cold ask your brother to go out on a date with you and Taicho well…Taicho nearly crushed the boy with his riatsu. The poor kid was shaking on the floor. It wasn't the first time something like that happened either. Everyone knows your off limits. Just… I think it's become a form of hazing for the new recruits. They learn really quickly to stay away from you and Taicho. He's not such a bad guy, if he cares for you that much then it's alright with me." Renji said.

"Well I'm glad you approve since I have to clear everything I do with you anyway."

"You aren't any better with my girlfriends." he said crossing his arms.

"It's your own fault for constantly choosing skanks"

"It's not like I was planning on marry any of 'em."

"Damn right you weren't. You have to bring her around for inspection first."

"You make it sound like I want to marry a cow."

"Knowing your taste…I wouldn't put it passed you."

"So Taicho, huh?"

"I don't think I've ever felt this way about anyone. If he doesn't kiss me soon. I'm going to do it."

"That a girl. I'm still shocked the two of you have become so close that you feel comfortable enough to do that."

"We've become really close in the last few months. It happened so suddenly and now I really feel like I know him well enough to be myself around him, in private anyway."

"A friendship is a good way to start. I know another certain friend of yours who could use your special attentions." Renji said placing a hand on her leg.

"I'll give you special attention you perv." she slugged him and they laughed.

Little did either of them know that there was a very handsome Shinigami overhearing their conversation.

"Shit you finally got me drunk you blockhead." she said falling over stiffly.

"Damn Rukia you always did have a dirty mouth. Sixty years with Taicho and you still swear like a drunk sailor."

"It's hard to res…res… *hiccup*restrain myself sometimes."

"I think its time to take you home. Your brother is going to kill me for getting you so drunk." he threw her over his shoulder and he shunpoed away.

"If you're a Shinigami, have a drink, have a drink, if your not a Shinigami, have a drink, have a drink…." Rukia was singing.

"Quiet or Taicho will hear you." Renji said carrying her up to her room.

"You worry too much pineapple. Bya..hiccup….Bya…hiccup, Ni-sama is a pushover."

"Am I Rukia?" Byakuya said coming out of nowhere looking intimidating.

"Taicho!" Renji yelled dropping Rukia with a thud to salute.

"Damn it Renji." she said rubbing her butt.

"Go home Renji." Byakuya said.

"Hai Taicho!" he said leaving very quickly.

"I would ask you why you are in such a state but I am more concerned as to why my lieutenant was carrying you to your room."

"I guess I cant hold my sake. He was just carrying me to my room because I was drunk. It's so not *hiccup* how you think. I'm sorry."

"Not as sorry as you are going to be in the morning. Stand up." he said trying to help her up.

"Where are we going?" she asked as he scooped her up bridal style.

"I'm taking you to your room."

"Hey um Byakuya?" she looked up at him, her arms around his neck.

"Yes Rukia?"

"I um…" she smashed her lips against his and his eyes shot open before he returned her sloppy kiss.

"Rukia?" he questioned.

"If I waited for you to get around to doing it I'll end up an old maid."

"I think we should leave this discussion for the morning."

"And what's wrong with right now?" she demanded.

"You are not sober."

"Oh really well I'm sober enough and I want to discuss it."

"This is not how I wish to remember my proposal."

"Do you really mean it? Your proposing?"

"No you will have to wait until dinner tomorrow. The family will be gathered there to discuss their desire to marry us anyway."

"I hope it wont be a long engagement."

"It will not. One month at the most. I have no desire to wait for you any longer then necessary."

The Kuchiki wedding was a huge event. It did not take long to organize as the ceremony and reception was set to be in the family garden and the already huge army of servants had full knowledge of how to entertain a large group of people at such short notice.

Rukia looked lovely that day dressed in a red and white kimono. All of her friends from the living world had come to witness. Captains, lieutenants, members of the fourth, the entire sixth division, and half of the thirteenth were in attendance. Members of the Kuchiki clan had come from inside and out of Seiretei to attend. A wedding was a rare occurrence and one with a clan head happened usually once every thousand years or so.

The priest and miko went about purifying the area so the ceremony could take place. Rukia came outside and joined Byakuya who waited anxiously for her doing the best he could not to smile. She took his hand and faced the priest. The crowd smiled at the happy scene that was very long overdue.

"If there are any objections as to why these two should not be wed speak now….Then we shall proce…"

"I object!" came a mans voice from the back. The crowd burst out in gossip wondering what was going on. Byakuya was going for his sword ready to kill the interloper.

"Young man, who are you and why do you object?" the priest asked.

"Well it's quite simple. Rukia can not marry him because she's already married to me. I'm just glad I got here in time to stop her from committing a crime. Oh Rukia I'm so glad I found you. I've been looking for so many years." he moved over to try and embrace Rukia and Byakuya pulled her to stand behind him.

"You better have a good explanation for this interruption or I will kill you where you stand." Byakuya said.

"Boy do you have proof?" the priest asked.

"I do. Here are the documents. Her signature is here. I assure you it is very legal."

"Miss Rukia, does this look like your signature?" the priest asked.

"Yeah it does but…"

"How do you know Rukia?" Byakuya demanded.

"It was about eighty years ago when we met. It was in the seventy seventh district. We fell in love and married right away. We were married for five years. Then I was told there was an accident and there was one survivor but she did not remember any thing more then her first name. I had been away for work and by the time I returned…well you know how bad the higher districts are about keeping track of people. By the time I returned she was missing. I looked everywhere for years. I knew she would be alive and then I saw her the other day. I knew she didn't remember me and I knew she wouldn't believe me without evidence. It took longer to find the documents then I thought then I found out today she was going to be married. I of course had to stop the ceremony."

"I am sorry I can not perform the service today." the priest said.

"This is ridiculous there is no way this could be valid after all of these years." Byakuya said.

"I'm afraid it is. I can not express my gratitude to you for taking care of her for so long. But I think it's best that we be going now." he tried to grab hold of her and pull her.

"She is not going anywhere with you." Byakuya said stopping him.

"I can second that." Renji said going to her side.

"Rukia darling don't you recognize me?"

"No I'm sorry I don't."

"You don't know how sad it makes me that you don't know me. But I am so glad you are still alive. Come there must be so much you want to know about you past."

"Yeah there is but it's been so long."

"I want the marriage annulled immediately." Byakuya said.

"She is my wife. I do not believe you have a right to dictate that."

"Please is that…is um…is there a way to get out of our marriage?"

"Rukia we were so happy once. I had such a hope that we could be again. Please just give me a chance. Tell you what spend some time with me. No obligations. If after some time you still want a divorce I will give you one. Is that satisfactory?"

"Well there are things I want to know, and you'll give me a divorce with no question?"

"As you wish all I ask for is a chance. You cant deny me that much."

"Byakuya can I speak to you in private?" Rukia asked.

"Rukia you cant seriously be considering this?"

"What am I supposed to do? There's a whole chunk of my life I cant remember and now it seems I'm married. Don't you trust me?"

"It is him I do not trust. I have no intention of letting you out of my sight."

"It's not like I'm leaving you. All I have to do is give him some time, learn about my past and then it will be over with and we can get married."

"Unless another estranged husband shows himself."

"What's that supposed to mean? You know I had no idea I was married."

"I swear I will kill him if he lays on hand on you." Byakuya said.

"You know how strict the laws are about marriage. There's nothing else that can be done. He practically owns me." she said looking really worried.

"I will agree but Rukia I will not loose you."

"Promise?" she hugged him.

"Keep any eye on the situation." Byakuya said to Renji.

"Hai Taicho!" Renji said.

"Ok whatever your name is, let's get this over with." she said.

"Oshiro Shin."

They sat and had a long discussion. Rukia was told how they met, how they lived, and many details she did not know about.

"Where are you going?"

"Home I live here you know." she said.

"You are my wife and by law you are to come home with me."

"What you cant be serious?"

"I am very serious. I cant very well let you stay in a house unchapperoned with an unmarried man. One of whom you were about to marry."

"But that is my home and you're the stranger."

"Well If you want that divorce…come it's not a mansion like your used to but what it lacks in grandeur it makes up in comfort."

"I need to pack a few things."

"Rukia where are you going?" Byakuya said.

"I um…he insists I stay with him for the duration of our agreement."

"She will not leave this house." Byakuya stated.

"She will come with me. I will not have my wife living with someone she was about to marry and I would like her to have a chance to get used to life with me."

"Rukia was adopted into my family. My documents on her are as valid as yours."

"Yes but she signed those papers while she was still married to me and by law she could not legally agree to anything without my consent."

"My seal supersedes any legalities."

"I can still refuse a divorce. Tell you what how about a compromise? I wouldn't dream of separating her from the family she has known for so long. You can have her over for dinner one weekend a month. If of course you can promise on your honor not to touch my wife."

"Prepare to die." Byakuya said.

"Byakuya please!" Rukia said.

"Yes you cant kill me in cold blood. Even you wont be able to get away with it." Shin said.

"I do not care."

"Please, it's ok. It will be ok. I'll be back here in no time. We just have to get through this somehow and then we can be married." she hugged him.

"How much?" Byakuya said not letting her out of his grip.

"Excuse me?" he said.

"How much will it cost to buy her freedom from you? A hundred thousand?"

"You make it sound like I have enslaved her. How could you think I would want to sell my wife to you for that price."

"Two hundred thousand."

" That is very generous but I am still hoping that when this is over she will honor her vows and choose me. Now if you please, take your hands off of my wife."

Rukia noticed how small the house was. There were many in the same style for Shinigami who were awarded separate living quarters after so many years of service. The whole place wasn't even as large as her bedroom suite at the manor. Rukia tried to adjust to the small one bedroom house. She wanted to sleep on the couch but he wouldn't hear of it and let her take the bedroom.

"Don't look so down my love. I know what will make you feel better…here we are." he pointed to one of the rooms.

"This is the kitchen?" she said wondering exactly what would make her feel better.

"Yes you used to love to cook. Why don't you make us some dinner and we can talk things over."

"I um…um…" she looked around. When she was in the 78th she mostly stole food or ate whatever was burnt over a fire, at the academy it was provided for her, and at the manor servants did all of that.

"Is something the matter?" he asked.

"I've seen a kitchen before in the living world but I…I guess… this is really embarrassing but I don't even know how to put the fire in that." she said pointing at the oven.

"Oh no that is an oven. You just press this button and it heats up."

"Really? Now that is a useful invention." she said impressed.

"Haven't you ever cooked before?"

"Well Bya..Ni…Byakuya-sama doesn't allow me to do any of the servants work. I really only get to dress even myself when I'm in the living world. But I want to try to cook. I might remember something if you say I liked it so much."

"Just ask if you have any questions."

"How hard can it be?" she said getting to work.

All of the food in the refrigerator and a visit from the fire department later….

"I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened." she said.

"Why don't we just get take out tonight and you can try again tomorrow."

"Good morning." Shin greeted.

"Um yeah, where's my coffee." Rukia said looking angry.

"Didn't you sleep well?"

"No." she said biting his head off. "That damn mat must be filled with concrete."

"My love you cant leave your clothes on the floor. Perhaps you can help by doing the laundry."

"Laundry? Um I think we should just be friends. Why don't we hurry this divorce along. I don't think this is going to work out at all." she said hitting the coffee maker a few times before Shin moved it away from her.

"It wont be so bad. You just have to try and clean the clothes."

"How? Don't we just send them out?" she asked.

"No my love you have to wash them in the sink and hang them on the line out back."

"But that will make wrinkles!"

"That's when you use and iron to take them out."

"Iron? I don't think I have time for whatever that is. I have work."

"My you have changed so much. You've been spoiled. That's ok. I'll have you working hard like a woman should in no time."

Rukia had always been a survivor, but she had never once had to do any of the things she was being coerced to do. It had always worked out that she never had to do much domestic work in any of the life she remembered and it was stressing her out fast. Over the last half century she had been waited on and had no clue how to take care of these things and before that she was too poor to have a house to do housework in. After one day she knew that she never wanted to again. She had been spoiled and she could live with that.

"Did you ruin all of the clothes?" Shun asked.

"I um…we can just go and send for more." she didn't believe how bad she was sounding but the words just kept coming out that way. She really had no clue how to do anything he was asking.

"My love we have to live on a budget." he was getting frustrated and she noticed.

"Budget? Oh I take care of that back at the manor. We can just charge it."

"and how do you think we are to pay for it at the end of the month?"

"Um…I am a noble you know." she said smugly.

"I will not have you taking money from them. It is my job to provide for you."

"Yeah real good job your doing of that. I'm sorry I didn't mean to insult your income…"

"Still a spitfire. I should be glad you have been taken care of so well. But now…"

"You'll give me a divorce?" she said with a begging smile.

"No."

Instead of work she headed right over to Byakuya' office.

"…and then it caught on fire and then he made me do the laundry…and then…and then.."

"Rukia I….." Byakuya broke out laughing for the first time in his life.

"It's not funny."

"I really have spoiled you too much."

"It's not like that you ass. I just had no clue how to do any of it. I know how to kill hollow and fill out the proper forms afterwards. I've never had to do any of that stuff before."

"And as soon as you return you will not have to. Has he given any indication of letting you out of your contract sooner? I can not see someone like you being of much use to him."

"What is that supposed to mean?" she said getting angry.

"I was just trying to say that the wife of a normal man needs a spouse who can do domestic work and as you have never been in such a situation …."

"Cant you write a letter exempting me by law from doing laundry?"

"I would but I would not want to anger him into keeping you longer." he was trying to contain his laughter.

"I miss you so much.' she kissed him.

"Why Rukia I do believe this is considered adultery."

"Why'd you have to go and say that? Now we have to stop."

"Rukia?"

"Even if I don't care about him I still cant cheat on him if were married."

"This is going to be a very long month."

"There has to be some way out of this sooner."

"I have an idea!"

"Rukia?"

"I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow for lunch."

"If there is anything I can do to assist you…."

"And how is my spoiled princess this evening?" Shun asked.

"Tired." she said.

"I received an offer of three hundred thousand for you today. He must really want you as his wife."

"It would be good for you if you accepted it." she said plotting.

"No I turned him down. Perhaps you are ready to try to make dinner again."

"I don't feel like it and I already ate. I'm going out." she said now determined to be the worst wife ever and give him a really hard time.

"My love I have to insist you stay home tonight."

"What for? You don't need anything from me."

"Well you are my wife."

"Listen were going to have to set some ground rules. I do not cook, I do not do laundry or whatever sick and twisted chore like thing you have in mind for me. I make enough to send my clothes out and I am provided food at work. If you want that stuff done your going to have to do it yourself. Now bring me a glass of water." she said waving him off.

"My love we have to work together in a marriage."

"I don't think you heard me." she gave him a death glare and put on a façade like her brothers.

"I um…ok." he said fearfully then a knock came at the door.

"Get the door." she commanded.

"Hey Rukia." Renji greeted acting drunk.

"Renji what are you doing here?"

He whispered…"just go with it, I'm saving you."

"Oh god."

"My girlfriend threw me out so need a place to stay and since you're my guardian I'm staying with you."

"Guardian? What does he mean by that?"

"I um." she tried to think of something.

"See I have a legal document. Since she was older then me when we lived together she's by law my adopted mom. I have all the paper work. I missed you MOM."

"Mom? I um yeah my dearest son." she said playing along.

"I'm not sure we have room." Shin said.

"It's ok. I see your already on the couch so I can sleep with Rukia since she's my mom you cant object to that." Renji said with a smirk.

"This is crazy." Shin said.

"You wont turn my son away will you? It would make me really sad and might even cause legal problems. People would say oh poor Rukia her husband wont let her keep her child."

"I guess he can stay. But he has to sleep on the floor."

"Oh good. And weren't you going to cook dinner. I have to warn you Renji eats like a horse."

…

"Hey pass me the curry." Renji said spitting food everywhere Rukia tried not to laugh. "Is there more food? I'm still hungry."

"Get Renji more food." Rukia commanded, she felt really bad about torturing the man but it had to be done.

"Oh ok." he said filling another bowl of rice. "Rukia darling would you please try harder to help out here."

"Sure I'll get right on it." she said.

The following day…

"…well there is nothing else I can do. I have read every law on the subject and even he central 46 cant intervenes. Do you think I am not as frustrated as you are?" Byakuya said.

"I just want to come home. I don't have any memory of this guy whatsoever. I thought he would at least seem familiar." Rukia said.

"Has he laid his hands on you? I will kill him if he does and I do not care about the consequences."

"Nothing is going on, don't worry."

"There had better not be."

"Do you really think I would, with him?" she yelled.

"You married him once did you not?"

"What's that supposed to mean? Your being an ass and I don't want to argue."

"Everyday you are with him I fear is another day closer to losing you."

"You will not lose me. I am getting out of this as soon as possible."

"He refused my offer again." Byakuya said.

"I know. That moron. That was a lot to refuse and where did Renji get that document?"

"It is not difficult to fake records from Inuzuri."

"Really it isn't?"

"No and the laws do support Abarai' claim. I would really like to see the marriage documents."

"He keeps those with him at all times. I can't get to them."

"Really? I have more work to do, If you can get away later you know where my room is."

"I might take you up on that."

…

"Welcome home darling." Shin said.

"Whatever." she said.

"Seven hundred thousand was offered for you today but I would never part with you for that." he said.

"Whatever. I'm going out after I change." she said.

"Won't you stay home?"

"No I have plans."

"The dishes are piling up would you at least wash them?"

"Sure." she said walking toward the kitchen.

"Good now were getting along." he said placing a kiss on her cheek.

A loud crash was heard followed by a series of more loud crashes and bangs.

"What are you doing darling?" Shin asked a vein noticeably popping out of his temple and a twitch in his left eye.

"They slipped."

"All of them?"

"Yes. Soap is slippery." she said.

"You are a handful my love."

"Whatever I'm out of here."

Rukia made her way to the manor and found a very welcoming Byakuya in the garden.

"Someone will see us." she said.

"I do not care who sees us." he said kissing her and rolling on top of her.

"Rukia how could you! I never thought you would do something like this. Adultery is a crime." Shun said dramatically.

"Oh this cant be good." Rukia said.

"He will destroy the documents for sure after this." Byakuya said.

"Good. Now let's finish what we started." she said kissing him.

…

"Kuchiki Byakuya, Kuchiki Rukia I am here to charge the both of you. Kuchiki Taicho you are under house arrest but Rukia-chan you must come with me." Hisagi said.

"What is this a joke?" she said.

"Its no joke Rukia-chan. I'm really sorry but It's my job." Hisagi said.

"What is the charge?" Byakuya asked.

"Fornication with the wife of another man for you and adultery for you Rukia. Ridiculous if you ask me. Everyone cheats." Hisagi said.

"I will contact a solicitor to see if we can avoid court. The scandal this is going to cause." Byakuya said.

"Is that all you can think about?" Rukia said.

"The things I do for you Rukia. You always manage to get me into the strangest situations." he said.

"Oh well don't do me any favors. It's not like you did the last time I was arrested anyway."

"I thought we were passed that…incident." he said.

"We are I'm sorry. I'm just so…everything's just going wrong. I shouldn't be taking out on you. My life is just falling apart and…and…"

"Oh for god sakes do not cry its unbecoming." he said.

"Your such an insensitive bastard sometimes." she said.

"Rukia neither of us are suitable for anyone else."

"Anyone sane anyway." she said.

"That is why we belong together. We will fight this do not worry. But for now enjoy your cell. It will make you appreciate me more."

"I hate you."

"Relax I have a plan." he said.

"Yeah to get me hung."

"Have I disappointed you yet?"

"Do you want me to answer that?" she said.

"Lately I mean." he said.

"Come on Rukia I have other work to do." Hisagi said dragging her away.

…

Byakuya found a note waiting for him that evening.

'Ten million and I will make this go away. - Shin"

Byakuya crumbled the paper realizing what had happened but needed to find a way to prove it.

'No' was his reply.

…

"Court will now come to order the honorable judge…."

"I thought you said this wouldn't make it to court." Rukia said to Byakuya.

"Do not worry I told you I have a plan." he was hoping it would work out.

…

"How much will damage be if he wins?" Matsumoto asked Yumichika as they sat in the back to watch.

"I believe the they are going for a hundred million." Yumichika said.

"Can he really get that much?" she asked in shock.

"Probably half that but I've seen worse in these cases." he said.

"Oh my." Matsumoto said.

….

"Osho Shin vs. Kuchiki- Osho Rukia. The charge is Adultery." a man stated.

"Your honor I intend to prove that my client Kuchiki Rukia is fully innocent in all wrong doing As she was seduced by this pervert who calls himself her brother." the lawyer said as everyone gasped at hearing him call Byakuya a pervert.

"I object as they are both consenting adults. Unless you can prove abuse you can not say he seduced her." the prosecution said.

"Oh I fully intend to prove abuse and I have evidence and character witnesses who will attest to his wretched behavior and treatment over the years." the defense stated.

"Oh god." Rukia said slapping her head.

"By all means call your first witness." the judge said.

"I call Abarai Renji to the stand."

"Please state your position and captain."

"I'm lieutenant of the sixth division under captain Kuchiki." Renji said.

"So you work directly under Kuchiki-taicho? Would you tell the court in your own words what it is like to work with him."

"Well um he's really demanding and likes us to work extra hard. A real perfectionist."

"How do you feel about your captain?"

"Well I respect him a lot."

"and why do you respect him?"

"Because he's strong and he scares the hell out of me."

"Scares the hell out of you, you say. Tell me has he ever threatened you?"

"Well yeah all the time but it's not like he would really hurt me."

"You are under oath Abarai-san. Has he ever injured you when you have displeased him?'

"Well just that one time when I tried to ask him if I could take Rukia out. I was only in the 4th for two days so its no big deal. Oh yeah and when I hugged Rukia he set his sword on me and then there was the time I was alone with Rukia and…"

"So it is safe to say he is very protective of his…sister?"

"Well yeah there isn't anything he wouldn't do for her to keep her safe."

"Really and has he in your opinion ever gone too far in that endeavor?"

"Well what'd you mean like not letting her out of the house? Cuz that's definitely something he does with her too often."

"And before the Aizen issue what was he like?"

"Oh he was really scary. Didn't care for anyone or anything."

"And what was his reaction to the news of Rukia' execution."

"That's not fair to bring up."

"Answer the question."

"Well he didn't seem to care and when we tried to rescue her he stopped us and nearly killed me in doing so."

"And why do you think he wanted his sister dead."

"Objection!"

"Overruled."

"I don't really know I guess it was to get her out of his hair since she reminded him of his old wife so much. Sorry Taicho."

"Your witness."

"Abarai-san you are very close to Rukia are you not?"

"Yeah were best friends since we were kids."

"That is sweet so it is safe to say you know just about everything about her?"

"Absolutely she tells me everything."

"Good so does she love Kuchiki-taicho?"

"Yes."

"and has he ever to your knowledge hit her, beat on her, injure her in any way to leave a temporary or permanent mark upon her body?"

"No he'd never harm her. Of that I'm sure."

"Has she in anyway implied that she has been mentally or emotionally abused?"

"Well I mean for the time we weren't allowed to be friends she seemed not herself and I can say the fact that he didn't care for her for so long really took a toll on her spirits. He really broke her. It's a good thing he changed his mind and they're happy now."

"Um let the record show that they are happy now. No further questions."

"I have one more your honor. You did say that he did not care for her for nearly sixty years and she did not seem herself because of the treatment?"

"Yeah."

"No further questions for this witness. My next witness is Kyione Kotetsu. You know Rukia well. You've worked with her for over sixty years. Has she in the past mentioned her brother?"

"Yes."

"and what has she said about him?"

"Well she said on many occasions how much she respects him and wants to please him but she always complains of not living up to his expectations. She also says he used to never look at her and barely acknowledges her. But I think that's changed."

"Over the years have you seen this adverse affect her work?"

"I cant lie it has. She spent many years very withdrawn from not feeling adequate enough. But she has always worked really hard in spite of her gloomy demeanor."

"Would you attribute her gloomy demeanor to her household life?"

"Oh yeah definitely she's' much more outgoing when she's away from her home for a long time. But she's been a lot happier over the last year."

"and why do you think that is?"

"Well she's planning to marry Kuchiki-taicho for one."

"Really and is the marriage consensual?"

"I um I really don't know nobles have stricter customs."

"Do female nobles get to choose their husbands so easily?"

"Objection!"

"Sustained."

"No further questions. Your witness."

"Miss Kotetsu has the defendant ever expressed joy over her pending marriage to Kuchiki-taicho?"

"Why yes all of the time. She loves him deeply."

"Have you ever seen any behavior that would in anyway seem abusive?"

"No he'd never hurt her."

"That's all."

"Here's my next witness state your name and occupation."

"Kurosaki Ichigo substitute Shinigami."

"Would you say you know Miss Kuchiki well?"

"Yeah that's pretty obvious."

"how well do you know lord Kuchiki?"

"It's not like you've been saying about him. He really loves Rukia."

"Please answer the question. How well do you know Kuchiki-sama?"

"Not really that well."

"What was your first encounter with him like?"

"Well he tried to kill me but stopped thanks to Rukia."

"And the second time you met him?"

"Uh well he tried to kill me again but Yoroichi saved me and trained me so I could fight him the next time we met."

"And did you?"

"Yeah."

"How did that go?"

"Well it ended in a draw when neither of us could continue."

"And why were you fighting him?"

"Well I thought it was because he wanted to kill Rukia. I could see that he really didn't want to but had to follow the law so when he threw the battle in my favor and called a stalemate he could stop trying to kill her and still save face. Then he went to save her too"

"What did he say exactly about killing Rukia?"

"Well it went something like After I kill you I will Kill Rukia with my own hand. Sorry but it's what you said." he looked over at Byakuya.

"Ni-sama! How could you say that." she whacked him.

"What kind of monster says that about his little sister? I say ladies and gentlemen of the jury that this is more then enough proof to prove she has been so abused by this sicko over the years that she was unable to resist when he took advantage of his little sister. How could she say no when she like everyone else fears him. I wouldn't be surprised if he forced himself on her."

"Objection!"

"We can do this all day I have many more who will attest to this atrocious behavior and her inadequacy issues. I call Kuchiki-taicho to the stand."

"Kuchiki sama you have been married before have you not?"

"Yes."

"And Kuchiki Rukia was the sister of your late wife?"

"Yes."

"Is it true that you were unable to look at her for nearly sixty years because of the resemblance to you late wife."

"Partly."

"What are the other reasons?"

"I did not wish to get close to her for fear of losing someone I close to me."

"So instead of welcoming her. You alienated her, ignored her, isolated her from her friends, imposed impossible standards, and when it came down to it you chose your own twisted sense of duty over her life."

"Objection Kuchiki-taicho is not on trial here, at least not today."

"It is fine I will answer. It is true. I have made grave errors."

"And would you call your past actions abusive?"

"Yes I would. My treatment of Rukia is unforgivable." a gasp and a pause from everyone in the room followed the confession.

"No further questions."

"Kuchiki-sama, you worked hard to gain the rank of captain and life must be fairly difficult with all of your responsibilities so its not hard to say that anyone would be in a disagreeable manner once in a while."

"Yes."

"You have lived with the defendant a long time?"

"Yes."

"So it is safe to say you know a lot about her?"

"yes."

"So you know that the defendant isn't the sweet and innocent sister she appears to be. She has been known to cohort with married men before in one Shiba Kaien."

"Objection. There is no evidence of her association with him being more then friendship."

"Withdrawn. So she resembles her sister. Tell me does she dress like her so she can tempt you."

"I will kill you." Byakuya said drawing his sword.

"Please remove the witness." the judge said. " This case is recessed until we can have a full psychological examination of the defendant."

…

"Doctor what was your conclusion of miss Kuchiki's psychological state."

"Well I believe her to suffer from slight post traumatic stress disorder and self esteem issues."

"and what is the root of these self esteem issues."

"I believe it stems from the household."

"No further questions."

"Doctor is the defendant sane?"

"Why yes."

"And is she able to make decisions for herself?"

"Yes."

"Do you believe Kuchiki-sama forced himself on her?"

"No."

"Is she in love with him on her own free will."

"Yes."

….

"The jury will return in one hour with a decision." the judge said.

…

"What the heck. That was our defense? There going to be back in less then ten minutes. Oh my god I'm going to be executed again." Rukia said.

"Do not worry.' Byakuya said.

"You keep saying that and look where we are now. This has been going on for two months. Sure you don't care, I'm the one who gets the prison time while you stay home and the only outcome is parting with some money you wont even miss." She yelled.

"Your going to appreciate me more very soon."

"Great maybe you can get my sentence down to five hundred years."

"You know I really have spoiled you. It seems I am going to have to show you who is in charge when this is over and when this is over you will marry me and I will make you appreciate me properly."

"Lawyer-san I'm feeling abused." she said.

"Well don't tell me. Fall on the floor or something. There isn't much time. We can delay this if your in the hospital." the lawyer said.

The jury entered the room.

"What is the verdict?"

Everyone sat in suspense as a man stood up ready to speak.

"We the jury find Kuchiki- Rukia guilty of the heinous crime of adultery."

"Does the guilty have anything to say?"

"No the heck with it, I give up." Rukia said.

"Wait!" a man yelled running in. "Wait I have important evidence!"

"What is it?" the judge asked.

"I have a pre-existing marriage document that pre dates the one with Osho shin."

"Oh god." Rukia said.

"Oh there's another husband." Yachiru commented as Kenpachi laughed.

"I must have a moment to authenticate the document." the judge said.

"I swear I'm moving to Hueco Mundo." Rukia said.

"Well it is indeed authentic." the judge said.

"No it isn't see I have the forger with me and he did the forgery for Osho Shin."

"Is this true?"

"Yes I was promised a large sum but then he told me he would not give me a dime so I took the information to Kuchiki-sama who paid me a nice sum for this forgery to prove I did the other." the man said.

"I see. In light of this new evidence the case is dismissed and the charges dropped. Miss Kuchiki is free to go and the charges against Kuchiki-sama are no longer valid." the judge said.

…

"Rukia where is the kitchen staff?" Byakuya demanded.

"It's a holiday they should be back in time to make dinner."

"I am hungry now, go and cook me something." he demanded.

"Listen Mr. Demanding. You promised I wouldn't have to go back into a kitchen after I married you. I don't know how to cook but I know how to turn the oven on." she said.

"Do you not know how to do anything? I will have to show you how it is done." he said dragging her to the kitchen.

A visit from the fire department later….

"So that is how it's done?" she said smugly.

"It was faulty wiring."

"Yeah and I'm sure that fish just burst into flames on its own."

"I doubt you could have made a more impressive fire."

"Really? You should ask the fireman. I can assure you my fire was more impressive and just you wait until the laundry women take the afternoon off, I'll show you." she said.

"I am sure I can do better then you." he said.

"Let's go now."

"Let's."


	12. Auctions And Innuendo

Auctions And Innuendo

"Don't make me do this." Rukia complained.

"Loosen up Rukia. It's for charity….Done!" the blonde said with a comb in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other.

"It's so degrading." Rukia said looking down at her half nude body with the letter K carved out of her pubic hair.

"This year even the captains have to attend. Not that Kyoraku-Taicho ever needed to be forced. Your brother will be amusing, especially if he gets competitive." Matsumoto said.

"He wont do any such thing. His dignity wouldn't allow it. He's has too much pride. I'll bet he even hides his eyes like a proper gentleman." Rukia said.

"You really need to learn more about men. I doubt that hot brother of yours is dead from the neck down. A very nice letter K Rukia. For Kuchiki. It should be obvious who it belongs to. I wonder who will bid for you?"

"Since you're the only blonde, I think everyone will bid on you. What did you make it look like?"

"Take a look." she said opening her kimono.

"An arrow pointing to the goods. That's hilarious. Hisagi-sans going to have a fit if he doesn't win."

"Oh no he's the auctioneer this year and I can't wait to see your brothers face when he looks at those photos and realizes one has to be yours. He's going to flip."

"I'll probably be killed." Rukia said.

"Don't worry too much the fun parts wont be photographed. We did have to blur some photos but if we take this one just right…there." Matsumoto said taking the picture.

See you later Matsumoto." she said leaving the lieutenants quarters feeling dirty.

"Oh hey Renji. I'm glad I ran into you can you do me a favor?" Rukia said.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Come here I can't say it out loud." she said whispering the situation into his ear and blushing.

"Rukia! Sure I'll bid for ya. I was planning to anyway so thanks for the heads up." Renji said.

Rukia went home and thought a bath would do her good. Hairs from the shaving and trimming were sticking to her skin and she wanted to wash them off. Well that and she did feel a little dirty being in such an intimate situation with another woman.

When she got out of the tub she couldn't find her maid and lack of a maid meant lack of a towel. She had no other option but to walk nude back into her room yet again. Wrapped up in her own mind as she left the room she looked up and stared stunned right into the face of Byakuya.

His eyes were wide and he forgot how to move. Then he gave her a predatory look as his eyes groped her body. Noticing the carving of a K he got a hard on and as soon as he realized what he was doing he excused himself as quickly as he could.

They were both really embarrassed after that and a feint blush could even be seen on his face at dinner. Both tried to ignore what had happened and act normally.

"Does Nii-sama like the way it's decorated? Let me give you some. I bet I know what part you'd like to eat." she said looking at the small cake in the image of a bunny as he stared at her because of what she just said. Then he realized she was referring to the cake.

"I will take some head." he said then his eyes widened and he corrected himself. "Ahem! I will have a slice of the head I mean." If anyone would believe it possible Byakuya had turned very red in the face and was trying his hardest to look his normally emotionless self.

"That's the best part. The inside has the most cream and I love the way it drips out after you've put it into your mouth." she said excitedly then realized what she had just said sounded like and dropped her tea on her kimono.

"Rukia are you alright?" he said.

"Yeah I just got really wet…oh god." she said her cheeks completely flushed.

"I hope it was not too hot." he said in his normal stoic manner.

"Well it's never too hot for my tastes." she said referring to the tea.

"Perhaps no one has done it for you properly yet." he hinted not showing any emotion.

"It's always best when I take care of it myself." she said as she calmed.

"I shall assist you next time and show you how to get it properly heated." and he meant what he said and it make her flustered again.

"I'm going to my room now and get off…I mean get this off. You know like change into something else that's um dry?" she said getting up and trying to leave the room.

"I certainly hope you can come." he said enjoying her reaction and her innocent look.

"What!" she said with a jerk of her head.

"I said I hope you can come to the garden this evening and we can have a game of Go…If you wish. Do not make me repeat myself."

"I…I…I…I yeah I'll come as soon as I get off…this off. I mean….I gotta go." she said and ran off.

He was feeling rather self satisfied at the moment. She had looked so cute when she got all flustered and embarrassed. He was still a man after all and seeing all of her earlier was driving him to the edge. Somehow he had to let her know he was interested in her without being too obvious or giving her any chance to reject him for her silly reasons.

A Kuchiki is used to having many things. Anything they want actually. Byakuya Kuchiki was no exception to the rule and what he wanted he got. She would surely again refuse him on some moral issue like she did when they accidentally kissed. There had to be some way to get her in the same room with him in a more intimate manner. She would have to feel obligated to stay. It may be underhanded but he was controlling that way.

Rukia was nervous about the situation going on in her house. Her brother had not been acting very brotherly lately and she had yet to get over the fact that he was her brother in law. What she was suffering and struggling with the most was that she liked the attention and began to desire him in a way she had fought against for years.

"Rukia it is your move." Byakuya said.

"What's the point? You're going to win anyway." Rukia said.

"Allow me to show you the right moves, you will not be displeased."

"If I let you show me, what's the guarantee that it'll turn out the way I want?"

"We both have the same goal. Let us reach it together. Come here." he said holding out his hand. She took it and he pulled her back to his chest as she sat in front of him between his legs.

Rukia began to breathe a bit heavier with him so close. "Um…so show me." she said.

"Gladly." he said about to kiss her.

"Where should I place the next one?" she asked dodging the kiss.

"Here." he said placing his right arm over hers on the board.

Her heart was pounding. "I…um…" was all she could say. He was using his other hand to slowly drag the hem of her kimono up her leg.

"You what Rukia?" he said into her ear trailing his nose down her neck which she cocked to the side when she felt the heat of his breath caressing it. They were both about to explode.

"Your lordship? Oh excuse me your lordship, my lady. An urgent message has come for you." the servant said handing him the letter then leaving quickly realizing the two would be in a bad mood after being interrupted.

"What is it?" she asked Byakuya who was reading the letter in one hand and still holding her in the other.

"Nothing of any consequence, my fifth seat is trapped in a wall."

"How did that happen?"

"I do not know, but it seems I have to file a form before they can get him out."

"So you have to go then." she said still in his tight embrace.

"Regrettably." he said hugging her tightly.

"I was planning on getting to bed early anyway." she said.

"So was I." he said kissing her on the forehead and getting up.

"I'll walk with you to the front gate." she said.

"I am unsure how long it will take."

"Then I guess I'll see you for breakfast." she said.

He left in a very bad mood. Who on earth gets themselves trapped in a wall? What was worse was that he was interrupted because no one would attempt a rescue until he signed off on it, what kind of silly procedure is that?

He arrived at the scene and his man was indeed trapped in the wall. Half his body sticking out of one end and the rear sticking out of the other. A ton of people were buzzing around looking at his back end, while his protests could be heard from the other side.

Some people were standing around talking others were running back and forth in a fit of confusion. There was a guy with a sledge hammer on standby and another with what looked like giant tweezers, a wrecking ball, and a Byakuya didn't even want to know who thought to bring a goat or what they were planning to use it for, which was grazing on some grass under the guys dangling feet.

"Kuchiki-Taicho! I'm so glad you're here!" Renji yelled excitedly then saluted.

"Abarai I do not even want to know how this happened. Where is the document?"

"Here sir." Renji handed him the form.

"Did you bring a pen or am I supposed to sign this with Senbonsakura?"

"A pen a pen." he searched his uniform. "Does anyone have a pen!" Renji yelled.

'Idiots, I am surrounded by idiots. They call me here for this? It is like a bad joke. How many idiot Shinigami does it take to free an ass?" he thought to himself and suppressed a smile.

"Here Taicho!" Renji said holding out a pen.

"It is done." Byakuya said throwing the form at Renji, the pen bouncing off of his forehead, then drawing Senbonsakura and freeing the squirming man from the wall with a small explosion.

The workers looked disappointed then looked at Byakuya with blank stares then everyone looked at one another.

"I didn't expect it to be that easy." one person said.

"Well I could have gotten him out by doing it that way." another said.

"Yeah well you didn't do anything but pull on his legs." a man said.

"Well you were pulling on his arms." another man commented.

"Yeah and while both of us were pulling, he didn't budge an inch, did he?"

"I don't get to use old sledgy." the guy with the sledgehammer said.

"Baaaahhh!" the goat sounded walking off.

The next day the auction for dates with single girls for charity took place. Many were in attendance, all of the captains, who had the larger paychecks, were required to attend and bid this year.

"Since last year was such a bust, we've decided to make things more interesting this year. Each girl has trimmed their special hair…down there, to give you a hint as to who they are. You're going to bid on the photo of the art work. Of course you wont see anything vulgar, thanks to a certain complainer." Hisagi looked at Nannao. "The winner gets to go out with the matching girl for the night."

"First up is picture A. Quite impressive actually I think it's a pink cat. Let's start the bidding at one hundred. Do I hear one hundred?…We have one hundred do I hear two?"

"Two." some shouted.

"Two hundred do I hear three? Come one guys who wants to pet this kitty?" Hisagi said.

"Three hundred!" another called.

"Great do I hear four?…Three fifty…three fifty?…great we have four….four hundred…Five….six hundred going once, going twice…Sold! To Kenpachi-Taicho for six hundred dollars, do enjoy sir." Hisagi said and Yachiru bounced to her captain.

"Next up is this lovely jet black letter K. Bidding starts at one hundred dollars."

"One hundred!" Renji shouted.

"We have one hundred from lieutenant Abarai do I hear two? … Come on guys this is the milky whitest flesh I've seen in a long time. Don't let Abarai intimidate you guys, this is a once in a lifetime chance for sure." Hisagi said looking at Rukia and she tried to hide her blush.

"Two hundred." Kira called to get under his friends skin.

"I'll kill you. She's off limits!" Renji screamed.

"Three hundred." Yamamoto said after finding out who it was. "It's very difficult to find someone who can properly serve tea."

"Three hundred….we have four….five hundred…five hundred…this is indeed a rare girl and we guarantee she comes with out a chaperone this time." Hisagi said and the bids became competitive.

"Six hundred." Kyoraku bid after hearing that she would be alone.

"Seven hundred. I feel too responsible for Rukia to let you have her alone." Ukitake said.

"Eight hundred." Kyoraku said. "A rare flower indeed."

"Nine hundred!" Renji shouted frustrated.

"One thousand." Kurotoshi said. "I can think of several things I would like to do with her."

"No Eleven!" Renji shouted.

"Twelve." Kyoraku said.

"Thirteen." Kurotoshi said.

"Fifteen hundred." Ukitake called protectively.

"Two thousand!" Renji yelled wondering where he was going to get the money.

"Twenty one hundred." Kurotoshi said. "I can really use her."

"I wont let you! Twenty five." Renji said.

"Really where are you going to get twenty five? Twenty nine!" Kira said saving his friend.

"Three thousand." Kyoraku said.

"I think you should stop bidding. Thirty one hundred." Ukitake said.

"Oh but she's so innocent old friend. Thirty four." Kyoraku said.

"That's the problem …old friend. She wont be when your done with her. Four thousand." Ukitake bid as the two men bickered politely.

"I'll take her for eight thousand. She'd make a good wife. She just needs to get to know me a bit and she wont refuse. It'll be a good match for my family." Ohmaeda called.

"Eight thousand!…I believe we have a new record. Eight thousand going once…"

"Twenty thousand." a deep assertive voice called and all heads turned and the room quieted.

"Come again? Did Kuchiki-Taicho say something?" Hisagi said the smile on his face gone.

"Twenty thousand. Do not make me repeat myself again." Byakuya said.

"Twenty five." Ohmaeda said and all the heads that were looking at Byakuya turned to him.

"Thirty five." Byakuya said.

"Forty. I've got money too." Ohmaeda said trying to beat Byakuya.

"One hundred." Byakuya said.

"Huh? No female is worth that." Ohmaeda said.

"One…one…one… one hundred thousand! Sir you honor us. Sold! Sold! Sold! The children thank you….here's your girl….go on Rukia." Hisagi said practically throwing Rukia at him.

"Nii-sama what on earth!" she asked as everyone watched them leave with her trailing behind him.

"Do not question me Rukia. Are you not ashamed of your involvement?"

"I'm sorry I'm really embarrassed."

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about." he said handing her the photo.

"Oh." she looked up at him wide eyed with nothing to say as she followed him back to their house.

"You are no doubt wondering why I bid on you." he said after they entered the house.

"Well yeah I was." she said as he urged her to follow him.

"We are here." he said opening the doors to his room.

"Nii-sama?" she questioned at all of the candles, rose petals on the plush futon. "You didn't have to do all of this, I mean I can leave if you want. It was nice of you to save me and all but don't force yourself to spend time with me."

"I have already made plans for us this evening and I paid quite a bit for your company and I mean to get my monies worth." he said.

"Nii-sama!" she exclaimed in nervous shock.

"By morning you will not be referring to me that way again." he sat her on the futon and all she could do was look up at him with a mixture of desire and confusion as she took the glass of champagne he handed her.


	13. Daydreams

Daydreams

"That was fun Rukia. Let's go out again tomorrow." Renji said.

"Sure Renji. See you." she said turning into her hallway and finding herself inches from the overbearing presence of her brother.

"You are late." he stated.

"Gomen. I was out with Renji." she bowed and rushed to her room not wanting to deal with the stern look on his face.

Byakuya was not very happy with the situation. Sure Abarai was one of her closest friends and he was a decent enough person, but he was in the way. Byakuya didn't travel all the way to Hueco Mundo to protect her just so she could run off with his daft lieutenant.

Rukia was in the habit of sitting outside in the garden after she changed for bed. The recent weather was exceptional and she decided to enjoy it to it's fullest. Byakuya watched her from the main house. When he could no longer take watching her lie on the ground in such a seductive way he decided to join her.

"It is late." he said and sat beside her.

"Do you ever have anything else to say to me?" she said sitting up next to him.

"Yes, but it is late." he said trying not to look at her, and failing.

"Well yeah it is." she said looking at him and he didn't say much else. "It's nice to finally be home. I know the battle wasn't of much interest for you because your so strong and all, but it's a relief for me. I'm really glad you came for me." she said putting her head on his shoulder.

"Rukia it is…"

"If you say it's late one more time…" she angered and he put his arm around her to calm her.

"That's not what I was going to say." he said, but it was. So he said the next thing he could come up with. "It required no thought. I will not leave you."

"Promise?" she asked dozing off in his arms.

"We will not be parted again Rukia." he said as he picked her up and took her to her room.

The next day Rukia was enjoying lunch with her brother. As they ate closely on the porch.

"Isn't it good Nii-sama?"

"Rukia please stop referring to me like that. Please call me by my given name and you may drop the honorific when we are alone." he said placing his hand on her face and in her hair, trying to pull her closer.

She looked coy and made no gesture to stop him. A rice bowl fell to the ground and he had pulled her to his lap, she wrapped her legs around him and his arms made their way quickly around her small body. Sparks of riatsu were flying in every direction as he was about to claim her eager mouth.

"Rukia! Where are you? What are you doing?" Renji questioned at the two in the odd position.

"Um…I got caught on Byakuya-sama's hayori." she said and he nodded in agreement looking unamused.

"Oh ok. You ready?" Renji asked.

"Too ready." she said getting up hesitantly and noting the mixture frustration under his uninterested facade.

Later….

"Quiet Rukia. You'll wake everyone and I don't want your brother catching me taking you to your room." Renji urged.

"I can't help*hiccup* it." she said.

"There's going to be a murder if your brother hears us."

"I'm not the one whose going to get *hiccup* murdered." she said.

"Yeah that's what I'm worried about. Oh no!" he said looking at his angry captain in his night kimono. "Sir I'm sorry to disturb…"

"I expect an explanation as to why Rukia is inebriated? If this continues I will not allow you to take her out of this house again." Byakuya said.

"Nemu and the punch. *hiccup* drank too much *hiccup." she said.

"Sir lieutenant Nemu tried to test her new invention on us. She spiked the punch."

"Why are you not intoxicated as well?" Byakuya asked.

"I had the sake." Renji said

"Like five drinks without the hangover.* hiccup* I hope they start selling this." she said looking pretty happy. "Hey sexy." she said with a wink, a tilt of her head upward, and a curved smile to her brother like a pimp.

"Hand her over Abarai." Byakuya said moving closer to them.

"Yes sir." he said passing her to his captain.

"Later…big red." she said and chuckled evilly.

"Good night Rukia." he said a smile creeping on his face.

"Get out of my house Abarai." Byakuya said, taking Rukia into his room and closing the door. After he let her rest on his bed for a bit he couldn't help but stare at the sly smile on her face and seductive look she started to give him "Rukia, are you well enough to go to your room?"

"Mom Byakuya I'm cold, warm me." she said tossing her kimono across the room after pulling the covers on, it was a difficult request for him to resist but he was enough of a gentlemen to not take advantage of her in her state. There was no telling what the side effects of whatever it was the twelfth division had given her and this seamed like one.

He lay next to her and she cuddled into him, her hot lips on his neck, her hand rubbing his chest and her bare torso flush against him, her exposed leg over his. She was so hot in a place he was trying not to think about but it was rubbing his leg.

At the moment he was wondering why he hadn't thought about carrying her to her room and what possessed him to lay next to her, actually it was simple, the blood from his brain was draining south with every breath she took.

"We should make this a more permanent arrangement." he said out loud his heart rate speeding.

"No I don't want to marry you…Renji, quit asking. I'm hungry for something else." she said and her hand had already untied his obi. She reached under his kimono took him into her small hand and began to stroke him, he was already rock hard for her before the ministrations.

"Rukia, you should not…I….no…" he couldn't say much more because of the way she was touching him. There was no way he could find the resolve to stop her.

"Shhhh." she said her eyes closed shut as she moved her head between his legs and put him in her mouth.

"You better not think I am Abarai." he said not resisting and then his mind had gone completely blank.

When it was over Rukia just moved right back next to him and held onto him tightly. He was still in shock about what had just happened and was laying there, his eyes wide and breathing heavily, thinking about what just happened.

"I hope Byakuya-sama's happy." she said and fell completely asleep.

He looked over at her, still panting. "Very happy Rukia."

The next morning Rukia was very confused as to why she was in her brothers bed, in his arms, not to mention naked. She was looking around the room trying to remember, but she couldn't.

"Stop squirming." he said then pressed his morning hard on to her rear and slid it between her wet thighs.

"Byakuya!" she yelled her eyes so wide they were about to fall out of her head.

"What Rukia? It is very early for yelling." he said

"What are you doing in bed with me!" she exclaimed.

"You may have noticed that this is my bed." he said pulling her back toward him but she got out of his grip and sat up.

"What am I…How did you…How did we…Did we?"

"What exactly do you remember?" he asked.

"Um well I was talking to Matsumoto, she just got her hair done, new highlights, and we were laughing and eating then Nemu served us some drinks but I can't remember anything after that…wait it's hazy but I remember Renji talking and I felt like I was floating. He must have taken me home. I think he proposed….Then I remember you saying something about mistaking you for Abarai, like that would happen… But I still have no clue how I got here."

"You had ingested an unknown potion from the twelfth division. I did not wish to leave you alone in such a state with unknown consequences. You were also complaining you were cold and could not get warm." It wasn't a lie, he just omitted a few tiny details of the evening.

"Oh well it was very nice of you to take care of me." she said with a sincere smile.

"It was my pleasure. It may be wise for me to watch you again this evening." he said and something in his voice made her blush.

"Um I have a date with Renji tonight. I might be late." she said and he noticeably gritted his teeth.

This was not going according to plan, although there wasn't much of a plan to begin with.

Later….

"Bya-kun wanna play?" The little pink haired lieutenant popped up from under the floorboards.

"Not right now Yachiru." Byakuya said.

"Where's Ru-chan?"

"Rukia is out with Abarai."

"Oh, Bya-kun doesn't look very happy about that, Don't worry. Buy her a present, something pink."

"A present?" he questioned, entertaining the idea in his mind.

"Sure like in the book Ru-chan lent me. I came to give it back to her." she held out the book.

"This is what she reads?" he said looking at the half naked man on the cover.

"Yep. Romance is fun. I liked the book. But there were lots of things I didn't understand. Um… Bya-kun, what's a big throbbing purple flaming hard member? Kenny wouldn't tell me."

"I think you should ask lieutenant Matsumoto." he said.

"I bet it's some sort of new candy."

"It is possible." he said not making eye contact.

"Then I better get some." and the pink haired girl left.

"Purple." he commented with a chuckle.

He realized the book might be a way to encourage Rukia to seek him out again. Flipping through the pages, he noticed in the first part of the book the girl had a secret admirer. Skipping ahead a few chapters, it had got the lead man laid. This was going to be his angle and the book was going to be used as a checklist.

Wondering about how to begin, he didn't want her to think someone was stalking her. Flowers might be the best option.

"Lord Kuchiki, we are honored." the man at the flower shop said.

"I require flowers."

"What kind would you like? We have many varieties."

"The romantic kind."

"What price range are we looking at?"

"Money is of no consequence."

"I see, well then leave it to me." shop keep said.

"I will also ask for your discression in the matter."

"We keep our clients in the strictest of confidence."

"I also wish to incorporate the number six."

Rukia was in her office stamping forms when a delivery boy arrived with a bouquet of six dozen red roses.

"You want the next office down." she said.

"Kuchiki-san?" he questioned

"Yes."

"These are for you." he said placing them on her desk.

"Who are they from?"

"I'm afraid I don't know that miss." he said and left.

She looked at the six dozen roses in the crystal vase sitting on her desk. No one had ever sent her roses before. Sure she received colorful flowers while she was recovering in the hospital but never roses, and so many of them.

Reading the card she was first confused then fascinated. 'Rukia, I wish to remain anonymous. The beauty of these blooms could never compare to your smile.' it said and she went awww.

"I thought you were dating Renji?" Ukitake asked.

"Well kind of, but well who do you think sent them?" she asked her captain.

"I haven't a clue. Whoever it was did spend quite the sum. Roses are out of season and rare enough here when they aren't." Ukitake said.

Later…

"Who the hell sent you roses?" Renji demanded.

"How the heck should I know. They're anonymous."

"What's this I hear, Rukia has a secret admirer?" Matsumoto said breaking in on the argument that had gone on for the last twenty minutes.

"Some guy sent her roses." Renji said.

"Yeah check out the card." Rukia said handing it to her.

"What you kept it!" Renji yelled.

"Oh that's so sweet." Matsumoto said ignoring Renji.

"What do you think?" Rukia asked.

"I think I'd wait to see if there's anymore. Whoever it is will want you to meet him soon. I wonder what he's like. I wish I had a secret admirer." Matsumoto went starry eyed.

At the manor…

"Good evening Byakuya." Rukia greeted.

"Good evening Rukia. Was your day up to expectations?"

"Yep, actually it was pretty good. Although Renji and I argued almost the whole latter part of the day. Well I'm going to bed. I'll see you at breakfast and tell you all about it."

The next day…

He found her energy and excitement over a bouquet of flowers to be a surprise so he set out to give her the same happiness he had the day before. But what to buy and what to write?

"Wow another gift." Matsumoto said holding up the white gold heart locket with the letter K engraved on it.

"This guy is really trying hard."

Rukia went to her room that night and read and reread the letter for any clues as to who this mystery man might be.

'My dearest Rukia,

Every day that I see you my heart aches because we are not together. I am so close to you and yet you stay so far away. I fear that I have made you believe that we can not be together and that could not be farther from the truth. I wondered for a long time how to approach you and tell you how I feel. I have come so close so many times and every time I have failed. You may not agree, but my heart is not closed to you. Every gift will be a clue to my identity. It is my fondest wish that in the time it takes for you to realize who I am, you will have warmed to the thought of us being together.'

"Who could it be?" she thought. "So he's giving me clues. This could actually be fun. A closed heart? What a strange way to put things. The only person who…it would never be him…would it? What am I thinking he's my brother."

The next day…

"Hey Rukia someone delivered lunch to your office." Sentaro said.

"Great thanks." she said opening the container. "Spicy curry. Very spicy curry. Water." she said noticing the Chappy the rabbit drink that came with it.

The note read 'Who would eat food this spicy and knows how much you love Chappy?' it said.

"Well it's definitely not Renji." she said with a laugh thinking about how much he hates spicy foods.

Later….

"Were you planning another outing with Abarai this evening, it is getting late?" Byakuya said in his night kimono ready for bed.

"Yeah a little later, there's a meteor shower tonight."

"Come and have tea with me." he said leading her to his bedroom. "Are you wearing your night kimono out?" he asked sitting on his side, his head on his arm in a perfect pose for a statue of Adonis.

"No I just threw it on." she said nearly drooling over the man in front of her, his chest was slightly exposed showing how muscular he was and his hair hug down lose.

"Good you will catch cold if you did and I know how cold you get." he said reaching up to pull her down next to him. She was laying practically flat with him length wise next to her. Their faces very close as they spoke.

"You know I'm a big girl you don't have to worry about me so much." she slapped him playfully on the chest and left her hand there..

"Yes I do. I can not help that I worry. Do you think I would be happy if something were to happen to you?" he tickled her side and draped his arm non chalantly over her.

"I guess." she shrugged.

"What do you mean you guess?" he said getting on top of her and pinning her arms over her head.

"I'll be just fine." she flirted.

"Without my guidance?" he stared into her eyes and let her hands go.

"Rules are more like it." she said opening the top of his kimono to tickle him, then they began to play wrestle a bit.

"I am head of our clan." he said looking up at her very lose kimono and feeling her heat from her straddling his pelvis.

"Yeah but whose on top?" Her kimono had ridden up and her bare opening pressed his growing hard on which was separated only by his thin kimono.

"I am." he said flipping her. His kimono had shifted in the struggle and his hardness had found it's way out he pressed himself to her wetness about to make entry.

She gasped at the contact and her eyes filled with desire. They looked at one another, nothing between them now, not even a tiny cloth, nothing to stop them this time from completing what they both wanted so badly for so long. Nothing but….

"Rukia?" Hey Rukia where the heck are you?" a voice came from the hall.

They had made the mistake of leaving the door to the bedroom open. He didn't want to budge and she finally had to push him away as they both straightened their clothing. Rukia was looking very guilty as she tied her obi when Renji entered.

"Taicho." he saluted. "You ready to go Rukia? I waited in the front room but the maid never came back. It's not like you to be late." he said the look on his face curious as he watched how she was fidgeting with her clothes.

Byakuya was pretty pissed at the interruption but he sat there calmly and arrogantly stretched out on his side with his kimono lose, the look of which told a story of something other then brotherly happening in the moments preceding his arrival.

"Yeah I...uh…I just have to change." she said leaving the room quickly. Byakuya gave his rival a crooked and predatorily smile which made Renji back out the door nervously.

Renji didn't question what had gone on prior to his arrival but they argued anyway over anything else he could thing of, he was a man, he wasn't stupid about the desires of men and he knew very well the two were not blood related. Two unrelated people in the same house for so long, one thing would lead to another sooner or later. It didn't matter if it was only a one time thing or not, it was bound to happen.

The morning….

"These came for you miss." a maid said to Rukia.

"Camellias. Where's the card. 'This should be easy for you my love.'" she read out loud.

The office…

"So did your secret admirer send you anything else? He must have, I haven't seen you smile this much in a while. You must have an idea who he is." Ukitake said.

"Yeah he sent me more flowers and they do give a clue, but it can't possibly be who I suspect. Do you have any idea?"

"I'd like to say it was me, but I can't take credit. If I wasn't so ill I would have courted you the first week you came to me. What was the clue this time?"

"Six dozen Camellias, dyed dark blue."

"I see. Amusing." Ukitake said.

"You know!"

"I do know." he said.

"Tell me."

"It should be rather obvious. You may want to keep the type of flowers a secret. Especially from your boyfriend. He's not going to take this very well when you've discovered who it is."

"Why do you think I'll leave Renji for him? That's ridiculous." she said.

"Not when you find out his identity. Besides I know you and Renji have always been close, but picture yourself married to him for the rest of your life, is it really what you want." Ukitake said.

Rukia spaced out and began to imagine what life would be like with Renji. She pictured a small officers house, she was in the kitchen after a long day working.

"Honey I'm home. Is dinner ready?" Renji said.

"It's still going to be a few minutes. I only just got home. God would you get Zabimaru off of the table." she said.

"How was your day?" he asked.

"Well it started out like…" she started then he cut her off.

"Well I beat all the new recruits today. Taught them all a lesson. Then your brother gave me a huge stack of paperwork. I don't want to complain but he's in such a bad mood all of the time. He asked if you wanted to attend a family gathering tomorrow, you know the one with all the food and attendants. You'd probably have to use their Onsen and wear a kimono. I told him you wouldn't be into that stuff anymore and you want to cook for me instead."

"Here!" she said throwing a plate on the table.

"What is it?" he said looking at his plate of blackened mystery meat.

"It's dinner." she said.

"Come on I know we can afford more then that."

"We could but junior's eating us out of house and home." she said pointing to the tall boy in the door way.

"Hey ma, pops." a boy as tall as Renji, with bright red hair with black streaks sat at the table grabbing a plate of bread rolls and sliding them all down his throat. "Oh turkey again, thanks ma." he said and began shoveling the burnt food in his face. "I'm getting' promoted." he said with food spitting everywhere.

"That's my boy." Renji said patting him on the back.

"Don't chew with your mouth open. Renji would you feed Yuki." she said pulling a baby out of a high cabinet and handing it to him.

"Why do I have to do it? She can't even fight yet." he whined.

"Because I have to feed Ren, Rin, Ron, Rod, Rom, Rim, Rop, Red, Rex, Rev, and Ronin." She said as red headed babies appeared all over the kitchen.

"They couldn't be that much trouble." Renji said.

"I'm off to train." Jr. said laving his empty plate with a bite taken out of it and half the table cloth, on the table and running out of the house eagerly with his sword.

"Not that much trouble!" she yelled.

"Sure it's nothin' ya can't handle, glad we refused your brothers gift of two nannies and a maid, besides we'll soon have three more." he said patting her belly.

"What!" she said looking down at her huge belly.

"Sure, we'll have to name the next boy after your brother. He'll be so happy." Renji said.

"He will? What?" she questioned looking disgusted.

"Oh here he is, Taicho thanks for visiting." Renji said.

"Dear Rukia, are you well? More children what a blessing. There's my nephew Rod. What a fine boy." Byakuya said picking up a baby.

"That one's Rin. It's a she." Renji said.

"How can you tell?" he asked.

"We put collars and tags on them. See the tags." Renji said pointing. "And they repel fleas and ticks as well.

"They're not dogs!" Rukia said and the children started barking one by one until there was a chorus.

"It really is a shame Rukia, if you only waited a little longer we could have been married. Too late now." Byakuya said to her.

"Yep I got her first. Now she doesn't have to read any more books, perform any more ceremonies for you or wear kimono. She can do everything herself too. Look how clean it all is." Renji said.

"That is a shame I did enjoy the way you poured tea and how close you always let me get when I instructed you in calligraphy. I am sure there is another noble woman who would be overjoyed to be my wife." Byakuya said

"Hey look whose come to visit, Hisagi how are you?" Renji greeted.

"I brought sake. Enough for everyone." Hisagi said handing out glasses of sake to the children first.

"Hisagi-san they're too young to drink!" Rukia yelled.

"Lighten up Rukia. You're always so serious about everything. I brought some girls too, don't worry there's enough for all those strong boys you bore Renji."

"What!" she yelled as the lights dimmed, a disco ball came down, and music started with a room crowded full of people and babies dancing wildly.

"NO, NO, NO, NOOOO!" she yelled as Ukitake was shaking her.

"I take it imagining life with Renji didn't go according to plan?" Ukitake asked.

"It was horrible, there…there…there was disco!" she yelled.

"Disco?" he questioned. "It may be best to also picture life with the person you are thinking about."

"Well…" she dazed off at the ceiling.

She pictured herself and Byakuya running toward each other on the beach in slow motion. The music cuts off.

"Wait that's not right." she said and tried again.

She pictured them both in the garden under the blooming Sakura. They were having tea that she was happily pouring. He took her hands in his.

"You pour tea so beautifully, your grace and beauty can be exceeded by none, and your calligraphy rivals that of my own. I am eternally glad that you allowed me to marry you. I love you." he said and she sighed.

"I love you too my lord." she said and they kissed passionately.

"My darling, have you decided to give me an heir yet?"

"I didn't have to decide, it's been decided." she said.

"You have made me so happy. Here I want you to have this." he said placing his scarf around her. "You're now head of the family. Here I bought this for you as well." he said handing her a Chappy the rabbit cake. "and this." he handed her a diamond necklace. "and this." a pile of folded kimono. "and this." the deed to a gold mine. "and these." an army of servants appeared. "and this." an airplane. "and this." he placed her hand on his heart. "I give you my heart."

"Awwww!" she said snuggling into him.

"Um Rukia? Rukia?" Ukitake urged.

"huh?" she said with a stupid look on her face, drooling a bit.

"Your drooling." he said.

"Oh." she said wiping her mouth with her sleeve.

"So was it any better? Was there disco?" Ukitake asked.

"No it…it was perfect. I have to go." she said rushing away.

"Ah Rukia If only I weren't ill." Ukitake said to himself then began to imagine what life would be like if he had married Rukia.

Ukitake began his daydream of what things would have been like with Rukia had life been different.

"Jushiro-kun come back to bed." Rukia said seductively.

"I thought we'd go water skiing or sky diving today." he said.

"How about we stay in, I got your favorite candy in liquid form and you can lick it off of me." she said taking the covers off revealing her nude body.

"Staying in would be fun too." he said joining her.

*Knock knock knock* "Taicho we have…"

"I'm going to give it to him." a female voice said.

"No I will." a male voice said.

"The two of you take care of the work, I'm making Rukia my lieutenant in charge of all her captains needs and we won't be leaving the bedroom for at least a month." Ukitake said making his two third seats go away.

"Now where were we my sweet? Ah yes." he said getting under the covers with her.

'hmm still stuck in bed, I could live with that.' Ukitake said to himself.

The sixth division….

"Sir you dropped this." Renji said handing the romance novel with the half naked man on the cover to Byakuya.

"Place it on my desk." he said not looking up to acknowledge anything.

"What are you reading that trash for? It's looks like something Rukia would read." Renji said.

"Yachiru asked me to give it back to her." Byakuya said.

"I'll give it to her. I'm having lunch with her." Renji said.

"No, I shall give it to her later."

"It's no trouble." Renji said.

"Get back to work." Byakuya commanded.

Renji grumbled and left. Byakuya had been extra mean to him lately and he didn't have a clue why.

Byakuya didn't get much work done because he was daydreaming about his future with Rukia. Byakuya pictured them out in their garden having tea over a small table.

"More tea?" Rukia asked sitting perfectly erect wearing full kimono with her hair done elaborately.

He nodded. " Suitable weather we are having." he said as she poured the tea.

"Yes but we may have a rainy evening in together… tonight. I hope it will be ok if we go to bed early." she said showing no emotion sipping her tea.

"Acceptable." he said showing no emotion either as they looked at one another.

*blink*

*blink*

The table had been thrown and it's contents crashed down as he pushed her to the ground and began tearing her kimono off. She clung to him and he entered her as quickly as he could, her moans driving him wild.

Byakuya was thoroughly enjoying his daydream.

Lunch….

"….oh and by the way Yachiru returned your book. Taicho has it." Renji said

"Byakuya has my book! Please tell me it's not the one…" she looked embarrassed.

"There's a half naked guy on the cover on a white horse, holding a red heart that's covering his…"

"Oh god." she said.

"What?"

"That explains everything! It's just like the book!" she said.

"What are you going on about? Lets have another drink." Renji said.

"It's nothing."

"You think your brother would mind too much if you crashed at my place tonight?"

"I think he would."

"You might want to start getting used to it, I can't remember the last time you were over."

Renji began to think about what things would be like if he and Rukia made the jump to being permanent.

Renji pictured them in his small apartment. Rukia was coming through the door wearing the same kimono she had to last years new year party. She looked very beautiful and untouchable.

"Welcome home Rukia. Are you going to make dinner?"

"You know I never learned how to cook."

"You should at least try."

"I know I know but I'm so busy."

"Let's skip dinner tonight and go straight to bed."

"That sounds like a plan." she said.

They were in bed together and she they were both nude under the covers. Renji turned to his nightstand to turn his alarm on.

"The red-man is coming for you baby." Renji turned and nearly jumped out of his skin.

"If you call me baby again Abarai I will destroy you." Byakuya said laying in-between them in his captains uniform over the covers.

"Hi Nii-sama, thanks for joining us. I'm so happy when you're here." Rukia said hugging him.

"What the heck are you doing here?" Renji yelled.

"I will not allow you to touch my sister. As soon as I can get this thing you call a marriage annulled, I am taking her from here." Byakuya said.

"We're married you can't sleep between us!"

"Renji don't yell at Nii-sama! You should be happy he's here. Even laying down he looks perfect, he's just the best at everything." she said smiling at her brother and he smiled back.

"Do not worry Rukia I will take you from here soon." Byakuya said.

"You're not taking her from me again." Renji said.

"Senbonsakura says differently." Byakuya said.

"Now now don't fight. Can't I love the both of you? Nii-sama is just so wonderful, perfect, and he always does everything right. And you well, with a little hard work you could be captain someday, not as good as Nii-sama but good." she said.

Renji came out of his day dream less then happy. He had let his mind wander and it went in a direction he didn't like.

Rukia went home wondering what to do, if she should say anything or not. She didn't see her brother and thought it best to avoid him until she could be a hundred percent sure that it was him.

The next day in her office she found a box on her desk. She opened it to reveal home made chocolates in the shape of the Seaweed Ambassador. The note was in calligraphy.

'Rukia I'm sure you have figured out who I am by now. When your shift ends you will receive instructions on where to meet me. If you do not return my affection spend the evening out with your friends and I will not bother you again.'

Rukia wondered what to expect later and what to do. There was still Renji to consider and what was being proposed seemed like walking into vipers nest. The amount of objections and open mouths she would have to face would be endless. Then there was still the fact that she would have to explain it all to Renji and he wasn't going to take it well.

The only thing left to do was figure out what she wanted to do and how much she was willing to go through to have what she wanted.

At exactly six o'clock a note appeared almost like magic on her desk tied to a rose.

'Go to the large plum tree in front of the tenth division.' it said. The tree was half way to her house so she left her office and went to the tree. She didn't see anything or anyone. Then she noticed that hanging from one of the branches was a note. It was hanging by a gold bracelet.

She unfolded the card and read 'I am glad you have decided to take me up on my offer. Although at this stage it may still only be curiosity. Look at the bracelet you will see a charm. It will tell you who I am incase you still have doubts. If you decide this is what you want, go to the iron gate in front of the Kuchiki manor.'

"It is him." Rukia said looking at the Sakura petal hanging from the bracelet.

"Hey Rukia what you up to?" Hisagi greeted.

"Hey Hisagi-san. I'm just heading home."

"I was heading over to the officers bar, why don't you come too, everyone will probably be there. Where's Renji I thought he was going to be with you tonight?"

"I canceled. I have something really important I need to do tonight."

"Can't it wait? It's going to be a blast." he said.

"No it really can't"

"What are you holding?"

"It's nothing." she said.

"If it's nothing then let me see it."

"I told you it's nothing…" she said as he grabbed it from her and read the note.

"Rukia I know this is personal and I heard about your secret admirer. Everyone knows about it. I assume you know who it is by now. Are you going to do what the note says?"

"I…I um…" she was looking guilty.

"What about Renji?" he asked.

"I've already told him I don't want to marry him."

"Yeah but he thinks that you will come around. It's obvious to everyone that your not into him that way but he thinks that you will at some point." he said.

"I have to go I'm keeping someone waiting."

"Rukia, you can't do this without telling Renji." he said.

"He'll be at the bar tonight right?" she said.

"Yeah."

"Just mention what you saw tonight. He'll get the point, and we wont have the, it isn't you its me talk that way, he'll save face. It'll be easier for him since he hasn't really confessed yet." she reasoned.

"I really don't want to bring him that kind of news, but you're right. It'll be easier that way. Although he might not believe me."

"Make him believe you and hopefully the next time I see him he will act normal and ignore everything." she said.

"Kuchiki you just ruined my night." he said.

"Thanks."

"Go and be happy." he said.

Rukia went to the gate in front of the manor and found another note tied to a bellflower. 'If you decide this is what you want enter and follow the candles. Everyone has been dismissed for the night.'

Rukia walked up to the front door and hesitantly placed her hand on the large wooden slab wondering what was really best. At first she wanted to avoid and hide from the whole situation but she knew she couldn't do that, then she managed some courage and pushed the door open ready to accept whatever she found on the other side.

The house was quiet. Candles and Sakura petals lined the wooden floor in the main hall, going far off into the distance. The only thing she could do was follow them, her footfalls light and slow.

She stopped just short of the door that led to her brothers room, a place she had been a thousand times, but this time she stood there contemplating whether she should go in or not. Noticing a tiny box on the floor she picked it up and opened it, revealing a ring with a large diamond. Instinctively she slipped it on then found a small folded note inside.

'Will you enter or not?' the note said.

She could see the room was lit by many candles by the glow it was giving off. It was possible she had stood there too long. In a way she was frozen.

Next thing she knew she was face to face with Byakuya in the hallway.

"It is late." he said. She only looked up at him. "Were you planning on standing here all evening?" he said looking down at her shocked expression. She had thought it was for a physical evening but she didn't expect the ring and what it meant.

"I didn't realize…" she mumbled.

"You are here so I shall assume you have decided on my offer, at least partially." he said.

"This…?" was all she could manage pointing to the ring on her finger.

"I see well since romantic gestures and proposals do not work…" he said picking her up. She gave him a small whimper but did not resist.

She stared at him as he carried her to his bed and placed her down. He got on top of her and noticing that she still wasn't resisting he took her wet lips. Finally sharing the kiss that they so long desired, he had only meant to test if she would allow him, he tried to pull away but she would not let him and the kiss deepened.

"There is no going back from here." he said.

"I know. I don't want to go back." she said.

"Good." he said taking her lips again.

Her kimono was off in a flash and his followed. They were both under the covers and he entered her as quickly as her body would allow. They were in a frenzy of passion and there were loud noises and sweat dripping from every pore of their bodies. They clung together in an overabundance of excitement. Desperate to make up for all the time they had lost, they had been moving so hard and so quickly that the paper walls began to shake by the sheer force of their movements.

"That was…" Rukia just looked like she had been ravaged, her hair sticking up and her eyes wide trying to comprehend what had just happened.

"Give me ten minuets." he said laying on his back.

"For what? Oh." she said feeling a bit embarrassed.

"Tomorrow I thought we would make the announcement." he got on top of her again. "Will you need to discuss this with…"

"Rukia are you home. Taicho! I'm sorry I didn't realize you had someone here the door was open and all those candles. I'll go. Rukia!" Renji yelled in shock at noticing who the girl was under his captain.

"Um…I can explain." were the only words she could think of.

"What possible excuse could you make this time! I came to see if what Hisagi said was true and It is! You and him! He's the one all this time! How could you! I thought..! Rukia! Damn it!"

Byakuya was a bit on the heartless side and gave the intruder a look of triumph. "Remove yourself from my house."

"I'm not going anywhere! You seduced her! I knew it! I just knew it! Your own sister! How could you do this to Rukia! Were going to do this once and for all!" Renji said holding his sword.

"You stand no chance against me." Byakuya said.

"Renji stop this. He didn't seduce me." Rukia said.

"How can you say that! I'm going to kill him!" Renji yelled.

"You don't understand." she said trying to reason with him.

"How can I not understand! You were mine before you were his! I thought I had you back! What changed between us!" Renji continued to yell.

"We're engaged Renji. I think you should leave." she said leaving the man speechless.

"You're a whore. I don't ever want to see you again." Renji said turning from the room.

"I understand." Rukia said.

"Prepare to…." Byakuya said starting to get up and reaching for his sword.

"No please don't." she said pulling him back.

"I will not let him get away with speaking to you in that manner." Byakuya said.

"I deserve it, just let him go, he needs to deal with this in his own way." she said.

The next day….

"Did you hear? The Kuchiki siblings announced their engagement this afternoon. To each other." Kyoraku said.

"Yes it was a bit of a shock." Ukitake said.

"It was a matter of time. Who could resist a woman so close for so long. I only wish my Nannao-chan would finally give up." Kyoraku said.

At the 11th…

"Did you hear about the engagement?" Yumichika said.

"Do you think it's fixed?" Ikkaku said.

"Of course it is, who would marry that prissy brat." Kenpachi said.

"You know I heard Rukia had a secret admirer doing all sorts of romantic things for her."

"So you think Kuchiki-taicho did it?"

"That's impossible."

"Your right."

"Yeah even I have to admit that would never happen." Kenpachi said.

"Renji is having a fit." Yumichika said.

"It's too bad no one's willing to kidnap Rukia to give her back to Renji." Ikakku laughed then everyone paused and looked at one another.

End or is it?


End file.
